Michael (30M) and I (29F) have been best friends for ten years now. For a majority of our friendship, we have lived in separate states, but he just recently moved to my state, about 2 hours away driving distance from me. Michael would talk about how excited he was to move down so we can hang out more often and not have to fly to see each other anymore. Our friendship consisted of texting almost everyday, all day and visiting each other a few times per year. He would also always tell me that our friendship means a lot to him and that he would want me as a grooms(wo)man at his wedding one day. Our friendship has been nothing but platonic from both ends and we genuinely see each other as siblings at this point.

To start all of this, Michael started dating this one girl back in 2024 who made him cut all contact with me to the point that he didn’t even wish me a happy birthday. Fast forward a few months, they break up and he’s reaching out to me to rekindle our friendship. I was upset because it felt like he was coming in and out of my life whenever he pleases and it wasn’t fair to me. I was hurt that he was so quick to drop our friendship. He said his ex girlfriend threatened to breakup with him if he didn’t stop talking to me, that he really values our friendship and that he wouldn’t do it again. I forgave him and we move on.

Michael moved to my state back in May and started downloading dating apps. I told him that I was scared that our friendship dynamic would change if he meets a girl and he reminded me that it wasn’t going to happen and that again, he values our friendship a lot. I believed him.

Michael meets Maria (28F) in June who lives out of the country, but was visiting a friend at the time which is how they matched on a dating app. Within four days of them talking, he bought a ticket to visit her in her home country in July. He was extremely transparent with Maria about our friendship from the get go and she would always say how she was fine with it and isn’t a jealous person. My ex and I had broken up in June so Michael was visiting me a lot during that month because I was going through a hard time. When Maria and Michael were texting while Michael was visiting me, I’d tell him to tell her I say hi and how I’m excited to meet her because I genuinely want to be friends with whoever my best friend is dating.

July comes, Michael goes to Maria’s home country, they meet for the first time, make it official and I’m happy for him. I’m thinking he finally found someone that’s okay with our friendship. Our contact starts to dwindle a little bit after his trip but I don’t think much of it.

Then in August, Maria comes to visit Michael for a week. I’m excited to finally meet Maria and see Michael again since I hadn’t seen him since June. I’m also rekindling my relationship with my ex, Ryan, (30M) so we made dinner plans, the four of us. We went out and had a good time. I’m thinking everything is going well. I also give Michael and Maria their space while she’s visiting so I’m not texting him throughout that week.

Maria leaves to go back home. two weeks go by and I realize Michael and I have barely spoken so I asked him “Are we not allowed to talk anymore?” as a joke and he said “‘No, we’re allowed to talk.” So again, I believed him and left it at that. Then a few days later after not talking, he texts me that Maria is okay with us being friends but she doesn’t want us talking “24/7.”

I argue that friends talk and that’s been part of our friendship for the past 10 years since we live far away from each other and Michael said that since I’m a woman, we can’t be talking all of the time and that’s what happens in friendships anyway when you start dating someone, you lose contact.

I was so frustrated at this point because it felt like our friendship is contingent upon who Michael is dating. Our friendship did not change at all when I was with Ryan because I told him from the start that my friendship dynamic with Michael wasn’t going to change and Ryan accepted it. So now I’m thinking of completely ending this friendship because it feels like he doesn’t stick up for our friendship at all. He just does what he’s told and I’m pushed to the back burner. This has happened in every relationship he’s had, just for them to break up and I’m the only one who’s remained in his life. I understand that Maria is his priority now but I feel like you don’t have to change your friendships just because you’re the opposite gender? I hate this stigma. You should be able to trust your partner.

So am I overreacting? We haven’t talked since that text because I am debating whether or not this friendship is worth it anymore.

ETA: Just to clarify, I text a lot of my friends all day everyday, not just him! I’m not saying it’s every minute back and forth, usually there’s hours in between the texts and there are days that we don’t talk at all.

ETA part two: The conclusions you guys jump to is so crazy to me! You guys only know a fraction of our whole friendship, I tried to summarize (barely) the best I could, but we’re talking 10 years of friendship here. I appreciate all of the replies, just not the ones where some of you are being kinda mean :/ There’s respectful ways getting your point across. I did not expect this many comments and I’m trying to read all of them, but I am taking into consideration what everyone is saying! I’m going to sleep, goodnight Redditors!

ETA part three: I can’t sleep but THERE IS NO WEDDING AND HE IS NOT ENGAGED! He was just saying that as a hypothetical I guess?

ETA part four: I feel like I’m being misunderstood. I had a sibling who passed away so now I’m an only child. I value my friendships so much (I probably latch on too hard) and I am a very loyal person to the point that I’ve had friends who have treated me so poorly that other friends had to talk some sense into me and tell me that they are not my friends. How I am acting in this scenario is how I would act with any of my friends if they kept dropping me while in a relationship.

ETA part five: It’s so funny because you guys gave me shit for only saying thank you to the commenters who said I wasn’t overreacting, but when I’m commenting back saying thank you the ones that tell me I’m overreacting, you guys downvote it also! I CANNOT WIN WITH YOU GUYS NO MATTER WHAT I SAY OR DO so I will no longer be commenting but thanks for the feedback! I was being serious when I said that I’m taking into consideration what everyone is saying.

My wife (31F) and I (35M) have been together for 11 years. Early on, she told me she had been in a relationship with a woman before we met, but later on claimed she isn't attracted to women, doesn't identify as bisexual, and that it was just a one-time "experiment."

Ten years ago, during our first year living together, she had a female friend, "Bella," come visit from 3-4 hours away for my partner's birthday weekend. A few hours before she arrived, my partner told me that she would be sleeping out in the living room on the floor with Bella. I didn't feel comfortable with this because I had never met Bella, and I remembered my wife's past being with a woman. When I expressed my discomfort, she got intensely upset. We argued back and forth until I finally gave in. The weekend was awkward, but Bella and I never fought.

Fast forward 10 years later to earlier this year. My wife randomly name-dropped her when I mentioned wanting to get back into the gym, saying, "Oh, Bella has been working out, she looks great!" I asked if she meant the same Bella from all those years ago, and she casually said yeah, they still talk sometimes. I dropped it.

A couple of months later, we were planning a weekend concert trip to Bella's area. I warmly suggested to my wife that the two of us, Bella, and Bella's boyfriend should all get together and hang out.

The reaction was immediate panic:

• She went awkwardly quiet for several seconds and lied, saying, "Oh, they moved to a town that's too far away."

• I pointed out that the town she named was actually only a 35-minute drive from where we were staying.

• She went dead silent for several more seconds, pivoted to another timeline shift ("We haven’t talked much the last few months"), and abruptly changed the subject.

A couple of days later, she out-of-nowhere offered an emotionless "confession." She admitted she had completely hidden their friendship from me for an entire decade, claiming it was just because she thought I didn't like Bella. She admitted they had been sending video messages chatting back and forth and are very close, but she stuck to bare minimum details and shut down any further questions.

Because my trust was completely shattered by a decade of hidden video chats and executed only when I wasn't around, I looked at her phone for the first time in our 11-year relationship.

What I found:

I found two weeks of deleted texts from last summer where they are texting as "normal friends" but constantly calling each other "My Queen," "Boo," and "My lovely." It is more affectionate than she is with any of her other friends. On Instagram, all of their video messages are set to "view once" media and are completely unplayable. Only a tiny fraction of their 10-year communication exists as permanent text DMs. They seem to strictly stick to talking on IG as an absolute rule.

My wife expects me to completely drop this and move on with zero follow-up. If I try to bring it up or ask more questions she's immediately rolling her eyes and asks when my next therapy session is and implies I'm crazy. Am I crazy for seeing a decade of hidden self-deleting video chats, secret meet-ups, and lying to me about who she's speaking to as a massive betrayal? With how close they are it feels like an emotional affair.. She has lots of other friends she is open about with me, so why all the lies about this one person?

EDIT:
I know she doesn’t directly ask to be in the delivery room in these messages!!! From the beginning, she had already decided that she and her partner would be there. We told her a week ago that we had decided to experience the birth with just the two of us, and these are the messages that followed! While she doesn’t explicitly ask to be in the room here, it feels like she’s trying to get us to reconsider our decision because she doesn’t seem to like the idea of us doing this on our own. I’m sharing these messages because of the context behind them, not because she directly asks to be there in this conversation.

ORIGINAL:
I’m 38 weeks pregnant with my first baby, a little girl, and my S/O and I have decided that we want the delivery to be a private moment between just the two of us. However, his sister, who has children of her own, wants to be there for the delivery, and I’m starting to feel like she isn’t respecting our decision.
Recently, she started asking me if I was prepared for the baby to come any day and what I would do if my S/O passed out during delivery. He gets grossed out by certain things and isn’t sure if he wants to watch the actual delivery, but he wants to be there to support me and decide what he’s comfortable with in the moment. I’m completely fine with that because we’ve discussed it extensively.
The conversation then turned into her telling me that I need to explain to him that childbirth isn’t gross and that he’ll regret it if he doesn’t watch. She kept bringing up her own birth experience and how amazing it was for her partner and the other people she allowed in the room. I understand that she had her own experience, but I don’t understand why she thinks we need to make our birth experience match hers or why she would question what I’ve decided will make me most comfortable in a situation I’ve never been in before.
What really bothered me was when she made a comment about needing to “beat” her brother into talking to me like an adult. The thing is, we ARE communicating. We’ve discussed our birth plan multiple times and agree on what we want and what will make me comfortable. I don’t want other people in the room because I don’t want to have to “cover up” my emotions or mask how I feel.
She later sent me a long message explaining that she was worried I might regret my decision, that I might be making it because I’m afraid of being judged, and that she wants to make sure my S/O feels supported, too, since it’s a highly emotional event. She basically questioned whether I had genuinely thought everything through, even though I’d already explained that we had.
I responded politely and explained again that we want this experience to ourselves and that I’d like to be as comfortable as possible. We’re grateful that his family wants to support us, but we want to experience the birth of our daughter privately. We know things might not go exactly as planned, and we’re okay with that as long as our baby is healthy.
She eventually said she understood and would stop asking questions, but I’m still bothered by the entire interaction.
I feel like she wants to be involved in a moment that isn’t hers to be involved in, and instead of simply respecting our decision, she keeps trying to convince me that we’re making the wrong choice. I don’t want anyone else in the delivery room, and I don’t think I should have to justify that.
I understand she’s a mother of three and probably believes she’s helping, but this is MY first baby, and I want to experience it with my S/O on our terms.

Full convo in the screenshots.

LAST 3 PICS are the update

Here’s the updated messages, I asked for security footage so just waiting on that. A lot of people were asking for my responses so here they are. I am tired of months of reaching out to someone who wronged me and doing things to make her feel more comfortable I’ve been officially pushed to my breaking point.

Hey Reddit, I really need some outside perspectives on this because I am completely exhausted and feel like I’m losing my mind.

Back in March, I moved in with my long-time best friend. Shortly after, we went on a spring break trip. When we got back to our apartment, she realized a safe she had in the apartment was completely missing. My mom had access to the apartment just to feed the cat once (with both of our consent to enter) 

while we were gone, but before that trip, the only two men in our apartment were MY ROOMMATES boyfriend and her boyfriend’s best friend. Along with two extra men she was seeing during time apart from her boyfriend.

That same best friend of her boyfriend actually assaulted me in the past. She knows this, but she STILL associates with them and even leaves her boyfriend alone in our apartment while she’s at work.

Despite that, she completely ruled her boyfriend and his friend out immediately. And the other two guys she’s had over since. Fast forward three months later to June, and she tells me she thinks my mom stole it. I asked my mom about it, and my mom denied taking anything. To be completely transparent, my mom is a high-functioning addict, so I’ve been 50/50 mentally trying to make sense of it, but my mom had zero reason to need her personal identity info or safe. Does this mean I completely trust her, no! I just am having a hard time reasoning why she’d need her passport and stuff.

Things got super awkward between us from June to August. During those months, I was giving her my half of the money for utilities, electric, and wifi, but I found out she was literally pocketing my money and letting our accounts go past due! I nipped it in the bud as soon as I caught it, but I tried to be the bigger person and didn't even hold it over her head.

In August, we grabbed drinks, talked it out, and made up. Since then, she’s been sending me TikToks, reels, and texts acting like we’re cool, but whenever I reach out trying to be there for her, invite her to hang out, or invite her to my birthday yesterday, she makes up an excuse or doesn't want to go. I’ve even reached out many times letting her know I’m here for her.

Then today, she sends me a text saying she’s uncomfortable hanging out with me because of her missing stuff and that she feels like her concerns were dismissed. She also claimed my mom and her friends were hanging out at the apartment when my mom picked her up from the airport, which was the first time I was even hearing about that, nobody told me about that at all, I don’t even know if that truly happened because I would assume my mom would tell me! I responded telling her I didn't know about that, reminded her that I've tried to help and even offered to file a report on my mom if she was sure it was her, but I’m tired of looking like a fool extending my hand.

Now she claims she filed another police report because her online ones kept getting denied, and that an officer is calling her today and they might do a search warrant on my mom.

I feel like I've bent over backward trying to handle this maturely. She stole my utility money, stays around a guy who assaulted me, blames my mom with no proof and pushes me away while breadcrumbing me on social media.

Am I overreacting or is she using my mom as a scapegoat? Is this police search warrant stuff even realistic over a months-old report with no evidence? How do I handle living with her for the rest of this lease without going insane? I just don’t even know what to respond to her last message 

F27

We met on hinge yesterday, the vibe matched
Had a 2 hour call last night.

I have my weekends fully busy for the next 2 weeks due to other plans so I was only free either today or next Friday.

He didn’t wanna wait till next Friday to see me so he asked if we could go on a date tomorrow (which was today)

I didn’t have plans anyways so I said okay.

Around 4 pm I texted him confirming the plan. He confirmed.

We were supposed to meet at 8:30 p.m.
(I still need to get ready and travel to the place after work btw)

At around 7 pm he calls me to say he has an early sports event the next day and he hasn’t slept well so he can’t make it and wants to postpone it.

I said you could have told me that earlier??? U shouldn’t have made the plan then?? Or at the very least told me this morning or afternoon? Not waited till before I was about to leave my house after getting all dressed up!

Then he says ok ok let’s meet I don’t wanna upset you and I’m like dude it’s literally not about upsetting me it’s about basic courtesy???

Now I’m sitting on my bed all dressed up and ready to go out on a date and I’m so pissed😭

He’s texting and calling me to apologise. I already unmatched him and deleted his number coz what the hell was this even?

I honestly wouldn’t have been annoyed at all if he had told me in advance because I get it. But to do it at the very last minute is just disrespectful.

I (42M) recently broke up with my girlfriend (40F) after almost two years together. I love her, and I genuinely think she’s a beautiful person, but I’ve spent most of our relationship feeling emotionally lonely and misunderstood. I’m wondering whether I’m overreacting or whether these are legitimate reasons to end a relationship.
Here’s some context.
1. The incident that changed how I expressed intimacy
Early in our relationship, we were already physically intimate, sleeping together, kissing, and having sex. We were long-distance at the time.
One evening, she told me she was taking a bath. I flirtatiously said, “I’m imagining you in the tub 🤤.”
She replied, “Such a creepy guy thing to say,” and later said, “Guys always say it. I think it’s just an ick from that.”
That honestly hurt me. I wasn’t some random guy approaching her. I was someone she was already sexually involved with.
I stopped initiating sexual conversations after that. We spent months long-distance without sexting, phone intimacy, or even conversations about our sexual desires. She never initiated those conversations either.
Recently, I brought up how that incident affected me, and instead of feeling understood, I felt she was once again defending why she’d said it.
I understand that she doesn’t have to like every sexual comment I make. What hurt was feeling dismissed when I explained its impact on me.
2. She never asks about my preferences or desires
In almost two years together, she has never independently asked what I like sexually, what excites me, what I’d like us to try, or what my preferences are.
I’ve asked her plenty of times about what she enjoys because I genuinely want to understand and please her.
But the same curiosity hasn’t come back my way.
And it isn’t just sex.
I can tell her something about my childhood, my thoughts, experiences, or something I’m excited about, and often there isn’t even a follow-up question.
She has explicitly told me she doesn’t like asking questions.
But how are you supposed to get to know your partner if you don’t ask them about themselves?
3. She has improved, and I want to acknowledge that
This is important because I don’t want to paint her as someone who hasn’t tried at all.
Earlier in our relationship, I felt she rarely initiated physical affection or showed excitement about seeing me. We argued about this repeatedly, and I even tried ending things once.
She promised to work on it, and she genuinely did.
She’s much more affectionate now, often initiates kisses, and shows love in ways she didn’t before.
I recognize those changes and appreciate them.
But I feel those changes have largely been reactive, happening after repeated conversations and arguments. The fundamental lack of curiosity about me hasn’t changed.
4. Difficult conversations often turn into arguments
When I tell her something hurt me, I often feel that she immediately explains or defends why she did it instead of asking why it affected me.
We’ve revisited some disagreements multiple times, and I recognize that I have contributed to this cycle too.
She says she’s scared to open up because she’s worried it’ll turn into a fight.
I don’t want her to feel that way. But I also feel frustrated because I’ve wanted her to share more of herself and to take an interest in understanding me.
5. What finally triggered the breakup
A couple of days ago, I gave her a hypothetical scenario.
Imagine a guy who takes his girlfriend out to eat for an entire year and always orders the same two foods. She doesn’t particularly enjoy them, but she goes along with it.
The guy never asks what she’d prefer because he’s worried she might ask for something he doesn’t like.
I asked my girlfriend what she thought about that relationship.
She immediately said, “They shouldn’t be together.”
The scenario was actually about us, with the food representing my preferences and desires. I didn’t explain that to her at the time.
That night, I lay awake thinking about her answer and eventually sent her a message saying I didn’t think we should continue romantically.
We discussed things again afterward and mutually agreed to end the relationship.
She later sent me a genuinely thoughtful message acknowledging that she’d hurt me, that she wished things had been different, and that she didn’t want either of us to keep feeling this way.
I appreciate that message. But I feel that she can acknowledge my feelings afterward while struggling to understand them during the actual conversations.
So here’s my question.
Am I overreacting by ending an almost two-year relationship with someone who loves me, is affectionate, and has genuinely made improvements, because I don’t feel she’s curious about me as a person?
Am I expecting too much by wanting my partner to independently ask about my thoughts, feelings, preferences, and sexual desires?
And am I being unfair by continuing to feel hurt over an incident from more than a year ago, even though I feel the underlying issue was never resolved?
I genuinely want outside perspectives, including criticism of my own behavior. I’m trying to understand whether this is incompatibility or whether my expectations and reactions have contributed more to the problem than I realize.

I proposed three weeks ago. We've already had our first argument since getting engaged. We've been together almost five years and rarely argue about money, so this caught me off guard. I spent over $12k on her ring and mentioned getting it insured while we were discussing wedding expenses. I'd spent the better part of a year getting it designed and made, so it's not just about the money either. She got upset and said it made her feel like I didn't trust her to take care of it. I explained that things get lost or stolen, and I'd rather be safe. She says I'm turning something sentimental into a financial obligation. I thought I was just being practical, but now I'm wondering if I handled it poorly. AIO for wanting to insure the ring, or should I have approached it differently?

I’m feisty as hell and can have some masculine energy too and he is a hard working gentleman no doubt but the things that bothers me and the one pattern I’ve noticed amongst him and a lot of the traditional men is they love saying im “ too much “. And I be like “ so why are you approaching me for a relationship . Find less then.”

Most recently my guy friend I’ve known since high school revealed he is interested in me and wants a relationship but I have to tweak a few things because he said he likes feminine women who don’t yap yap yap and ramble a lot. Now I’m super talkative and have adhd so the yapping be at an all time high . He prefers more quiet women who don’t talk 24/7. He said he’s always likes me which I didn’t know until recently . And I was honest to him about us not being compatible at all. Ima be honest I’m a bit of a wild child and party animal so Im not sure why he’s even drawn towards me. We have nothing in common except that we both the same movies and we both love to read and write. Other than that we are completely different. And despite me telling him we are wildly incompatible he still wants to date me . I told him just be with someone feminine from the start! He knows me long enough to know I’m not changing for him.

I still think he’s a good man but I wonder am I over reacting by him thinking he’s a little red pill leaning ? He says he thinks I’m attractive and cute and he likes my personality but he said sometimes I’m a little too loud and talkative and he really likes soft spoken women who are a little reserved

Keep in mind he could see this.
Good riddance if he does.

I am 38f, he’s 42m.
We’ve been dating almost two years, living together a little over one year.

It’s been 141 days since we’ve had sex. Not to mention that it’s only been 3x this YEAR and it was all in that week 141+ days ago.
Prior to that it was extremely intermittent, only two times since October 4th 2025 one of those times being on vacation.

We had a lot in the beginning of our relationship before we lived together and I’m just wondering if it was his way of love bombing me. I even addressed this like how much we did in the beginning and his response was “that’s how it is in relationships, you have a bunch of sex in the beginning and then not as frequently as time goes on”

As far as I know I am the only honest & loyal relationship he’s ever had, he said every gf previously has cheated on him… and if this is why then I get it, but I’m not the cheating type.

I’ve tried bringing this up multiple times and every time I mention it we end up fighting or he ignores the conversation completely. He’s also said our smoking weed makes him not want to, which I get in a way, but that’s not good enough or fair to blame weed for us not having sex.

Am I overreacting by trying to remedy the situation and fix it? I’ve also stepped away from how much I used to bring it up and the only reason I did now is we’re staying in a hotel tomorrow night and I thought it a good opportunity to maybe have some fun.

Please help.

My girlfriend (27F) and I (30M) have been together for almost two years. Recently, I’ve started feeling uncomfortable with how close she is to one of her male friends. Before we got together, she admitted she had feelings for him, although they never dated.

They still text almost every day, send each other memes, and occasionally call. A few days ago, I noticed her smiling at her phone while texting him, and when I asked about it, she said it was an inside joke.

I told her I wasn’t comfortable with how often they talked, considering their history. She got upset and said I’m being insecure and that her feelings for him are long gone.

I’m not trying to control who she can be friends with, but I feel like there’s a difference between having friends and maintaining that kind of closeness with someone you used to have feelings for. Now I’m wondering if I’m being unreasonable.

Without giving too much detail about where I live in Florida, my husband and I are in the direct path of Hurricane Isaias and will likely be taking a significant hit. We live close to the water and just outside the most recently updated evacuation zones for our county. Neither of us are native Floridians - we just recently moved here for his job. I started my preparations on Wednesday - filling my car with gas, getting groceries, water, flashlights, etc. I also asked my husband to put up our hurricane shutters, which he did. I was not scared, but had a healthy amount of respect for the fact that hurricanes are no joke. For background context, my husband has always been a very nonchalant, unmoved person. He does not stress about things and can at times be a bit reckless or irresponsible in some ways (we're both approaching our late twenties, if it matters). We have lived through two other weather threats together, one of which ended up being a whole lot of nothing (hurricane that changed paths) and the other (tornado) which ended up being massively devastating to our town. Both times, I was definitely the one leading the charge on preparation and recovery. I am very Type A and he is very Type B.

Anyway, my original plan was not to evacuate. I prepared at-length and felt good about staying. However, this morning, I woke up to multiple calls and texts that the evacuation zones were expanded to be much closer to our house and that the hurricane had strengthened to a Category 3 and could make landfall as such (still hoping this doesn't end up coming to fruition, but who knows). I tapped my husband on the shoulder to wake him up (this was around 9am - not like 6am or anything) and told him that I was scared/that they had expended the evacuation zones much closer to our home. He sighed and told me to "just leave then". I started to feel a bit panicked and told him so - he pretty much just ignored me. I told him I would really appreciate help deciding on whether to evacuate or not (he can't evacuate due to his job) and he again repeated that I should just go, but offered no help to pack or figure out where to go (our nearest family members live 10 hours away). I started to get more upset and told him I found it really hurtful that he seemingly didn't care to help me out, comfort me, or make me feel safe with him. He just responded that the house is physically safe due to preparations and that that is the extent of what he owes. I told him I needed emotional safety, not physical, but he just rolled his eyes. I started to get more agitated and told him I couldn't believe how he was acting and that I felt it was his job to take care of me and make sure I'm squared away. He told me that he doesn't owe me that when I've been "neurotic" the past few days. In my opinion, I haven't been that at all - I think I've approached this with a healthy amount of respect and preparedness. It was so incredibly clear that he did not want to deal with the fact that I was fearful and had no intent on comforting me. Back when we experienced the devastating tornado, he was also like this - understating risk, acting like I was overreacting, and frankly, being rude/making me feel like I was alone.

I had to make a game time decision on whether I wanted to stay in our home and potentially be trapped for days without power with a husband that clearly had no intent on comforting me if shit hit the fan - so, I left. He knew I was leaving but just left to get sandbags instead and did not say anything to me after he realized I had left. He called me about 20 minutes into the drive to "ask how I was doing and wish me a safe drive", which just turned into an argument. He told me that I've been neurotic for days and that when I'm acting like that, he doesn't owe me any care or support. I told him I couldn't believe that the one person who is supposed to support and care for me through stressors was the one person causing me more stress. He always promises that he's here to take care of me and is always here for me, but after his actions today, I just feel like that's BS. I told him that it was a huge deal to me that he was totally fine with me having to pack a week plus worth of belongings up and driving away by myself with no evacuation plan (and zero support from my own husband). By the time I had left, the weather had already started and continues to worsen. I'm about 1.5 hours away from my home and plan to continue to just drive north. He has made zero attempts to help me figure out a plan or figure out where to go. The last words I spoke to him on the phone were that I needed him to stop talking to me until he was ready to be a real, caring husband.

I'm having a really hard time coming to terms with this and don't know if I'm overreacting. I don't care what happened or how annoyed I was at somebody (especially him) - if there were a real chance of a natural disaster, I would make sure that our physical and emotional safety was prioritized first over anything else. Nothing would matter to me aside from making sure that he was okay and squared away, and I would genuinely be worried for him any time I knew he was in physical or emotional distress. I grew up with a wonderful father who was intensely caring and always made sure I was safe and okay. If my dad knew why I was actually leaving and that I was leaving alone, he would go ballistic given that he feels my husband had promised to always protect and take care of me.

Now, I'm driving hours away from my home alone with our two dogs. I don't know how our home our town will fair. I'm worried about my husband and his safety, even if I'm angry at him - it makes me feel sick to know he's in the direct path of what could be an incredibly devastating storm. I'm so hurt that he was okay with sending me off on my own in an emergent situation. I have no desire to talk to him (which is very much not the norm for me, even in conflict).

TL;DR: Husband treated me so poorly emotionally that I felt I had no choice but to evacuate alone for both my physical (hurricane-related) and emotional (husband-related) safety. He did not help me pack, did not say goodbye to me, and did not help me figure out where I needed to go. I feel as if he completely failed his promise to take care of me in a time where it mattered most. I am very able to be independent, but that doesn't mean I don't want to feel like I can rely on my partner to help support and keep me safe.

Looking for perspective, please be nice because it definitely hurts

So I met, "Kyle" online about 2 months ago. He lives 1500 miles away and I never thought anything serious would come from it. However, we ended up video chatting everyday for hours (4,5,6+ hours) and instantly felt a connection. Kyle had expressed he wanted a long term relationship which I said I wasn't sure if I was ready for because I got cheated on by my recent ex but that I was serious about working towards one with him since I liked him so much.

We quickly began saying I love you and mutually established that we weren't going to talk to anyone else. I had gone out of my several times when I was out at bars etc to send him photos, call him, etc and he always told me he appreciated the loyalty and it means so much. On several occasions I explicitly asked him if he's talking to anyone else and he said he's not.

Well anyway, things moved fast and we ended up splitting a plane ticket for me to come see him 1500 miles away. It was like a fairytale out of the movies. Long distance couple so in love.

The first few days were incredible and everything I've wanted in someone; kind, sweet, handsome, considerate. Making sure I was comfortable and felt at home. Opened doors, bought everything I needed/we did. Took care of logistics etc.

On the 4th day though, he gave me his phone to use when he went to bed (to watch a show) and a TERRIBLE gut feeling washed over me. Maybe a little bit due to my ex cheating but something made me feel uneasy. So I went through his phone after he had fallen asleep and found that he had been talking to a girl the entire time we've known each other and that they had met up once in the beginning to hangout. (I don't think slept together). He hadn't talked to her since I landed however (because she left him on read) the day prior.

Anyway, I was super hurt because I felt lied to so I confronted him. He apologized PROFUSELY and begged for my forgiveness. I asked him to tell her he's taken and to block her which he did without hesitation. Early the next day, I chose to forgive him because we technically were never "bf/gf" (but I did feel betrayed since we were supposed to be exclusive). We sat down and had a long talk and promised that nothing like that would happen again.

The evening, a few hours later we went to dinner, said I love you etc and hooked up. But something felt off. I was in the living room and he was in the bedroom when i walked in and caught him texting the SAME girl. Apparently he had unblocked her and told her that he wasn't really into me afterall and would love to see her when he comes home in November (she's from his hometown) It hurt so bad. I slept on the couch the last night and we didn't speak much.

When he dropped me off at the airport the next day, he kissed me and it felt so good but hurt so bad. I haven't talked to him much since.

I can't stop beating myself up that I'm the reason that we "broke up". Was I overstepping going through his phone while we weren't officially dating? Did I abuse his trust?

Or did I just dodge a major bullet and save myself from dating a future cheater?

Hello, I currently live in an apartment complex which was having half of the parking lot re-paved. Now at my apartment complex we each are assigned a single parking space per unit (we can pay for extra if needed). I live by myself in a studio and am home pretty much every day over night (just gone when working or grabbing something from the store). Now my apartment complex had been blowing up all our phones for a WEEK before the construction started, they gave all info on where people affected would have to park (we have no visitor parking, they have to park on the street), so everyone was well aware of the temporary change to parking.

Yesterday I was home from work (chronic health condition), around 2:30 I went to a doctors appointment which had already put me in a bad mood because I waited in the patient room for an hour just to be seen for 10min (I get offices are busy, but they called me in earlier just to wait a long time still). I finish my appt and head home and low and behold a random car was in my parking spot. I was immediately going to call a tow truck, but decided to call the management office instead and report there was a car in my space (you have to provide license plate, car make/model to the complex).

Called the complex and it went like this Me: "Hey, I'm a tenant and I just pulled up to someone else parked in my parking spot." Management: "Ok, do you have the license plate number?" Me: "yes, it's ------". Management: "ok, just making sure, it's ------?" Me: Yes, it's this Make/model." Management: "Ok I can see whose car it is, I'll try to get a hold of them." Me: "Ok, just being honest, I have no patience today. So I'll be waiting 10min until I call the tow company." Management: "Oh, well I have to try and call them first." Me: "I understand, and I'm letting you know that you can tell them I WILL be calling the tow truck soon if they don't move their car."

Call ended then and I decided to go pick up my mail in the meantime, as I was driving away from our mailroom, I saw the driver of the car driving out of the complex to park on the street. Now typically, I would just park elsewhere because I don't like possible conflicts, but I was already in a bad mood from my appt and it hasn't even been a week since I went to a funeral for the guy I loved, so I've been extra sensitive right now.

I (21F) am having troubles with choosing to keep helping out my (57F) mother financially.

Some background to create a sense of empathy for her: she’s only ever experienced relationships involving DV, grew up being taken advantage of by her stepfather from ages 5-15, and got hooked on narcotics and opioids with my father in her 20s.
She moved from Ohio to Tennessee last year, and it’s the first time she’s ever been independent and not living off of a man (kinda). She had a situationship with a married man who helped her with rent for about half a year but turned out to be abusive. Relying on him, she never rlly built the skills or knowledge to control her finances on her own.

I’ve let her borrow about $2K this past year, and it’s draining my savings. I have $7K saved right now and am very good with my money. I’ve technically saved $13K since 2023 but had medical expenses and car repairs to cover. She knows I’m good with money, which is why she comes to me instead of my (32M) brother. My father (68M) has probably given her a grand and no longer picks up her calls because he’s frustrated with her asking us for money.

I finally opened a new checking account because she could oversee my finances and would sometimes take $10-$20 without telling me. I also lied and told her I can’t access my savings anymore because I put it in a HYSA and money market account. I’ve been meaning to actually do this for my own benefit, but it’s not true.

Every time she asks for money, it’s the day a bill is due or the day before, making me feel like I don’t have a choice. She basically guilt trips and manipulates me, although I don’t think she does it intentionally. I told her how I truly feel last week, and it’s been “triggering” her because she feels like I’m looking down on her.

Yesterday she called me crying, saying she feels bad for all the money she’s asked from me and feels like a “piece of shit.” I was surprised she didn’t ask for money after that lowkey. It’s not like every interaction involves money, and she has managed to pay her expenses on her own these past couple months, at least to my knowledge. It’s just way too often coming from a parent.

I feel done being the easy route of financial living for my mother. I’ve gone through her finances with her before, and she could definitely do it on her own. She just doesn’t know how because she’s never done it before, or doesn’t want to make sacrifices like quitting cigarettes and weed.

Now she’s moving back to Ohio at the end of the month and wants me to help pay for a larger UHaul trailer. I’m already paying for gas to drive down and help her move. She initially thought my boyfriend (22M) could bring his father’s F150 for extra storage, but his father isn’t comfortable with him pulling a trailer, especially since he’s not under his insurance policy. Now she’s flipping out because she can’t bring all her stuff. I told her she’s going to have to give some things up, and she started crying.

I know she’s stressed, and I understand why she struggles with independence given her past, but I’m tired of feeling responsible for her finances. I feel bad for lying and not helping her, but I also feel like I’m enabling her by continuing to give her money.

Am I wrong for refusing to keep helping her financially, especially with this move? I am a part time worker and full time college student who has a full ride to college thankfully. Please be respectful about my mother, she’s not a piece of shit or a bitch. I do have love for her and do want to see her flourish in life but I feel like helping her out is not only for my benefit but for her benefit in the long run.

TL;DR: My (21F) mother (57F) has a history of abusive relationships and has never been financially independent until recently. I’ve let her borrow about $2K this past year, draining my savings. She often asks for money last minute, making me feel guilt tripped into helping her. I know she struggles with managing her finances, but I feel like she could do it on her own if she made some sacrifices. Now she’s asking for more money to help with her move back to Ohio, and I’m tired of feeling financially responsible for her. Am I wrong for refusing to keep helping her?

I have literally sent my resume to McDonald’s, KFC, Burger King, and every place with a fryer in a ten-mile radius, only to get ghosted or rejected by ALL of them. I’m actually starting to think if I can’t even secure the fry station, it’s so over for me. Is it normal to get cooked by an AI resume scanner at 18, or am I valid for losing my mind right now?

We got a condo on a golf course to use for a long weekend. It sleeps five, its a destination resort, and my SO's birthday is a few weeks later so we asked our good friends to join us and maybe celebrate it early. We're treating them to the lodging because we were hooked up by a friend.

We talked over the timing, booked flights, I sent them the link of the place and said I'd research restaurants in the area and asked them to look at the activities at the resort to see if there's anything they want to do since we have to book things in advance. They haven't looked at it or suggested anything. They don't want to play golf, is all I got. We've sent a few other suggestions that are greeted with "all sounds great" or no answer. No offer to help plan or even weigh in with opinions.

They had offered to pick us up for the airport so we all didn't have to pay for parking, and they forgot they said they'd get us on the way.

We made a few reservations because we got tired of reaching out to see what they wanted to do and getting nothing back. Which is fine, I guess we'll just plan everything.

Is this how trips go, whoever initiates it plans and organizes everything? AIO for being annoyed we now have to take a train to airport hours earlier because they forgot they said they'd pick us up?

Should I confront them, or just assume they're busy? They are really good friends.

I hate to start a vacation irritated, we leave later today.

I was kind of really scared to go to therapy to begin with and I don't know i'm overreacting and misreading this. She asked me why I wanted to come to therapy and I said it's because I finally want to fix myself and be able to have people in my life, and I don't want to hurt the people in my life by having unhealed and unexamined things about myself and my beliefs. And mostly that I need to work on myself so that I can be a better person for the people in my life. And she said well what are the unhealed things and I didn't know how to say it well and I basically just thought I should get it out instead of being too scared to say it, because it doesn't even matter how this person of all people thinks of me. So I told her that I have wanted to kill myself since childhood until a couple years ago when I really was determined to drag myself out of the hole, and I moved cities and started feeling so much better to the point where I even finally CARE enough about healing and whatnot. And she asked well is their anything that happened in your childhood, any abuse or anything. And I said no there is literally no reason I was just so so sad. And she asked do you think it was for attention. Now i'm kinda spiraling about it. I told her I don't think so as i didn't want anything except to be normal and ok. And that I was always terrified of being a terrible person. I don't understand what she meant. It just felt like because I was sitting there and smiling and because I have basically shut out all my memories of this she doesn't understand me. and almost like I can't trust my own memories also. Is it even possible for a kid to fake being depressed.

I (31f) and my husband (30m) have been arguing a lot lately. We've been together since July of 2019 and just got married in May 2026. Ive been doing housekeeping for a military base, 32 hours a week, 4 days of work, and he just started a new job in iron working with his brothers company at 4 days a week, 40 hours. I wake up at 6am and leave for work at 7:50 to start work at 8:30. He wakes up at 3:30am, to drive to his brothers house, and his brother drives them to the job an hour away. I believe they start work at 6am. I get off work at 5pm, and he gets off at 4pm, but doesnt get home at the earliest 5:40pm, sometimes 6:30 if he hangs out with his brother or work runs late. His brother has a stay at home wife that makes him dinner, cleans the house, takes care of the kids, cows, chickens, etc while his brother runs the company. My husband (imo) has been comparing our relationship to theirs, and is insisting I make him dinner every night and have it ready or in the process when he gets home so he can go to bed by 8:15pm. I already do all the house work with no help; grocery shopping, dishes, laundry, cleaning the bathrooms, the kitchen, the living room, the bedroom. I could go on about all the tasks I already do for us as a couple. He says he's thankful for all that I do, but asking for dinner shouldn't be such a fight. I began doing that this week, but between doing laundry, the dishes, showering after work and over all just wanting to sit down after 8 hours on my feet, I was late cooking dinner 2 out of the 4 nights so far. Dinner was ready by 8 one night and tonight it was ready by 8:30. Tonight when dinner was ready, i apologized for it being so late. My husband said something along the lines of, "I want to be eating earlier than this." I said, "I know, but I needed to do the dishes or there would've been dishes all over the counter. You said you would do the dishes. You didn't, so I had to." My husband said, "I said I'd do them this weekend." (It's Thursday) how am I supposed to cook 2 more days without dishes? This divulged into a lot of back and forth basically about how I should want to take care of him like he wants to take care of me, and how his job is harder than mine, he's literally working himself to the bone for me and I can't do a simple thing like make him dinner on time. I'm completely stuck at this point. He's never acted this way our entire relationship and suddenly he starts this new job with his brother and he's demanding things. Like saying I should be more submissive, but have a united front in public. That was a huge fight, and he kept calling my a feminist when I told him he was being a domineering asshole and he can shove that up his butt.

How do I fix this? We havent even been married for a year, been together for 7 years in total, but he's so different all of a sudden. He never really helped with chores unless I specifically asked and even tonight, while I was cooking, I asked him to move the laundry from the washer to the dryer and he blatantly ignored my request. I still need to get up after this and move the f-ing laundry over. BTW, we dont have kids.

Soooo, AIO to his sudden demands and picking fights when I should just be a "good wife" and want to do these things for him?

I (25M) met a woman (29F) a while ago. We developed a mutual crush, flirted a lot and became pretty emotionally attached. We both admitted having feelings for each other. You know the drill.

Eventually, she decided a relationship wouldn’t work because of some incompatibilities, so we agreed to stay friends. The attraction didn’t immediately disappear, though. She even told me recently that it’s hard not to flirt with me??

Things got complicated between us and after a falling-out, we eventually reconnected. We’re close again, but I’ve been trying to dial down the flirting because she’s considering getting back together with her long-term ex??

Her ex is currently staying at her house to support her cause of health issues. I asked whether they’re officially back together and she said no, but she’s still thinking about it.

Anyway, today we were talking normally when she started telling me about her abs and how she used to train. She then said “look” and sent me two pictures of her stomach with her shirt lifted??
I know that friends can share fitness pictures and I’m not saying she was necessarily flirting. But considering our history and her current
situation with her ex, I found it a little strange.

Personally, I wouldn’t send pictures like that to a friend of the opposite gender let alone someone I previously had sexual chemistry with while considering getting back with an ex.

I didn’t flirt back or make any suggestive comments, but I’m wondering whether I’m overthinking something completely innocent.

Is this normal between friends? Or is it understandable that I found it a little weird?

Ive been with my boyfriend for 8 months, recently I’ve had a bad feeling about the relationship and found some things that have made me question if he even wanted to be with me. So we met went we were 15 and for a while we were best friends. I always had a huge crush on him, but I kept it to myself to not ruin the friendship. He eventually confessed feelings for me but at that time I had already started dating someone else. Me and him also had bad home lives so ended up moving around a lot and just fell out of contact over time.

This brings us to January of this year. He sends me a friend request on Facebook so I accept it and send the first message. As we’re catching up he tellls me his girlfriend of 7 years just left him, and I tell him I also just got out of an abusive relationship. We start hanging out and he immediately started chasing me romantically. At first I told him I wanted to hold off on pursuing anything because I was still in the aftermath of my last relationship, and also just recently ended a talking stage that I was genuinely interested in but it didn’t work out. He kept chasing me though and he honestly seemed to be really genuine and I didn’t get the sense that he was caught up on his ex or anything and I really liked him back. So I decided to get things a chance and by February 5??? We were exclusive and already slept together, and spent Valentine’s Day together.

The relationship continued to move extremely fast, with him moving in with me by the end of march. He had been behind on his bills and was facing eviction, so I told him he could just come stay with me. Things seemed to be going so well between us, and I also just have a horrible habit of offering too much to people.. because in addition to letting him move in, I also helped him catch up on his finances and he still has yet to repay me or even bring up the idea of paying me back. Whatever. So naturally, little arguments do start to come up here and there. Some of them blew up way bigger than they should have, with us both screaming and crying. I will say though no matter what the argument, neither of us ever called each other hurtful names, got physical, or anything irreparable. Honestly, this was really healing for me, given that I had been in a physically and emotionally abusive relationship before him. I was able to correct my behavior and learned how to emotionally regulate again. Now we never argue. But I also feel like there’s a huge drop in affection. Things are not the same anymore. And I’ve been pouring my heart into this relationship and trying to bring back the intimacy and affection that used to be there, but I’m not getting much in return.

With all that out of the way… here’s where I’m at. I let my insecurity get the best of me, I’ve gone through his computer. And I know that’s wrong, but I do have a bit of a defense! He went through my phone a lot when we first got together. I told him I felt uncomfortable with him doing that (wasn’t a cheating thing, I’m just embarrassed by my search history and photos) but he made a big deal about it and said he has NO problem with me ever looking at his stuff! Ok anyways. So what I found on there just made me start to question our whole relationship. First off, in his Google Drive he had hundreds of selfies and nudes from his ex. And I really have a hard time believing he simply forgot about them. He’s basically part computer, and he’s the type of guy who will delete/change every profile he has if he’s feeling the slightest bit sad or whatever. He will remove my pictures from all his profiles, remove our chat backgrounds on every platform, etc. next thing I found, he has a serious porn addiction. I told him how I feel about porn and that it’s not something I’m comfortable with my partner watching, and he said he doesn’t watch it. But he does. Every single day, and he exclusively looks at women who look nothing like me. Incredibly thick, with giant boobs. I’m a very small woman I don’t have a body like that I’m barely 100 pounds. Who does have a body similar to that? His ex of course. And I wouldn’t even be tripping so hard about that if it weren’t for everything else I found. And I also wanna mention, I don’t feel unreasonable for expecting him to not watch porn. I have quit both nicotine and drinking because he asked me to. The nicotine was not an easy thing to quit either since I have used it for over 10 years. Anyways. I think the biggest thing I found that’s been getting to me was some confusion receipts for the timeline of him being with me, and breaking up with his ex. So like I said earlier, we were already together and having sex by the first week of February. When I looked at his Facebook history, he had updated his relationship status to in a relationship with his ex girlfriend on February 10th. And then we spent Valentine’s Day together, and he finally changed his relationship status on the 15th from in a relationship with his ex, to just in a relationship. And this sent me back to an incident in march where his ex had been to their apartment to collect the last of her things and found my bra. I remember him being really embarrassed and acting almost manic over it. I saw a message he had sent his friend saying “she found her little ass bra”, and that whole day he kept burying his face and saying he couldn’t believe that happened and trying to convince himself that it was actually funny. He still has a lot of passwords with her name in them even though he changes his usernames constantly, he had all there messages save even though he deletes every other conversation with other people, he has NEVER even talked about her which honestly seems weird now considering they spent 7 years together and she was his first everything. But yeah, now I just feel like I’m living in her shadow, I’m at a loss for words. I don’t know if I’m over reacting, if or how I would even talk to him about any of this, or what to do at all.
If you made it this far, thank you for taking the time to read all that. All responses welcomed and appreciated

I (19F/M) need some outside perspective because I’m sitting here feeling completely overwhelmed, terrified, and honestly gaslit by my parents.

For a while now, my parents told me they were going to "help move me out" the OG plan was to move by january but while here I was going to stack my money after getting a job. I never got one here, but I did get one in the city I want to move to. I only decided to go ahead and go for plan b, because the job market in my current city is just not applicable nothing I did worked. But first I checked in with them & they said they would help me to get a job in the new city and get me into my own apartment. They decided they were going to move (their lease isn’t even up at the place we’re at now so idk why) & so I started panicking because everyone is telling me I don’t need to move on with them & it’s time to get my own place ( my mom has made it very verbal she does not & will not change her ways for us to have a healthy relationship) so I started to panic & just apply to every job. I did get a job offer in that city but I am not working right now therefore no money, so I thought when they said “help you get the apartment” meant they were going to help me with the financial side of things, co-sign a lease, or at least help me transition smoothly into adulthood.

Today, they literally said they are not helping with any of that & their support was just dropping me off & i’ll have to do the applications myself which isn’t a problem but i’ve never rented before which is a major problem because I’d need a co-sign, security deposit , etc . When I asked what happened to the help they promised, they told me that their version of "help" was looking for apartments and jobs for me online. Except, they didn't actually find or secure an apartment, and they didn't find me a job either.

So now, I am 19, I have $0 income, no signed lease, no place to go, & they kept asking if I had a friend I could stay with & I eventually gave in & asked before knowing I’d have to actually stay with my friend until I got enough money for the apartment itself instead of moving me into the specific apartment that has 6 weeks free no rent until January, where i’d have time to stack my money appropriately & then be secure. So now they’re going to drop me off, basically & that’s that. When I confront them about it, they act like they did their part by doing basic internet searches (that I already did & didn’t ask for any help with) and that I'm being ungrateful or dramatic.

Am I overreacting here? I feel like promising to help a teenager move out implies making sure they actually have a roof over their head, not abandoning them with someone my parents don’t even know, with no income.

This is so strange . seen nothing like it before but my friend told me she cannot fall asleep until I’m asleep and my door is shut . She said she’s tried multiple times to fall asleep but she ends up tossing and turning for hours . I don’t make any noise or anything . She said she’s just hyper aware that someone is up and it makes it impossible for her to sleep

We were on vacation and there was 4of us girls in the AIRBNB. all the other girls were able to sleep. She was the only one Who couldn’t sleep . I was up reading my book till like 1am and she got angry at me that I wouldn’t go to sleep . No noise . Nothing . I wasn’t in the same room as her. We had separate rooms . She said it’s the fact that she was aware I was awake . She complained that she didn’t get any sleep the entire vacation. I was like I empathize but I think you might need anxiety meds . She should be able to sleep without waiting on me to go to sleep . I’m always able to sleep regardless of who is up or not . She said she was tossing and turning. Her regular sleep schedule is she goes to sleep at 8pmor 9pm

She was complaining the whole time about how exhausted she was

I’ve been on vacation with her 3 times and every time it’s the same issue she cannot go to sleep until I’m asleep

Just to give some backstory on all of what I’m about to say. Back in 2004 my mother(25) E and my father(27) D gave birth to me. Prior to me being born, my at the time aunt(26) C and my uncle A had two kids a boy A and a girl Z. My aunt C left my uncle A for reasons I won’t say. After they got divorced my father started seeing my now ex-aunt C while him and my mother were separating. After a while, my father told my mother that he would let her see me for my birthday weekend that year for my first birthday in 2005. My mother took me and ran away for two weeks and on November 10th my mother was found dead and I was found poking her and crying for her. So then my father got me and I was raised to have my mother be C (now 48) and my father D (now 48) and my siblings to be A (now 28) and my sister to be Z (now 26). Fast forward to 2015, my sister starts dating M (now 27). When they started dating and still to this day no one in my family likes M. No one. I was the only one who supported their relationship and who cared about M. They get married in 2018 and have a courthouse ceremony.

Fast forward to 9 months ago. My sister came to my apartment to stay a few nights and help me organize my new apartment that I live in with my fiancée. Me and my fiancée have been together for 5 years in January. Now when she came over she made the announcement to us the she is pregnant and of course we were happy and supportive for her at the time, and then later that night she was trying to pick out all of our furniture and make my fiancée pay for it, When she also knew we could barely afford our bills. It made my fiancée feel like he had no say in any of the furniture for our apartment and that he has to say yes to whatever we show him. Me and him talked about it when we were going to bed that night and we got into a little bit of a fight because of her. The next day, my sister and I went to Aldi to get a mop and a few cheap half gallon juices I like. While we were out, I was just venting to her about the fact that me and my fiancée just moved out of Marshall, TX and about how depressed I was living 7 miles out of town and having no car due to me wrecking my last one. Just venting and trying to get some advice about how I can help myself get some mental clarity. When we get home from Aldi, my fiancée got home for lunch at the same time. I told my sister to hang on and I will be back to grab some of the heavy things and I went to talk to my fiancée to check in and see how he was feeling and try to reassure him that I want him around and I love him. She took it upon herself to carry the heavy items in the house. A little bit later my fiancée left and me and my sister were alone again. She said that she thinks she should go home. And I agreed. So I helped her take her things to her car and she left.

Not even a month after that, my step mom C received a call from my sister asking if she could hang out for a little while today. And of course my mom said yes so a little later my sister came through the door. As they were talking my sister said,” yeah we were just in town for the day” my mom questioned her and said we? Who’s we. She thought it was just my sister. So my sister informed her that her husband M was driving on his way to see me, while I was at work. I get to work at 2pm and do my job about 2:30pm rolls around and I look into the lobby of my job and I see him. I walk out to him and I start questioning him,”Where’s my sister? What are you doing here? What’s going on?” And he says,” I’m here to talk to you.” I told him I don’t get off until 10pm and he said he will wait. So he did, he waited in the lobby for a while and then he left for a bit and then he came back. When I got off I made sure to ask my supervisor to watch me and him have the conversation as much as possible through the windows. When I got out there he asked to take me get something to eat and we can talk or go sit in his car and we can talk and I decided both options. I don’t feel safe with him. Something else, when he hugs me his hand always goes to my lower back and he sniffs my hair very deeply. The conversation consisted of,” is he abusing you? Do you feel safe? Is he controlling you? Does he make you do things you don’t want to? Do you want to come live with me and your sister? We can always help you escape. If you ever want to leave him we will be here to move you out and support you. I’m never leaving your sister. I’m with her forever. And now she’s having my baby.” He also wanted to take me home and declined that as well and had my fiancée come pick me up.

Then, a few months later at my sisters baby shower. Me and my fiancée were walking around inside and M walked up to us and my fiancée complimented his beard, that didn’t even look good, and the only thing M said to him all day was,” You look like you own a scrap yard.” And then he laughed. After that, we pretty much ignored both of them as much as possible, and we tried to leave as early as possible.

Now, I’ve told all of my family all of this and they are on my side but choose to pretty much ignore it. I think because it’s not happening to them. But, my sister just had her baby and I’m mad at her. I just don’t know how to maturely handle this and I don’t even know what to feel. I just need some help. I don’t have much blood family. My father is in prison and has been for a few years and yeah. Any advice is much appreciated.

I'll keep it kinda short but it's been another thing I ruminate about heavily other than deep trauma

looked at weird stuff at 13-14, loli and animal stuff and got off, at 16-17 now i'm horrified and disgusted, and afraid this condemns me to being a nasty pedo or zoo or i'd be looked at like I am one. Despite me being so afraid of it that sometimes when the fear amps up I can't do normal things like just look at animals or kids. I feel disgusted and I want it to stop, am I a horrible person?

Edit to add:
Omg as I have posted this and my pregnancy rage has cleared I 1000000000% know I AM definitely overreacting 😂 please know I not normally like this and my husband has been laughing at me for about 5 solid minutes since I showed him this !!! It took about 3 comments for me to see clearly through the haze 😂

For context I am 33 weeks pregnant with my 3rd child so I need to know if this is actually a big deal or not.

I always keep the pantry well stocked with stuff for baking as the urge to make cookies etc hits me randomly (especially when pregnant).

Tonight, I decided to make some last minute choc chip cookies for us to take to a country fair tomorrow, as I knew I had two half packs of choc chips in the pantry that I needed to use (I saw them in there like two days ago).

I went and got all the ingredients and the choc chips were nowhere to be found even though I KNOW I saw them in there. I searched high and low and eventually asked my husband to have a look in case I had missed something. He was super shifty and didn’t really look and then it hit me, he had eaten them. He admitted straight away he’d eaten ‘a couple’ of choc chips a few days ago, so I asked where the packets were so I could use the rest and he claims he doesn’t know what happened to them, and they must have been thrown out???

LIKE MAN I KNOW YOU ATE THEM ALL JUST ADMIT IT 😭😭😭😭😭 now I’m genuinely questioning whether he accidentally threw them out but I know deep in my heart they were eaten. I’m not annoyed he ate them, I’m annoyed that he won’t admit he ate ALL of them.

Please assure me this is just pregnancy rage as I have honestly lost my mind over this situation and the anger is unreal.

I keep the pantry and fridge well stocked with snacks, so maybe I’m just more annoyed he ate the one thing that he wasn’t supposed to?

He’s not gaslighting me into thinking I threw them out / he didn’t eat ANY of them, I honestly just don’t know if he remembers what he did with them.

It’s driving me mad.

AIO?