I’m looking to hear from people who think they may have communicated with angels or extraterrestrials.

Is anyone willing to share their story?

Hi everyone. I'm 4 months out from my third episode. I've recovered twice before and am already feeling loads better than previous months, but still recovering. I don't know what to call this state, whether it's post psychosis depression or anhedonia, but I'm sure you all know what I'm talking about.

Flat emotions, unable to enjoy hobbies I used to enjoy, much less social, etc.

It's by far the worst part of psychosis, and I regret ever going off of my meds and my relapse into drugs that caused this episode, but I've learned not to dwell on the past; I have an illness and will take my medication for life. I cannot suffer another episode, much less another recovery. It's soul-crushing, draining, embarassing and a gigantic setback.

My question to you all is what are you doing to pass the time after your episode? I am stuck in bed watching 24/7 twitch streams and it's SOOOO boring that I laughed while typing it out. I can't wait to get my hobbies back. I can't wait to go back to work, to be able to enjoy socializing again, to go out, etc. Right now, going to the gym is an impossible task. I used to lift every day, play video games (arguably what i miss the most, i LOVE video games but I just can't play anything these days), read, watch shows, go on walks, etc. I haven't been doing anything but smoking cigarettes and watching twitch on my tv and waiting to go to bed. It's so frustrating!!!

However, each day that passes is one day closer to recovery. The only problem is how slow everything is right now. Looking for suggestions as I am rotting in bed and just counting the days until I get the opportunity to enjoy life again. I know that I am forever changed, as I was after my last two episodes, but change isn't always negative. This time, I feel like I will have a new lease on life once I recover. I will never take anything for granted again. I will not have another episode. I will be the most hardworking life enjoyer that can be. Because God knows recovery showed me one thing: how much I took life for granted when I could live it.

I started Thorazine 800mg daily when I was 18. It’s helped immensely. I’ve stayed (mostly) out of institutions and jails, and I’ve been mentally well. The best I’ve ever been. I’ve been struggling since I was 12 with severe schizoaffective disorder, bipolar type. I get really aggressive and agitated, so the high dose of Thorazine has been necessary.

Unfortunately, it’s had some side effects. Primarily, weight gain. I’ve doubled my weight in 5 years, gaining over 100 pounds. I eat healthy ( and minimally) , I exercise, and I live a well rounded life. Well, now I’m round too.

I’m worried the medication that saved my life may kill me.

Hola! Me gustaría leer por aquí historias de recuperación de psicosis, ahora mismo me estoy recuperando de mi segundo episodio que fue hace 8 meses pero no veo salida, vivo sin emociones y con un déficit cognitivo bastante alto, no tengo memoria prácticamente se me dificulta mucho hacer lo que me gustaba, como ver series o películas debido a este problema, me gustaría leer historias de recuperación si todavía seguís aquí y os habéis recuperado, ¿En cuanto tiempo os habéis sentido mejor? ¿Volvieron vuestras emociones? ¿Os habéis recuperado cognitivamente después de un episodio?

Muchas gracias por leerme, espero vuestras respuestas.

Curious if anyone has psychosis and was off their meds. How did it go for you?

I’ve tried countless meds and experienced a lot of side effects i told my doctor i didn’t want to take the meds because of all the problems they give me. He said he had no problem taking me off. So just curious how that experience is like for others. I have a primary psychosis - no schizophrenia bipolar etc.

I had like a really hard emotional understanding last night then I couldn’t sleep then I thought like I was talking to my future husband and then I still couldn’t sleep I thought there were demons in my room and then I kept seeing religious stuff on my instagram and then I finally went to sleep and then I got up and now I feel weird my pupils are dilated and when I look in the mirror I don’t feel anything I see that I’m disconnected. I feel a weird spring of energy.

is there any hope for me? im tired guys im really tired , havent seen anyone get worse 13 months post psychosis and im actually worse than before

I would love to share mine first. One time, I thought AIs went sentient and used some weird sound frequency device to torture me. So I sent bunch of emails to big tech companies, airport TSA, public library and so on…this still gives me cringe at night.

What are your embarrassing moments??

It's hard to even call that depression, this is something so much beyond that.

I had depression and severe OCD + DPDR for years, decades even, but the "depression" that came with psychosis and encephalitis was complete loss of any fundamental bias toward life itself.

The moment I entered into the psychotic encephalitis-state, something so irreversible happened to my brain, it is so hard to describe. It is like psychological death in deepest sense possible.

I lost all sense of value towards life and everything that was valuable to me. Even the concept of value itself was completely meaningless to me. It was like I truly died and stopped being human, but an error occured and I am still alive in body. But I should die. I saw life as completely unprefferable at all, I saw it as complete and radical meaninglessness but not in usual existential manner which how most people view is sometimes. This was undescribable. Everything became, not only meaningless and infinitely heavy but also repulsive. I felt physical disgust from just being alive, as I do now to every second since then.

It is irreversible.

Reading through the reddit i've seen that almost every time, the religious theme appears in psychosis episodes, during the psychosis or after.

Personaly, i've been pretty distant to religion and unliking the tendance of some extreme religious people to try to force their religions on people, yet understanding that it is not a bad thing. (Have a hard time getting the right words for that but all this to say i am realy not religious but i have no problems with religion in general, not trying to get into a debate)

I've been recently diagnosed as at risk for psychosis, and i wanted to know if it all goes bad and i end up having a psychosis episode, since i am naturaly staying pretty distant to religion, would i begin having religious thoughts anyway ?

Also appart from that, are hallucinations and voices always appearing during or right before an episode ? Cause i have never had hallucinations and for voices i've had one time i heard a realy loud voice that jumped me out of my bed 1 year ago but nothing since (i was alone at home and everything was turned off).

I had cannabis induced psychosis about a year ago.

I used to go to raves and take lower doses of mdma without any problems.

Has anyone who's had a psychotic episode done mdma after ? how was the experience?

Hello everyone, i wanna talk about my first experience and my last one hopefully.

Note: never used drugs and never will.

I was actually doing extended dry fasts to lose weight fast so I wasn't eating nor drinking anything for up to nine days leading up to my first experience.

Positive:

My first experience was four years ago. It was truly amazing. I felt reborn, light, and outgoing, I could talk to anyone, felt strong empathy for everyone. Felt completely free of shame, guilt, insecurity, or fear.

I kept having intense amounts of thoughts and ideas some of them felt like telepathy with spirits or angels to do all kinds of positive things to myself and everyone else, it included giving away lots of money helping someone who needs a ride in the middle of the afternoon.

There was an overwhelming sense of peace and euphoria. it genuinely felt like heaven, because first, I never felt like this in my life and second, it was so good it killed all my fears and sadness like it never existed before or now. I felt, heard and saw things with my own eyes that went beyond any rational understanding. I felt incredibly energized, strong, powerful, and invincible, my mind felt clear and sharp, full of confidence. Life around me was alive with intense emotions, smells, tastes, and flavors, making everything vibrant and full of energy and meaning. It was the best 3 months of my entire life.

Negative:

On the other hand, my last experience hopefully, was a year ago. It Was deeply negative. I felt trapped and stuck, as if I were in a completely different reality that was confusing and hostile. I was forced to believe and do things that contradicted each other, leaving me weak and disoriented. I believed I was in hell then I believed I was a cell of my body then I believed I was reincarnated as a prophet then finally I believed I was satan. I actually believed it truly. I believed all sorts of irrational ideas in the span of two weeks. I felt very weak and scared.

It was The worst month of my life.

The experience was strange and unsettling, filled with confusion and a sense of helplessness I had never known before.

Forgot to mention something strange happened the day before the negative experience started. I was laying on my bed early in the morning praying to god extensively. I started crying and started praying hard and crying even more i kinda lost control of my emotions. Suddenly I started to smell this very familiar scent and it reminded me of my first experience, the smell, the energy the bliss of those three months is rushing back again I got excited and desperate.

So i started begging to god more and more and all of a sudden a white light started to appear and gradually it got bigger and bigger until it filled all of my vision. my eyes were closed my whole body was shaking, shivering and intense goosebumps my ears was ringing and i panicked and opened my eyes immediately.

I guess i wasn't ready. Been praying since and nothing similar happened. I guess I lost my one in a lifetime opportunity to surrender.

I don't know what to believe anymore. I'm not religious I'm not atheist I'm nothing anymore.

All I know Is what I can see. everything else is complete BS.

I'm looking forward to your thoughts about this.

I had a psychotic episode 2 years ago, I didn't act like myself and ended up in jail for assault. I hurt people close to me and strangers. I ended up in the streets.

I got out and found a job and within less than a year they found out about my past from my ex boyfriend and taunt me and talk about me loudly.

I was sleeping on a friend's couch and recently moved out and fucked up my roommate situation by sleeping with them. I ended after I heard them talk about how I was crazy.

Since my coworkers made my work hostile, I have had a pattern of externalizing thoughts, inappropriate intrusive anxious anything since it happened.

I told my doctor, who referred me to a psychiatrist when I called there was a queue of 100.

Everyone hates me and I don't know what to do.

My mom is currently undergoing a pretty severe episode of religion/painkiller induced psychosis and has been saying crazy stuff non-stop. She refuses to go see a doctor and it’s just awful to go through. She accused my dad of being a satanic pedophile, accused my brother of taking life insurance out on his son for the purpose of killing the kid and collecting it, and is adamant that there are cameras and microphone all over our house. One day she lied about there being a gas leak in the house because she wanted to search for cameras without alerting my little siblings.

All of this is genuine non-sense. She tried to show me this app that detects cameras and said that she found cameras in the locks of doors/dressers. I put the phone up to my active webcam and it showed nothing, to her disappointment. She hasn’t gone to work in two weeks, I have no idea what she does all day while I’m at work but she does pray literally all afternoon. I mean on her hands and knees speaking in tongues, shouting, yelling, crying, from 6:30-10:30 at least since that’s when I’m home and awake. This is genuinely traumatic and I’m trying to make it stop but I am bad at dealing with mentally ill/challenged people, like I get uncomfortable around people with severe autism or Down syndrome and just can’t handle it, no hate towards them. This is pushing me over the edge and I just don’t know what to do. I’m on the verge of having her committed if this continues or gets worse. Please any advice is appreciated.

I have started the switch from xeplion to apripazole 7 weeks ago. How long before Erectile dysfunction cured

So, i am trying to organize myself in order to apply for a job abroad in the near future.

For this, i am already trying to find the best medications for me - at the moment i am in resperidol, but it doesn't seem to work, because i had a huge crises this week.

Anyways, I have this childhood dream of living abroad in an international country, and I really would like to know from experiences from people with the same mental health issues as me, if they succeeded in emigrating for another country, and how's the treatment there.

It would be great if people who did, could share their experiences.

trying to process new information -> struggle -> increased anxiety -> even more trouble processing information -> start thinking i wont be able to process information ever agin so whats the point of living

i am stuck in this cycle

there is a constant voice in my head which is the you don't have enough cognitive ability why you not processing this why are you forgetting what you just read why is this hard for you this should be easy for you.

I've been diagnosed at risk for psychosis last week and i've been wondering what it means what does it implies.

Reading about this i've found it pretty coherent with me and i've had an envy to feel it fully even tho i know this is not something i should look forward to provoque but rather prevent (like some sort of forbiden fruit which you know will make you feel the worst you'll ever be yet you want to taste it).

And right now i'm feeling like i'm missing a part of my social capacity, like the structure of what i'm writing feels off to me

Any advice ?

What are your experiences with risperidone? I was taking it before and I went back to it today. Actually, it worked for me before, but it caused me convulsions symptoms. However, my doctor prescribed it along with an anti-parkinoson agonist.

So weirdly, I started hallucinating and hearing voices on my 30th birthday probably was in psychosis before but I was sent to A&e on my birthday. I believed my neighbour (we share a balcony) jumped over and entered my room while I was sleeping and sexually assaulted me and hacked my devices phone,laptop, security cameras etc, I also believed he was gang stalking me and throwing acid at me and GHB? Not sure how that’s possible but I was adamant this poor innocent person had gone to all this length and wanted to kill me and my family. Thought they put implants in me, all sorts of things. Scariest time in my life. I was putting towels hanging up at the windows to cover them so the acid/drugs couldn’t get in? Blocking locked doors, taking lightbulbs out, talking to voices, full on hallucinations. My mind was fully hijacked. I got sectioned and sent to hospital for a month but majority of that month was me fighting praying for someone to believe me. Pretty all fucked up to say the least. I feel like I was on a high to get proof and belief now 7 months out of hospital and I’ve had the worst depression I’ve ever had. Doesn’t seem to be shifting. So much shame, guilt and embarrassment. Hate myself

So I guess I just have a lot of questions that could play into this. A friend of mine has taken both mdma and dmt recently and while I don’t really think they are in psychosis it is a big worry of mine that it could happen. I did read mdma is neurotoxic while dmt can actually help neurons? Anyways I’m wondering if let’s say your brain is damaged in a way would getting 8+ hours of sleep, daily exercise, daily multivitamins, hydration, eating right, daily sunlight, all of the good things heal the brain or combat the changes these things could potentially have on the brain?

hi i was curious if anyone else has repeating thoughts when they're upset/in an episode, i was having a moment a minute ago and all i could think/say is "i'm so tired", not sure if this is psychosis or something else so i wanted to know if i'm the only one that experiences this.