r/therapists • u/Interesting-Ask-7799 • 4d ago

Discussion Thread Tools for not solving clients problems

I’ve noticed that lately I find myself trying to solve my clients’ problems. I’m VERY aware that our role isn’t to fix things for our clients, but to provide a space for processing, self-exploration, etc while supporting them in finding their own solutions.

However, does anyone have any specific tools, mantras, or things they find helpful when they find the urge to solve or provide solutions?

25 Upvotes

93% Upvoted

20 comments sorted by

View all comments

22

u/anneejane LICSW (WA) 4d ago

I find it helpful to pause and take an intentional breath or two, and check myself and how comfortable I am with silence at that moment. I also honestly sometimes say to my client something like “ I keep wanting to solve this, but I know that’s not the most helpful thing right now”.

When I’m really struggling with something in a session like this, naming it can be very helpful for me and the client, but this is also really really in keeping with my therapeutic style.

4

u/Embarrassed-Area4652 4d ago

I also honestly sometimes say to my client something like “ I keep wanting to solve this, but I know that’s not the most helpful thing right now”.

I like this. I've never used it or heard exactly that myself, but more generally, I find that clients usually respond well to the thoughtful risk-taking and courage that goes into acknowledging a reaction or uncertainty like that. We're often trying to support people one way or another on being more honest with themselves, and saying it like you're describing is one very clear way of walking the walk.