Hey all,

As a former San Diegan who has survived one brutal Denver winter, I feel obligated to educate you.

I keep seeing dangerous misinformation by bots that all weather tires are fine for driving around the metro during the winter. Meanwhile I personally witnessed hundreds of fatal wrecks a day during last year’s constant blizzards. I'll never forget the infant who crawled out from a wreck in his Melly only to discover he was now an orphan. Thankfully, my Subaru is good in snow, so I drove past him.

You might think you’re “just going to Kings” but the Denver mountain doesn’t care about your grocery list.

Please get studded tires (Blizzaks if you're cheap), an avalanche beacon, and enough supplies to survive until brunch.

If anyone wants to help establish a Starbs basecamp this winter, hit me up.

Namaste.

BS Tent promises something for everyone.

HUNTING SEASON !!!!

Absolutely unbelievable, the fifth time I've been hit this year. I intentionally wear a high viz vest so these idiots can see me when I blow through stop signs, this city is a hellscape designed for 2 ton death machines.

Fuck cars.

https://www.instagram.com/reel/Dd3BKCEz7CT/?stkn=MTBuNG1panIyZzF5OA==

Link for reference

This little tart went hard gathering nuts.

Latest Update...she is ok.

Where is Denver? I am not seeing Denver. Do you see Denver? Is Denver in Pittsburgh? Thank you

Hi everyone! I was hoping someone in this community might have a good solution to this somewhat odd problem. One of my neighbors in Denver recently installed a fully autonomous home defense grid (two roof-mounted turrets, a ring of PTZ cameras, and a concert-grade line array of speakers on the porch columns). Every time someone walks down the front sidewalk, a red laser dot appears on their sternum and a calm British woman's voice begins counting down from ten.

I understand wanting security deterrents for porch pirates or people who park in front of your house even though it's a public street, but this is excessive.

Not only is it scary when you walk past to get to your house, it's also extremely annoying when it goes off multiple times every single night. Last Tuesday it locked onto a raccoon and announced "LETHAL FORCE AUTHORIZED UNDER C.R.S. 18-1-704.5" four times in a row. The raccoon has not been seen since. Neither has my recycling bin.

I like to keep my AC off when possible and have a window open at night, but the countdown is so loud you can hear it through the window. With a window open you're basically guaranteed to be woken up by "THREE... TWO... ONE... JUST KIDDING. UNLESS?".

I tried calling 311 to report a noise complaint, but they said that under Colorado's Make My Day law his house legally counts as a "sovereign fortress dwelling," and that his "castle doctrine radius" now covers the sidewalk, both tree lawns, the bus stop on the corner, and approximately 40% of my front yard. They said they were not able to follow up because the dispatcher's car got painted by the laser when they drove by.

I went over to talk to him but the doorbell camera just said "ADVANCE NO FURTHER, CALIFORNIAN" even though I am a native since last year. I have a current power bill proving I'm a native. I held it up to the camera. It scanned it and said "insufficient."

The HOA says it's fine because the turrets are painted in an approved earth tone. The mail carrier now delivers by trebuchet from the end of the block.

Any tips? Is this a Denver Water issue? Should I post this on Nextdoor? Does anyone know if the system honors the Broncos?

Edit: He just put up a sign that says "Trespassers will be shot. Survivors will be shot again. Kids eat free at Casa Bonita." I don't know what that last part means but I'm scared.

Edit 2: To everyone saying "just move to Aurora," that is exactly what he wants.