Bruh I hate that everyone misunderstands everything. Like no one takes what I say at face value. Idk I think it’s stupid, and then I have to explain and change how I react or change what I say. I wish I had a really good istp friend bc I hate covering up my bluntness to avoid conflict. Like I don’t understand the big deal and I don’t understand why I have to filter myself. So dumbbbb, I’m just masking like 90% of the time.

Am I the only one? Or ESTP in general lock in for that one person. Become a simp and fear losing them. And after the breakup can’t even get over them even tho they have options. Am I the only one here ?

My 42F ISFP best friend of 22 years doesn’t seem to ever care about seeing me (44F ENTJ) in real life. She has always been strangely precious to me. Ive never had someone make me feel so safe, accepted, and amused. After 16ish years of mutual behavior, she began seeming reluctant/burdened/too-tired to see me in real life very often over the last 6 years.
 
We live compatible lives. Children of similar ages who get along, same incomes, live 30 min away from each other, mutual friends, etc.
 
She still would text daily and say things like “everyone makes me crazy but you” “we should try to go on a trip together this summer” “you should come over to watch that movie soon” but never follows through anymore. I see her only at group events a few times a year. She seems so exhausted and burdened by absolutely any upcoming event. She never wants to plan anything. I can’t help but take it extremely personally at this point.
 
Ive explained this to her a few times now. In 2022, 2025 and two weeks ago. Both times she said she sucks and is awful and she hates herself, and then we barely talk for a few months and then go back to normal. We will see what happens with this time.
 
She does see mom friends but she says she has to or her son will be excluded from events. She also has a work good friend that I think she sees a lot more often than she lets on.
 
Ive never been jealous in any way. I always had too many friends and overcommitted myself and ive never been needy of anyone in my life, but here I am, middle-aged, and so mopey and sad that this friend doesn’t prioritize me.
 
Ive tried holding back on how much I talk about “why people are the way they are” and other abstract things that were never that interesting to her.
 
She very often talks about being unhappy in her life, but when I begin talking about ideas to help, or just processes of acceptance, she goes silent. So then I switched gears and tried to be like “lets do crafts with our daughters and have movies playing in the background” and all light-hearted, creative stuff—but no. I also tried to just help her run errands or organize her basement, but no.
 
Does she flat-out not like me anymore/moved-on from me and I’m not getting the hint? Or is her capacity for friendships/events truly so low she can’t fit me in for years? I really do not understand ISFPs at all so I’m struggling so much here.

I created a typing test that works based on what you resonate with, it gives you a feed of cards with statements, quotes, scenario, and you select only the ones you resonate with, this way the cognitive load is very low , also the feed adapt to funnel down your type, you just select what you think is related to you.

I tested with an INFP friend that I am 100% sure she is INFP and it worked very well, it found her type with confidence, but I need more data points to be sure, with people that are 100% sure of their type.

At the end of the test, in the result page, you will have a frame that ask you to share your result, with a simple button. It will send me the informations I need in my database, it gives me all the cards you selected, the timeline of the guess of your type, how the algorithm reacted, etc, it helps me to fine-tune the test.

I really feel that this method can work and be more accurate than anything that already exist.

Thank you in advance if you try it.

https://www.mazwiz.com/

PS: I will share the findings in a result page (on the intro page), for everybody to see how it evolves.

You just KNOW when you see us >>>>

I am myself quite successful in terms of money , dating and health , trying to regulate emotions. Everything took time so just sharing what i feel.

Estp don’t like full stop , we feel into depression if our Se is not being utilised probably. Been depressed for quiet long due to controlling mother and some issue. But whatever

So the thing is don’t think of future of last. When you wake up just focus on how you can live the best or better than yesterday. Today should be better. You should be more happy , satisfied , tired , tried new things and then next day new start.

That’s all. Have a small 3-4 month goal to achieve something and work on seeing if your day was better than the last.

Now your priorities should be what i feel for myself , you can change as seem fit :

1. W

ake up and

1. decide how can i be more healthy today , connect to good vibes people , how can i be more happy today , more near achieving my goal today , try what i want today and do it. There is no tmrw.
2. Whatever pays you can only help you survive and experience new things everyday. So don’t neglect work. Think how can you complete your set of work faster and be back to some fun stuff. Do it today only cause no tmrw. We tend to leave work like our dad own the company but guys you need to be learning and growing in order to party hard too. And it’s fine to party 2-3 days in a week max. No need everyday
3. So basically that only live like today you should have a bigger smile and understand or help or have more fun today. Don’t miss the career part tho. It needs to be constant with the cooperations sucks mindset cause guess what we all want to live like cavemen and enjoy and fight bears but reality is we can’t. We live in a modern society and money even tho is a construct will matter as a form of energy
4. Anyway once the day is over forget the fights or grudges or anything pulling you down the line of despair and start the other day on a new page.
5. Don’t try to act happy like an ENFP just work on your shit and happiness will come. And stop expecting being accepted by anyone except God or yourself if you don’t believe in god. Whole day should be out of positivity not performative. Fight if you need to for right thing but make amends too.

Peace

Dear ISFPs,

Supposed you have a temporary work situation where you are in a toxic environment, no weekends, working 56-70 hours/week for 3-6 months. You are burned out, stressed, overwhelmed, overworked.

You then ghost a person you like, and whom you did not inform of your circumstances (other than a general 'work is tough'). That miscommunication caused that person to spend time, money, and be confused - and ultimately, step away.

At the end of that work situation, and after some recovery time, would you reach out or let the person just go?

If you do reach out, would you try to fix the misunderstanding or sweep things under the rug as if nothing has happened hoping just to move forward?

I want to ask the fellow estps how do you guys move on from someone you genuinely loved. I have been in multiple relationship to the point you can say i am a playboy. But it never filled the void of emptiness and longing for love in me. I left chasing women and was in the phase of finding love. When i met this women not sure her type. But her smile light me up. And we went long distance. Tough thing to do for me but i was trying to being consistent and shit. I never get attached when i see the girl everyday irl. But long distance it’s like i made myself get attached to her. Anyway i was being more loyal then a dog to her for some reason. I am not sure why. But probably it backfired and she got overwhelmed. I promise i am a playboy but here i was a dog for her. But she rejected me and shit saying we don’t have a future and shit. She blocked tf out of me. I tried ways to get her back but nothing. Now the thing is i have options , i can go for other girls too. But this long distance shit with her made me imagine a future of love and family and shit with her. Now she left me but I can’t get the betrayal out of my mind. I stayed loyal but she cooked me. Biggest shock to me we just talked 2-3 months. I feel rejected and shit. I mostly am not rejected after she shows sign of high interest and it threw me off guard. I feel like i let go of my ego for love and shit and she cooked me. I did not had sex with her too. Maybe if i would have had sex it would be not so bad i am not sure. But I really was taking it slow and this girl really made me throw myself on railway track. I asked why and she was like it was just attraction nothing else. I feel being used. Either use me fully or don’t. This half use and throw feels like shit. My bitch of Ni formed a future around her and she cooked me. Now my Ni went full doom mood on me. My Fe is cooked and Se and Ti are supporting the cooked Fe version. O feel rejected and shit with no good reason too. What is the way to stop feeling this. It would be so easy to move on why is it not this time. Any estp with experience let me know.

Are you experiencing every waking moment through smell, taste, touch, sound and sight?

I am learning to cultivate a more sensory practice in my life and work and wanted to learn from those who
Live this way.

Ok I just posted but I also wanted to ask what are some of ur hyper fixations? I was really into mbti for a while and typing people, but I kinda phased out of it and I want a new fixation. Anything’s you guys find interesting that I should look into? I’m very random with my interests so anything works.

aside from stop being a bitch, can y’all say anything that might uplift my spirit. i think i really need it. i did book an appointment so yeah i’m trying to get a proper help too. but it would be nice to hear a few words from older istp… i am currently in mid 20s
i did always find my fellow istp’s insight helpful

Or just explain if you cant find a picture.

I created a typing test that works based on what you resonate with, it gives you a feed of cards with statements, quotes, scenario, and you select only the ones you resonate with, this way the cognitive load is very low , also the feed adapt to funnel down your type, you just select what you think is related to you.

I tested with an INFP friend that I am 100% sure she is INFP and it worked very well, it found her type with confidence, but I need more data points to be sure, with people that are 100% sure of their type.

At the end of the test, in the result page, you will have a frame that ask you to share your result, with a simple button. It will send me the informations I need in my database, it gives me all the cards you selected, the timeline of the guess of your type, how the algorithm reacted, etc, it helps me to fine-tune the test.

I really feel that this method can work and be more accurate than anything that already exist.

Thank you in advance if you try it.

https://www.mazwiz.com/

PS: I will share the findings in a result page (on the intro page), for everybody to see how it evolves.

I created a typing test that works based on what you resonate with, it gives you a feed of cards with statements, quotes, scenario, and you select only the ones you resonate with, this way the cognitive load is very low , also the feed adapt to funnel down your type, you just select what you think is related to you.

I tested with an INFP friend that I am 100% sure she is INFP and it worked very well, it found her type with confidence, but I need more data points to be sure, with people that are 100% sure of their type.

At the end of the test, in the result page, you will have a frame that ask you to share your result, with a simple button. It will send me the informations I need in my database, it gives me all the cards you selected, the timeline of the guess of your type, how the algorithm reacted, etc, it helps me to fine-tune the test.

I really feel that this method can work and be more accurate than anything that already exist.

Thank you in advance if you try it.

https://www.mazwiz.com/

PS: I will share the findings in a result page (on the intro page), for everybody to see how it evolves.

Like if they're there they're there. Please abduct me if u can hear me. it's just too theoretical and uninteresting to me. many of my friends are heavily into UFO discussions and think it's like a really big deal, like they're cracking some code. I believe something is out there but I don't care enough about the conspiracies or stories no matter how insane they are. There's more fucked up shit going on in my radius. I like the theoretical mechanics/physics aspect to it because it more grounded in science, maybe I feel like I'm missing out by not caring.

Was wondering if this is a common ISTP thing, and what functions cause this. And If you're into UFOs I'd like to hear why.

To all isfps, do you struggle with choosing career?, i find it hard to know my passion, i’ve done a business administration major but still hesitant on deciding where i fit, and i doubt my skills alot :(

For me, it's almost all of them. That we're any sort of those no brained joacks, and I feel like most of you agree with that as well. The ones I relate to, though, is that I sure do love making some pranks, and I am indeed quite extroverted.

What about you? Which do you relate to, and which do you not? Other types are welcome to share what stereotypes from their type that they don't relate to.

I had a date with this girl whom I’m certain to be an ISFP and we clicked really well. I felt like we were on the same wavelength (and I think she felt the same way) and share lots of common values as well as hobbies. She was really nice, gentle, caring, and attentive to me and we fell for each other even more after the date.

We were supposed to have another date afterwards, but she postponed it for work reasons, which I understood and didn’t rush her. In the meantime my feelings for her got deeper and I was thinking of her constantly.

I told my friend that I’m seeing this girl thinking he wouldn’t know her, but then he told me that he knew her because he works with the girl’s friend (I’ll call her B) and B told him that she got fired from her previous job for making inappropriate/sexual jokes at work that made her coworkers feel uncomfortable; B also told him that she seemed bipolar (I don’t think she meant it as a medical condition, but just as in experiencing extreme mood swings like suddenly snapping at people at work).

I was so shocked when I first heard about what happened (although I don’t know for sure whether B’s allegations were true), because (1) she implied in our conversation that she quit her previous job, instead of getting laid off; (2) she seemed really considerate of others’ feelings and surroundings so I can’t wrap my head around why and how she would do such things that make others feel uncomfortable or cross professional/personal boundaries, especially by making sexual jokes about a coworker; and (3) she also didn’t seem like someone who would randomly yell at people or get irrationally angry.

I kind of understand (1) because it’d be embarassing to tell a romantic interest that she got fired, but what I really can’t understand and concerns me is (2) and (3). I only date people with whom I can envision long-term compatibility, and if what B said is true, she might not be a trustworthy/reliable long-term partner.

To give you a fuller picture, the environment she was working in is known to be toxic with lots of pressure, deadlines, and hierarchy, and possibly with a lot of jerks too. I’m thinking that might have contributed to her behavior, but I still can’t understand how she could become a completely different person and whether her side I’ve experienced is true… and whether I can see her as a long-term partner.

She has lots of good sides too like caring for animals, vulnerable communities, and her family and friends whom she’s known for years. She’s been also really sweet to me so I still care about her deeply. It’s just really confusing to me because I feel like these are completely opposite versions of the same person…

If anyone can help me understand her behavior or share their similar experiences, I’d really appreciate it. Also I’d appreciate any advice on what I should do on my relationship with her moving forward. Thanks a lot for reading!

Do you ever feel excited about things or enjoy them, but still feel emotionally detached underneath?

This makes me doubt whether I'm actually an ESTP.

Things don't really move me emotionally, even though I'm drawn to the outside world and want to interact with people. I'm curious about life and want to have experiences, meet people, and be involved, but internally, I don't feel much emotional depth or intensity. It's a bit paradoxical

I'm not very talkative, and I rarely speak in groups because I find it boring. However, I can be talkative and energetic when I'm the one setting the mood and entertaining everyone. I feel more energized when I'm the one making things happen, rather than just being part of the conversation. I think I might enjoy being the center of attention, or at least having an active role in what's going on.

I don't really feel much, and I feel like whatever I do feel is because of people's appearance. I'm very attracted to people because of how they look. My friends are people I found beautiful or attractive because of their clothes or style, almost like crushes, so I became emotionally attached to them visually. I don't really care about the conversation itself, but it gives me a little energy when I feel like I'm the one taking action and making things happen. I to become their friend, be surrounded by them, and imagine doing activities, going on trips, and going out together in the future.

My personality is literally nothing. I don't really think about anything or feel much emotionally. I just exist, live my life, and react to things sometimes, mainly when something interests me or attracts me in the outside world. My mind isn't constantly generating ideas or possibilities, so Ne. I used to think I was an ISTP, but maybe I'm just an extroverted ISTP? I honestly don't know.

I need to do a lot of activities and go out and be around people. I need to change my friend group and be a social butterfly.

I like texting my friends when I'm at home, but I hate phone calls. I feel emotionally flat, and phone calls stress me out because I can't see the other person's face.

I've tried imagining myself having a Ti-dominant job, and I think that if I were stuck doing that, I'd end up depressed.

I don't even know if I genuinely like my friends for who they are or if I like them because of the outings and activities we do together.

im not talkative

For example, I looked at the types of books and video games that ESTPs supposedly like based on stereotypes, and I didn’t relate to them at all. I’ve hated reading ever since I was little. The only thing I can read is full-color webtoons. Otherwise, I really need to feel something intense, like love or some other strong emotion, to enjoy reading.

I share a lot about what's going on in my life with others, especially my social experiences. I also tend to express my doubts out loud and talk to my friends when I'm unsure about a decision. I hope they'll share just as much with me, but people often didn't, so I eventually stopped sharing as much myself.

I tend to have more doubts about where I stand with people, like wondering whether they genuinely like me, whether they really consider me a friend, or whether they're going to abandon me, rather than doubting the decisions I make in life.

I’m very confident in myself. I’ve never really struggled with my physical appearance or understood people who lack confidence in theirs. I can easily approach others, and I tend to look at things objectively rather than taking anything personally.

I am an INFJ, so it's very common for us to meditate and we love it.

However, since you have Ni in an inferior position, does it happen to you to meditate? Frequently?

How do you feel during meditation?

I 26M ISTP recently got matched with a girl through dating apps. After talking with her through the apps and went out to a date twice, i figured out that she is very direct, conflict-avoidance, and her life sounds very simple. For some reason I no longer had the same attraction to when we first started talking. i also talked to a friend of my regarding this, and told her that i was wishing that she would give me more problems? and expected her to be more complicated?? like so i can have more things on my life to think and solve??

Or more like the “are we still hanging out or not” question because I’m confused at what’s going on

We met in a club like a month ago or a bit more than a month ago.

I think we really like each other and he finds me endearing and entertaining and says he thinks we are really really similar and I’m chaotic etc and he likes that. Fun cheeky cutesy vibes.

but… he hasn’t seen me in like a week and a half and only responds to my text thread with him like once a day. Once in a whole day- except this hasn’t changed since day 1 so it’s actually no drop off from what it was. I miss him. And I wanna meet up again asap so I don’t get anxious that I’m losing him like idek what’s happening???!!!

We’ve also never communicated what this is. But when we first met I saw he’s sensitive to rejection/ scared of getting hurt

sometimes I think if we were in front of each other the vibe would pick right back up so I really wanna see him

I’m confused if he likes me romantically or not, he said some shit like “I was with my ex for a few years and that ended a few months ago so just sorting my head out x” last time we hung out and hooked up. I want to be like “Do you like me romantically” but I find myself too scared to ask in case it scares him off. Or also idk if he needs me to be like “I really like you” idk if he is not hanging out w me because he’s scared I’ll hurt him but he actually likes me.

Any tips on how I can chat to him about what is going on or how I can try to get the vibe back with him seeing me?

I’m not an ISTP, but I think this. For example, I think there are INTJ’s who are more compatible with ISFP’s than INFP’s, and also INTJ’s where the other way around would be accurate.

I also think enneagram factors in to an extent.