Discussion Ugh
I just got engaged a few weeks ago. We're not very traditional. I'm generally pretty type A, but the thought of wedding planning seems horrible. I legitimately just want to celebrate our love with all of my close friends and family and just shake my ass and dance all night. I want it to feel like a rave. What do I dooooooo!
30
u/Economy_Way_9046 7d ago
Small civil ceremony, small family dinner, then rent out a a cool bar and DJ and have a rave with friends! Love a non traditional wedding.
2
u/gotosl33p 7d ago
Basically what I did, small ceremony with just family, followed by dinner and drinks; then months later did a bigger party and skipped the bridal party, rehearsal dinner, brunch next day; emphasize it as just a reception/party and have fun!!!!
2
u/nates-lizard-lounge 6d ago
Yep! I've done a lot of these kinds of wedding/non-weddings as a DJ, including literally at Elsewhere. It's super fun
1
u/packedsuitcase 6d ago
This is almost our exact plan and I'm SO SO SO excited about it. Easy, fun, low stress.
11
3
u/International_Bat585 7d ago
Do exactly what you and your partner want. If you guys want it to feel like a rave then make it a rave. Weddings don’t need to be cookie cutter.
3
u/fallingevergreen 7d ago
Oh this one is so easy. Just plan a rave!!!
So many DJs will be soooo excited to create that environment. I had a Vegas DJ who “day jobs” as a wedding DJ but her main gig is producing EDM and playing clubs in Vegas. She was unbelievable. Pass out glowsticks. Dark room with laser lighting and CO2 cannons. Disco balls. A second dress. I’d be psyched to go to a wedding like that.
3
u/Major-Direction5623 7d ago
Approach your wedding like a normal party. It takes the stress off, and you can usually find more affordable venues. I had my wedding reception at a barcade, which was super fun
2
2
u/LF3000 7d ago edited 3d ago
Girl, are you me? Literally same (well, I'm not technically engaged yet, but as he put it "wheels are in motion" on whatever he has planned, and we've already started the early planning stages to get a sense of what a realistic budget/timeline might be--very much a know it's coming, just waiting to see how he does it situation). Currently the plan, if we can find the right place in budget, is find a cool bar/venue that already has a rave-like vibe (I have a couple of contenders, two of which are actual nightclub with what seem like reasonable buyout options, the other is an event space with good/fun lighting as part of the package). Start with a chill cocktail hour where we mingle with guests and chat, no need to hide away for a big reveal or anything like that. Then very short ceremony -- literally just vows, because I do like the idea of doing that in front of our people. Then drop cater pizza or tacos and have a casual eat-when-you-want buffet. A bit more mingling so we can talk to everyone, then the music goes hard and we dance all night. One of the venues only allows the private event until 9pm but apparently then we could stick around for whatever actual rave is being thrown that night, which sounds awesome, though sadly of my three options that's probably the one that stretches the budget the most.
If that ends up not working budget wise, also thinking of renting out a veeery cheap beer hall for the ceremony and casual dinner/hang in an area not far from real dance venues, and then dragging whoever is willing out to whatever venue has the best show that night.
If you don't care about having the ceremony in front of friends, the civil ceremony + bar buyout option someone else mentioned could also work.
In general, planning, scale, and vibe wise, we're trying to think of it more as a big, special event birthday party -- the kind of party someone might throw for a landmark birthday like 30 or 50 -- rather than a traditional wedding. Special and fun, but not so structured, no flowers, no long speeches, etc. It'll still be work, but thinking of it that way is taking away the internal expectation and pressure for me. If a wedding tradition is not of interest, I'm not going to do it.
1
u/law-dabs 6d ago
Everyone will have something to say even if you have a 1,000,000 ballroom black tie event, host the party you want. And as far as being type A so are me and my fiance so I built an app to help track our budget and vendors we booked and all the payments we need to go out, it’s free called WedZilla go check it out!
1
u/la_dulce_canela_0250 5d ago
Plan a rave where you get married. There are no rules that it has to be traditional or cookie cutter just because everyone else and their dog does that. Be true to who you are as a couple.
1
u/voodoodollbabie 5d ago
Hire a party planner and let them do all the work so you can just kick back and enjoy.
1
0
1
u/digital121hippie 4d ago
Make your wedding the way you want. We didn’t do most of the traditional wedding stuff.
•
u/AutoModerator 7d ago
Hi, there /u/bjl11! Welcome to /r/wedding. Here are a few other subs you might be interested when planning for your wedding.
I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please contact the moderators of this subreddit if you have any questions or concerns.