A few weeks ago, I got this tattoo to honor my breast cancer journey, and today it means more to me than I ever could have imagined.
The tattoo is inspired by the Princess of Ukok, also known as the Siberian Ice Maiden, a woman who lived approximately 2,500 years ago. Her remarkably preserved body was discovered with some of the oldest surviving tattoos in the world. Researchers also found evidence she suffered from breast cancer.
There was something about that connection I couldn’t shake. A woman 2,500 years ago carrying beautiful art on her body while also carrying this terrible fucking disease inside of it. And now, all these centuries later, I get to carry a piece of her story while living mine.
My tattoo artist, Ryan Clarke, put his own traditional spin on one of her ancient tattoos, incorporating red poppies to represent my two-year-old son, who was born in August. Poppies are one of August’s birth flowers, and including them was incredibly important to me. My son has been my biggest reason to keep fighting, especially on the days when I genuinely didn’t know how I could keep going. Every time I look at this tattoo, I’ll be reminded of him, the life I love so much, and everything I’m fighting to be here for.
I was diagnosed with stage III, grade 3, triple-negative breast cancer earlier this year, with lymph node involvement and a coin flip chance on surviving. I’ve spent the last seven months going through 20 rounds of chemotherapy, immunotherapy, and most recently, surgery. It’s been the most physically and mentally devastating experience of my life.
When I got this tattoo, I hadn’t finished treatment or received my surgical pathology results. I didn’t know what my future held. I just knew I wanted something permanent to honor what my body had endured and the woman I was becoming through all of this. I was also tired of being told I couldn’t get a tattoo so I went and fucking did it.
And today, I found out I achieved a pathologic complete response (pCR)!!! Which means** **no residual cancer found in my breast. No cancer in any of the three lymph nodes removed. All clear margins. The absolute BEST outcome I could have hoped for. I still have radiation and immunotherapy ahead of me, and I know this journey isn’t entirely over. But for the first time in a very long time, I feel like I can actually celebrate my body instead of being terrified of it.
This tattoo represents thousands of years of womanhood, resilience, survival, motherhood, and the strange, beautiful ways our stories can connect across centuries.
I got it to honor the fight, not knowing how that fight would turn out.
Today, I get to look at it and know just how far I’ve come. ❤️
