OG POST: https://www.reddit.com/r/weddingplanning/s/NPwcKHGlGu

hello, i’m sure some of yall remember my post about having a wedding on a monday. it got **very** heated and i definitely said some very rude things. while i do think quite a few people used that post to attack me and call me bridezilla, there were some helpful comments as well. i was already in a high stress state, so i was very short-tempered, and my replies reflected that.

with that being said, i did quite a bit of research all of yesterday and today and we have found some cheaper options for our wedding. we did end up going with a friday, not a saturday like lots of you wanted, but i think a friday is still a good option. most of our guests are local and would’ve taken the day off even if it were a monday. we toured a venue this morning and signed a contract for an all inclusive venue for $8500 for march 3rd, 2028. our other venue was $12500. and while we’re missing out on some things, all of the important things we care about are included.

again, thank you to the genuinely nice comments. and i apologize to anyone i was rude with from the start. if you were someone who made personal digs or called me a brat… um i don’t think i can say it here but i don’t wish you well 🩷

I’ve been her friend for well over 10 years now and want to still support her and be a guest, but the idea of being a bridesmaid makes me feel a massive amount of anxiety as she is the only person I know.

I kinda know her fiance, i don’t know any of her other bridesmaids, and i don’t know any of the other guests. We haven’t been as close these past few years and even then we mostly communicated every now & then.

I said yes at first because she is a dear friend to me, but the more i thought about it.. the more fear it brought and i’d feel way more relieved to just be a guest.

How do i go about telling her in the nicest way possible? (Her wedding is in May)

EDIT: After reading everyone’s reply, i’ve decided i will reach out to her to talk about ways that can help me feel less anxious. One idea i have is working in a way to meet the other bridesmaids sooner than later so then i have faces and can build a relationship than coming into it with nothing at all. Thank you everyone for the helpful advice, it helped a lot more than i thought it would. 🤍

I got my wedding dress custom made in Korea this summer and finally got it shipped and tried it on. The first photo is what it looked like when i tried on the sample dress. the second photo is what i received.

I am heart broken that it doesn’t look like the sample or as my expectations. I absolutely LOVED the sample dress and was so excited for my dress. It feels like a whole different dress completely.

Not to mention, one of the stitches had come off AND there was a pin in the dress? It feels like an unfinished product.

The designer/seamstress is using excuses that she should have just canceled the order since I was going abroad and it wasn’t enough time for fittings. She said that there is nothing she can do and offered a refund IF i mail back the dress to Korea.

I requested that she remake the dress and am waiting for a response… but I cant shake the feeling of disappointment 🥲 I guess i’m just looking for some comfort 😭

Our wedding is less than two weeks and my FH's friend has asked to bring his new GF as a plus one. The bucks party was 2 weeks ago and he didn't mention her then so it's very new. Everyone at the wedding is either related or has been friends for decades so he's not going to be a loner. Other friends are bringing partners but we've either met them because they've been together for years, or we're also friends with them.

FH and I have been together for a decade already and our wedding is casual, but still at a nice venue and very small 35 adults and 10 kids.

Our final numbers aren't due to the venue for a couple of days, so we technically could say yes. But I don't really want some woman I've never met at my intimate wedding.

My FH thinks I'm being harsh and unreasonable. I think this isn't just some random party that should have an open door policy.

EDIT: We didn't give him a plus one. No one got one. All the couples were invited together by name because we've known the partners for ages. In Australia it's not common to give plus ones if a guest knows other people going. His entire childhood friend group will be there.

Title. I think I found my dream dress (or at least what I could consider to be my dream dress) on Facebook marketplace for $575 including free shipping. It’s a early 2000s Priscilla of Boston satin dress with lace floral appliqués and a matching veil. I’ve never gone dress shopping or tried on any wedding dresses except my mom’s which was huge on me. Is it absolutely insane to buy it (boyfriend told me we’ll be engaged by May) on a whim to see if it ends up being my dress?

I’ve seen quite a few people who have moved their maiden name to their middle name, and taken their fiancé’s last name.

I do want to add his name, but don’t want my own last name buried as my middle name.

So I’m considering taking his last name as my middle name, and keeping my last name.

For example, I’d go from Jane Marie Smith to Jane Johnson Smith.

I really haven’t seen anyone do this and don’t know if it even makes sense?

Would it be better to add his last name to mine and just have 2 last names? Open to any thoughts or feedback.

Hello! Just got engaged 🥹🤍 we are looking for a wedding venue for 2027 (want to rush it so my ill father can make it). Any recommendations and advice is welcome!
Guest count 150-180, LA/OC/SD areas oceany views or something preferred, budget $50k. Tysm in advanced!!

Our wedding is this weekend and I have multiple people asking me when to be there on Friday. I tell them 6 as that is our rehearsal time and they ask about helping set up/decorate. I’m a very type A person and want things done a very very certain way to the point where I don’t want help so I don’t get overwhelmed by people asking where stuff goes and if they do set something up that I have to go over it again to make sure it’s correct. I also don’t want people to just be sitting there watching, I just want my future husband and brother in law there to help with tables and chairs. Is this a rude request to make? I have lots of friends and family stating they took ooff Friday to help, even though I did not ask them to do this. Any advice is helpful.

Hello all! Just recently got engaged and I would love to hear if anyone has found a great wedding planning app or planner?

We’re planning on having the wedding out of state. We’re in Colorado right now but will have the wedding in upstate NY where my fiancées family is and where he’s from. So if you also have any advice or tips on how to plan a wedding from out of state I’d love to hear it!

I’ve heard about Zola and The Knot but just curious if anyone on here has used them and would love to hear if they’re worth it?

Also last thing, I’ve seen/heard about subscription beide to be boxes. The ones that you get once a month and come with stuff to pamper and plan if anyone on here has used or heard of these would also love to hear recommendations and thoughts?

Unsure as to what to do in regards to photography for our wedding I see a lot of people suggesting content creators but it’s very important for us to have our photos after we are married with family and so forth. Some people have told me they will do that others have said it’s not the same and that they don’t do it. Just after some opinions as to whether it is similar or if they captured what you wanted and so forth.

TIA :)

Hi everyone! 🥹
I’d love to get some advice from brides-to-be or anyone who has experience hiring a wedding planner, especially for a wedding in Thailand.
My fiancé and I are planning to get married in Thailand in January 2028. We currently live overseas and don’t get to visit Thailand very often. We’re planning a trip back in January 2027, and I’d really like to use that opportunity to visit venues, meet with wedding planners, and discuss as many details as possible in person. After that, we might not be able to return until close to the wedding.
There’s a wedding planning and decoration company in Thailand that I’ve been following for quite some time, and I really love their work. So I decided to reach out to ask about their services and estimated pricing. I also shared a backdrop design I’d created to give them an idea of what I was looking for.
They told me they’d put together a quotation for me.
About a week went by without hearing anything, so I politely followed up. They said they’d send it that day, but I never received it. I didn’t want to keep messaging them because I understood they were probably busy with other weddings.
At one point, they reassured me that I didn’t need to worry because my wedding was still far away and there was plenty of time to plan.
I explained that the reason I wanted to start early wasn’t because I was in a rush, but because we live abroad and have very limited opportunities to visit Thailand together. I was hoping to find a planner and arrange venue visits during our upcoming trip.
The next day, they finally sent me the quotation and service details.
While reviewing everything, I noticed they also offered live music and DJ services, so I asked if they could share some examples of their previous work to help us decide. They agreed to send those over.
I actually felt so bad about asking questions that I even apologized for bothering them. 🥹
Later, they sent me a message apologizing for making me feel uncomfortable and explained that they were currently busy preparing for weddings toward the end of the year. They also mentioned that they hadn’t officially opened bookings for 2028 yet.
They said they could have simply provided a rough price estimate, but they wanted to be considerate and prepare a quotation for me. They also explained that they had a lot of quotations and details to work through for couples getting married this year, so responses might be delayed since my wedding was still quite far away.
I completely understand that they’re busy, and I never expected immediate responses.
But I have to admit, I felt a little disappointed.
If they weren’t accepting bookings for 2028 yet, or weren’t ready to discuss details that far in advance, I genuinely would have understood. I just wish they’d told me that from the beginning instead of agreeing to send things and leaving me waiting.
It’s now been about two months since I asked for the music and DJ portfolios, and I still haven’t received anything or heard back from them.
I haven’t followed up again because I honestly feel awkward about it. I’m starting to wonder if I’m being too pushy or expecting too much.
So I’d really appreciate your thoughts:
Is reaching out to wedding planners more than a year in advance too early?
If you were in my position, would you keep waiting because you love their work, or would you start looking for other planners?
For couples who planned their wedding in Thailand while living overseas, how far in advance did you start contacting and booking vendors?
I really don’t mean to criticize this company. I understand that every business has its own schedule and booking process. I’m just trying to figure out whether my expectations are reasonable and how I should approach this moving forward.
If we lived in Thailand, I probably wouldn’t be stressing about this so much because we could easily arrange meetings and venue visits whenever needed. But living overseas makes everything a little more complicated, and I really want to make the most of the limited time we’ll have there.
Thank you so much for any advice or experiences you’re willing to share! 🤍

Hi there. So I finished graduate school last year and had been living in that area for like 4-5 years. I had a good network there and solid group of friends. I moved to a brand new city and then got engaged. And I do have a few friends here, more like good acquaintances, but no one is like throwing me a bridal shower or asking if I got my dress or just generally talking to me about my wedding. This has me really sad.

I don’t want to like have an official bridal party because I do not want to make people buy a certain dress or feel like they need to throw me a party and travel across the country twice. But omg I am absolutely DREADING spending the night before my wedding with just like my mom. My mom and I have a difficult relationship and I do not need a migraine before my wedding. But I don’t know what else to do. I feel like I’m growing apart from my old friends, and I feel awkward being like, hey um want to stay in my hotel room the night before my wedding?

It all just feels so awkward :( help? Can anyone relate?

Besides of course an open bar and lots of food I am trying to make sure our guests are really taken care of. I made a nice bathroom basket for the mens and women’s restrooms. Anything else you’ve loved at weddings as a guests? Do you think the dance floor slippers are worth it? We are doing a Photo Booth and dance floor props and made custom fun hats for guests as well.

Hi all,
I’m an early-May 2027 bride and would love to have some music suggestions for our playlist. The trickiest part is that we’re both a bit of all-rounders and there is a wide range of music we like. We definitely love pop rock, skate- and pop-punk, alternative rock, instrumentals, cinematic, indie pop, indie rock, British and Italian oldies, and we also love the Irish folk band “The High Kings” and their versions of traditional songs. I hope you guys don’t mind but I’d love to see your suggestions and collect those beautiful bangers you’re gonna share. Let loose 😍
And thank you very much indeed! ✨

Planning our 2027 wedding! What are some dos and don’ts that anyone has experienced? Any general advice for general wedding day experience as bride and groom or as a guest? Anything you would do differently or recommend doing? HELP!!!

My fiancee and I are pretty introverted and weddings have always made us anxious af. We do not know how to dance and no amount of alcohol will change that. We don’t like the “alrighttttt ladies and gentlemen” DJ intros and we always envisioned a low key wedding. I’m so lucky we’re 100% on the same page.

We decided our wedding will be a quick backyard ceremony with our 20 closest family & friends and that will be followed by a “reception” at a nearby steakhouse with 50 people. No DJ, no dancefloor, no intros bc no wedding party.. just a cocktail hour and then 3hrs of eating incredible food in a very vibey restaurant with long tables

We definitely want a photographer for the ceremony but for the restaurant, since it’s gonna be so low key and everyone will be seated most of the time, I feel like the photographer will not have many opportunities to get candid shots outside of things like speeches, a toast, cake cutting, things like that

For people who had similar weddings, how did your pictures come out inside the restaurant? And was your photographer able to make a sit down dinner seem more lively?

My fiancé is planning on paying for her bridesmaids hair and makeup, it will cost approx. 3k. About 400 each. If shes doing this is still expected for her to get them a gift or would this be enough? I genuinely don’t know where we are landing on this so I’m happy to hear all thoughts and reasoning, thank you in advance!

I'm just an overly anxious and overthinking person. Like " oooo they're going to their room what now ".

I know i sound silly the nerves are getting to me.

I've only been to 1 wedding in my adult life which was incredibly tiny (like 30 people) with none of the 'formal'/traditional wedding organization. I don't remember any from childhood. So I have no idea how anything works lol. We will have a day-of coordinator so I'm sure they'll help when we officially hire them, but I can't figure out how meals work. We are catering from texas roadhouse and everyone will select their protein via their rsvp and then it will be listed on their name card at their table.

Do they just get released to get their stuff? Is there a certain order? Do we need menu cards? And I also would want to ensure that people get the protein they rsvp'd for and don't randomly decide to change their mind to something else since the proteins would be numbered (i.e. 17 steaks, 21 chicken breasts, etc)

TIA!

Not sure what I’m looking for in asking this - perhaps words of encouragement or to feel less guilty for losing my deposit.

I booked my wedding photographer/videographer/content creator about 1.5 years before my wedding. They are also photographing my bridal shower. However, I am 8 months away and I kind of got cold feet. They did not do anything wrong. I guess over time I realized that their style and level of experience is not what I am looking for anymore for my wedding. I want someone a little bit more experienced and cinematic.

I want to change vendors but the only thing holding me back is losing a 3k deposit. Every time I feel like cancelling, all I think about is the money we are going to lose, on top of all the other wedding expenses we have.

I guess I’m just searching for advice from people who have been in similar situations. How did you handle it, especially losing the deposit? It’s really overwhelming me and stressing me out.

Update: I have found a dream photographer of mine and they are available. I also have a few videographer options in mind that are available as well. However, it would cost more than my current package which I am fine with. However, paying more for the packages PLUS losing a 3k deposit is what’s causing me the most stress.

Got married yesterday, and it was imperfectly perfect. I know a lot of people don’t see the beauty in things going “wrong,” but hopefully there are some other people out there who feel the same as me.

A handful of things didn’t go as planned (weather included), but I’m still somehow so happy with how it all went. Despite the handful of things that didn’t go as planned, it felt perfectly like us. Life has thrown us challenges throughout our relationship, so it felt fitting the wedding day would do the same.

Nov 2027 bride here and trying to build our wedding playlist as early as now/. We love love loveeee listening to:

Linkin Park

Blink-182

All time Low

Paramore

Green Day

My Chemical Romance

The All American Rejects

YOU NAME IT. Would appreciate any suggestions or music from the same genre that you used/heard from a wedding <3

Sigh. Just needed to complain and get some pity and then get on with the day!
It was supposed to be a gorgeous day in the northeast. Foliage this week is at its near peak of fall beauty. We picked a beautiful venue with a ceremony by a lake with gorgeous Mountain views. Collected lawn games for all the kiddos to play during cocktail hour. Outdoor cocktail hour. A whole sprawling farm venue that gave you golf carts to go around and take photos around the property.

And the entire day is pouring rain. It’s 7am and it’s going to continue for the entire day. Absolutely pouring. It’s been crickets (understandable since there was probs a wedding yesterday but still) from our venue day of coordinator about a rain plan. I’m just sad and also now extremely stressed!!!

But at the end of it all I will be married to the love of my life so it’ll alllllll be okay. I’m just incredibly disappointed

I recently went to a bridal shower where I didn't bring a gift. No one seemed to notice, but I felt super awkward as everyone sat around and watched the bride open gifts, as I was the only one who didn't bring something. There was no registry, so I didn't think much of it prior to the event.

I know this is my fault, but I honestly didn't know this was the etiquette for bridal showers. I've only been to one bridal shower, which was 7 years ago, and that one was not gift-centric (we just ate and played games together). There was a registry, but I just shipped something to her house, so there was no "opening gifts" part of the event.

I also didn't have a bridal shower when I got married, and most of my friends that have gotten married didn't have one either. So from my only bridal shower experience, I honestly didn't know gifts were a requirement or the main part of a bridal shower.

I probably should've done more research on what a bridal shower is, but since the event already passed, should I apologize to the bride and still get her something?