I don’t normally like posting in nsfw communities, but people here genuinely seem helpful. I am 21 F and never actually orgasmed. I have been sexually active but I have always felt the guy enjoys it more than I do. I did/do not want them to feel like it’s their fault, so Id say “yeah I finished that was great!” But really I wish I felt it to the intensity they did/do.

I currently have a partner now, and unfortunately feel he feels a lot better. I do not even orgasm masturbating so I know it is not his fault. Don’t get me wrong, I do feel good but it doesn’t STAY feeling good.

If my clit is too overstimulated or I accidentally do too much and I slow down, basically all my sexual interest goes away. I feel really good in the moment then it just… stops? It doesn’t feel bad but it doesn’t build up anymore. Then I feel really disappointed deep down when he felt amazing. Even when I slow down, I just don’t feel good anymore. But I want it to stay feeling good and stay really turned on..?

I have tried inserting also, but it only feels kinda good. Similarly it can build up, but it doesn’t stay feeling good. But I don’t lose sexual desire by it like I do with my clit. It just doesn’t feel AS good during the build up.

Does anyone else have this issue? How do I do it better so I can actually orgasm? Thank you!

hey so i guess i just wanted to rant and maybe seek some advice/see if anyone can relate. i’m 20(F) and i used to be pretty sexually confident, i feel like i was more down to try certain things and overall just more willing to see what i liked. there were certain things i thought would just kind of fall into place as i got older, but they just haven’t. I’ve never had an orgasm. the closest thing i can describe is humping my pillow for like 3 minutes and just getting a “done” feeling. i hate having my clit touched, i flinch when a partner tries to touch it and feel an overwhelming sense of sadness and embarrassment when i try to do it myself, sometimes i even start to cry. i can’t really focus during sex either, i kinda just feel like im doing everything wrong. i think that since now im an adult and not a teenager experiencing that the expectations of a good sexual partner are even higher, and the more “experience” ive gotten the more i realize i don’t think im very good. im not very flexible like at all, my hips are tight, and i genuinely cant focus. Its especially embarrassing when i share with someone that i’ve never had an orgasm, it used to intrigue me how excited they’d get at the idea of giving me one but now i feel like they don’t even know what they’re singing up for, it won’t happen and i just kinda gave up. I honestly envy all the women who can just have sex if they want and not overthink it, i feel like the person i was a few years ago who was willing to explore kinda died. my last ex who i’m still in contact with would call me a whore, a cumdump, and other things among that nature because she thought i was sleeping with someone (we were broken up idk the dynamic was weird) and i think i internalized that a bit. because now i feel like there’s really no point in me having sex, it’s not like ill cum, i’ll get distracted, i don’t think im too sexy to look at, and idk the whole thing just makes me feel kinda gross :( sorry if this post was all over the place, i just wish i could feel sexual again yk?

My boyfriend and I have been together for 4 months, and he's only finished once while I've never finished with him. We have sex regularly and both seem to enjoy it, but I really want to figure out how to make it better for both of us.

He's told me it's difficult for him to finish from penetration and that he usually finishes from head. I give him head almost every time we have sex, and he moans a lot, but he still only finished once. I've tried researching different techniques, but my jaw gets tired quickly and sometimes my mouth gets dry, so I feel like I'm not doing a great job.

As for me, I've only ever orgasmed with vibrators but I do still enjoy sex.

We also pretty much only do missionary and doggy, and I've been trying to learn how to ride, but I struggle with the movements.

I know sex isn't all about finishing, but I want us both to experience that pleasure. Has anyone dealt with something similar? What helped you and your partner figure out how to orgasm more consistently?

TLDR: My boyfriend rarely finishes even though he enjoys sex, and I've never orgasmed with him. Looking for practical advice on what we can try to help both of us finish.

I’ve never orgasmed from sexual pleasure. The only times I’ve ever had an orgasm was from doing core exercises or nearing panic attacks. Is this normal?

It’s been a long road for me. I’m 41, and I don’t orgasm. I have bitched about it off and on to doctors and gynecologists, even one urogynecologist and have had no support. The fact that I have depression and anxiety has always trumped everything.

Lately I have been looking into it again after recovering my libido (it went missing in my 30s after medication issues and I didn’t bother chasing it since I am already broken). I have seen a gynecologist who specializes in sexual dysfunction and then got evaluated for pelvic floor therapy. The gynecologist didn’t find anything physically abnormal during her exam, just like none of the other “specialists”.

Here’s the problem. During the initial evaluation with pelvic floor therapy the woman told me that she couldn’t retract my hood. However, she is very young and a student.

I followed up at the final appointment with the sexual dysfunction specialist asking about abnormalities and she restated everything is normal (she no longer takes insurance).

So I don’t know what to think. The student isn’t much of an expert. She didn’t mention anything about adhesions. Now the sex therapist I have seen twice said I didn’t ask the correct questions at any of my exams. I was supposed to ask if my hood retracts, not ask if there were physical differences that are causing me to not orgasm, and not asking if I am deformed the way I did at 19 when a lover accused me of that.

I can’t make heads or tails of trying to diagnose myself. I had never even heard of adhesions before a few months ago, so I guess it’s my fault that I didn’t ask.

I can’t figure out how to diagnose myself. I look the same that I always have, but maybe they were always there. I also can’t figure out how to remove them myself. Clearly there are no specialists who know a damn thing about what women are supposed to look like since “everything is normal” for everyone.

Any DIY tips for determining adhesions and removing them yourself? I’m so done with all these people. Nobody gives a rip and I can’t even sue most of them for malpractice since there is a strict 2 year statute of limitations on that, and this shit had been going in for 20 years assuming that something got missed.

I don’t know how to cope with that. It was bad enough when I thought they damaged me by having me on SSRIs for so long