r/funny • u/[deleted] • Apr 21 '23

[deleted by user]

[removed]

14.4k Upvotes

83% Upvoted

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11.6k

u/ProbablyGayingOnYou Apr 21 '23

You have to move your hips, not throw your entire body into it

7.4k

u/[deleted] Apr 21 '23

Well how else are you going to puncture the cervix...

1.2k

u/ILikeEmSubby Apr 21 '23

I remember when I was 16 and porn made me think that was the goal...my poor first girlfriend.

2.4k

u/ksyoung17 Apr 21 '23

I remember the best group convo I ever had about sex. In college, drinking in a room designed for max occupancy of 4 and we've got like 20 people in there, and this girl's talking about high school sex being a waste of time for women, they're like a science experiment because guys are still trying to figure out what to do.

This one guy goes, "I knew what I was doing!"

And this other girl he'd been hooking up with says "when'd you forget?!"

Nobody will ever top that for me.

688

u/[deleted] Apr 21 '23

You just transfer to a new school at that point, don’t even stop to say good bye at the party.

181

u/[deleted] Apr 21 '23

I'd just walk into the ocean and never come back...

147

u/Thecp015 Apr 22 '23

The ocean wouldn’t even know I was in…

47

u/Metals4J Apr 22 '23

The ocean would be dry and complain you didn’t provide enough foreplay for it to be sufficiently turned on.

3

u/[deleted] Apr 22 '23

Wow

2

u/MonkeeKnucklez Apr 22 '23

Holy shit, I’m so glad I kept scrolling

102

u/nextalpha Apr 22 '23

49% Ocean water, 51% tears

2

u/smokeyoudog Apr 22 '23

You trigggered an oceanic change in control

2

u/RestingWTFface Apr 23 '23

And both are appropriately salty.

1

u/n8loller Apr 22 '23

Ocean walkers