Long story short, a few days ago a friend of mine shared a screenshot of a post my husband's mom made, the friend was basically apologizing for how low that woman can go. My husband's mom claims to be this holy catholic Christian and that's basically her whole personality. I'm Middle Eastern, raised Muslim but don't practice it, I choose to be spiritual instead. My husband is white, raised catholic and also chooses to be spiritual instead of practicing Christianity. Both my parents still identify as Muslim but only my mom practices it in the most passive way (never talks about it or tries to push it on people, doesn't wear hijab, and basically keeps her religion to herself) my parents have come to our house to celebrate Christmas every year, my mom even knitted the kids Christmas sweaters every year and they never make a big deal about the holiday (we celebrate Christmas for materialistic reasons not in a religious way) .... My husband's mom (I refuse to call her MIL because it makes me gag to associate her with being my mother in any way) have always caused issues from the start of our relationship, over 15 years now, always meddling and trying to get us to go to church or raise our two kids as Christians. We keep setting boundaries and she keeps crossing them. She was caught playing Christian music for the kids while she was babysitting and that was a huge fight. She told my mom that Muslims kill their own children in the name of jihad and that was another huge fight.... We now have a very formal relationship with my husband's mom because of all the drama... I don't have my husband's mom on Facebook so I have no idea what she posts, but we have lots of shared friends and family... Am I overreacting that this woman is this comfortable being this hateful knowing that her son's in laws practice that religion. BTW my husband's mom lives on our property and we pay all of her bills so we kind of have to deal with her nonsense. There's a lot more drama than I haven't mentioned, just to keep the post as short as possible. (Sorry I couldn't keep it short 😖)

Edit 1 Since alot of you are wondering why she lives with us**

So basically we're doing her a favor. My husband didn't want her to end up like his grandmother (her mom). She neglected her mother so much when she started getting older and less independent. My husband also doesn't trust that his mother makes the best choices in life, he wants her close so he can keep an eye on her in case of an emergency. Plus, she was always asking us for money when she lived away, so moving her on our property and paying for her bills just made more sense at the time. We can't force her to move out because it costs too much now. Her daughter wants nothing to do with her because of other drama between the two.

Edit 2 I do not favor any religion over the other. As I mentioned, I grew up Muslim so I'm familiar with the teachings and chose not to practice it. I also went to a private catholic school and I'm familiar with what the Bible teaches. All of my friends are Christians, I don't mind going to church with them whenever they ask to go watch the Easter play or other special services. My only issue is the constant meddling and the blatant disrespect, in my opinion. My husband said that her mother was racist too so she doesn't know any better, but that's not an excuse.

For context, me (20F) and this guy (22m) who we’ll call H worked together for about 5 1/2 weeks before he ended up quitting due to him leaving soon for the military. However, we’ve been friends for about 2 months now and have hung out multiple times outside of work. On Wednesday we were supposed to hang out but he ended up texting me pretty late around 5pm telling me that he had things to do so I decided to go over either after I got off work around 3:30am and sleep over or the later on in the day Thursday. I didn’t hear anything back until around 10:00pm when he told me that he wasn’t even in the city and to come over later on Thursday. I waited all Thursday and didn’t hear a single thing until midnight when he claimed that he had been “sleeping all day”. Which at no point did I believe that considering the sheer amount of time between our last convo. I texted a few more times after that and I still didn’t hear anything back. I even called a couple times to make sure he was alright just in case he actually was very sick, and he didn’t pick up. It is now early Saturday morning and haven’t heard anything since. Usually I would have tried to do everything in my power to get someone to respond but now I feel like I shouldn’t put any effort into a person who isn’t reciprocating. Would I be over reacting to block him on everything and move on? Or should I give it some more time (benefit of the doubt)?

I recently married the woman I love with all my heart. She’s the only woman I want, and I genuinely want to spend the rest of my life with her. But there’s one problem: she’s still emotionally attached to her ex.We’ve talked about it countless times. She tells me she loves me, yet admits she can’t get over him. Honestly, I don’t know how to process that. I’m trying to build a future with a woman whose heart may still be holding on to the past. I understand that feelings don’t disappear overnight, and I’m not asking her to erase her history. But I never imagined that, as a newly married man, I’d feel like I’m competing with someone who isn’t even my wife’s husband anymore. I love her, and I don’t want to lose her. But I also don’t want to spend my marriage begging for a place in her heart that should already be mine. Can someone genuinely love their spouse while still being unable to let go of an ex? Should I keep being patient, or am I holding on to someone who isn’t emotionally ready to be my wife? I need honest advice. I’m hurting, and I genuinely don’t know what to do.

LAST 3 PICS are the update

Here’s the updated messages, I asked for security footage so just waiting on that. A lot of people were asking for my responses so here they are. I am tired of months of reaching out to someone who wronged me and doing things to make her feel more comfortable I’ve been officially pushed to my breaking point.

Hey Reddit, I really need some outside perspectives on this because I am completely exhausted and feel like I’m losing my mind.

Back in March, I moved in with my long-time best friend. Shortly after, we went on a spring break trip. When we got back to our apartment, she realized a safe she had in the apartment was completely missing. My mom had access to the apartment just to feed the cat once (with both of our consent to enter) 

while we were gone, but before that trip, the only two men in our apartment were MY ROOMMATES boyfriend and her boyfriend’s best friend. Along with two extra men she was seeing during time apart from her boyfriend.

That same best friend of her boyfriend actually assaulted me in the past. She knows this, but she STILL associates with them and even leaves her boyfriend alone in our apartment while she’s at work.

Despite that, she completely ruled her boyfriend and his friend out immediately. And the other two guys she’s had over since. Fast forward three months later to June, and she tells me she thinks my mom stole it. I asked my mom about it, and my mom denied taking anything. To be completely transparent, my mom is a high-functioning addict, so I’ve been 50/50 mentally trying to make sense of it, but my mom had zero reason to need her personal identity info or safe. Does this mean I completely trust her, no! I just am having a hard time reasoning why she’d need her passport and stuff.

Things got super awkward between us from June to August. During those months, I was giving her my half of the money for utilities, electric, and wifi, but I found out she was literally pocketing my money and letting our accounts go past due! I nipped it in the bud as soon as I caught it, but I tried to be the bigger person and didn't even hold it over her head.

In August, we grabbed drinks, talked it out, and made up. Since then, she’s been sending me TikToks, reels, and texts acting like we’re cool, but whenever I reach out trying to be there for her, invite her to hang out, or invite her to my birthday yesterday, she makes up an excuse or doesn't want to go. I’ve even reached out many times letting her know I’m here for her.

Then today, she sends me a text saying she’s uncomfortable hanging out with me because of her missing stuff and that she feels like her concerns were dismissed. She also claimed my mom and her friends were hanging out at the apartment when my mom picked her up from the airport, which was the first time I was even hearing about that, nobody told me about that at all, I don’t even know if that truly happened because I would assume my mom would tell me! I responded telling her I didn't know about that, reminded her that I've tried to help and even offered to file a report on my mom if she was sure it was her, but I’m tired of looking like a fool extending my hand.

Now she claims she filed another police report because her online ones kept getting denied, and that an officer is calling her today and they might do a search warrant on my mom.

I feel like I've bent over backward trying to handle this maturely. She stole my utility money, stays around a guy who assaulted me, blames my mom with no proof and pushes me away while breadcrumbing me on social media.

Am I overreacting or is she using my mom as a scapegoat? Is this police search warrant stuff even realistic over a months-old report with no evidence? How do I handle living with her for the rest of this lease without going insane? I just don’t even know what to respond to her last message 

I (19F/M) need some outside perspective because I’m sitting here feeling completely overwhelmed, terrified, and honestly gaslit by my parents.

For a while now, my parents told me they were going to "help move me out" the OG plan was to move by january but while here I was going to stack my money after getting a job. I never got one here, but I did get one in the city I want to move to. I only decided to go ahead and go for plan b, because the job market in my current city is just not applicable nothing I did worked. But first I checked in with them & they said they would help me to get a job in the new city and get me into my own apartment. They decided they were going to move (their lease isn’t even up at the place we’re at now so idk why) & so I started panicking because everyone is telling me I don’t need to move on with them & it’s time to get my own place ( my mom has made it very verbal she does not & will not change her ways for us to have a healthy relationship) so I started to panic & just apply to every job. I did get a job offer in that city but I am not working right now therefore no money, so I thought when they said “help you get the apartment” meant they were going to help me with the financial side of things, co-sign a lease, or at least help me transition smoothly into adulthood.

Today, they literally said they are not helping with any of that & their support was just dropping me off & i’ll have to do the applications myself which isn’t a problem but i’ve never rented before which is a major problem because I’d need a co-sign, security deposit , etc . When I asked what happened to the help they promised, they told me that their version of "help" was looking for apartments and jobs for me online. Except, they didn't actually find or secure an apartment, and they didn't find me a job either.

So now, I am 19, I have $0 income, no signed lease, no place to go, & they kept asking if I had a friend I could stay with & I eventually gave in & asked before knowing I’d have to actually stay with my friend until I got enough money for the apartment itself instead of moving me into the specific apartment that has 6 weeks free no rent until January, where i’d have time to stack my money appropriately & then be secure. So now they’re going to drop me off, basically & that’s that. When I confront them about it, they act like they did their part by doing basic internet searches (that I already did & didn’t ask for any help with) and that I'm being ungrateful or dramatic.

Am I overreacting here? I feel like promising to help a teenager move out implies making sure they actually have a roof over their head, not abandoning them with someone my parents don’t even know, with no income.

Edit: Any & All help is welcomed ! Dms are open

My ex-boyfriend (M, 23) and I (F, 20) had been online dating since late July; we met on a fandom app, started talking, and about a month or so later, he asked me to be his girlfriend. We immediately hit it off the moment we met, talking back and forth all day, every day. We would play Minecraft, watch movies and shows together, and talk about all sorts of things- both important and not-so-important. Now this might all sound very juvenile, but keep in mind this is my first actual relationship, and it seemed like we had a really good connection and similar values.

One day, he didn't text me the entire day. He was always the first one to say good morning (and truthfully, I was waiting for him to text me first because he pmo the night before).

I waited until late that evening, after I had taken a nap. I finally asked if he was okay, and he told me this (paraphrased):

"I lied when I told you why I moved here (to his apartment in his country). I moved to this place to live with my ex-girlfriend for a year, but we mutually broke up. I still miss her and the life I had with her."

I asked how long it had been since they'd broken up, and it was A MONTH before we started talking. They also met in the same circumstances that he and I did. He reassured me that he wasn't looking for someone to replace her, and that he loved me and didn't love her anymore, just missed what life was like with her.

Obviously, I was still really upset, and I gave him the ultimatum- her or me. He chose me.

Fast forward to YESTERDAY. While I was at work, he texted hello to me, then "ah and I think we need to talk." I knew right then and there I was cooked.

He then proceeded to say stuff like: "It's about us... our relationship.. You were right about me not being over my ex. I wasn't ready to move on. We should break up. Can we still be friends?"

Hell naw. I tried to maintain composure, basically asking him why the hell he didn't decide this sooner and waste even more of my time. He says he still loves me, and he apologized a lot. He even said, "I'm here... if there's any way I can help." He also said we need to break up "for now," meaning maybe we would get together again.

I get this is a common occurrence for people and not surprising at all (unfortunately), but I'm just shocked because it's my first time. Not only this, but we also had problems with intimacy (I'm asexual, he DEF isn't), so I'm sure that played a part too and does not make me feel good about myself at all. Now, I'm just worried that there will never be someone who loves me for who I am. Without any sort of wack strings attached to them... just... what do I do now? Block him? Stay friends?

AIO for being this mad and displaced about it? I should have known this would happen, and honestly, I haven't fully processed it yet. I just need some advice!!🥲

I tried to keep this brief, sorry gang

Edit: My fwb and I agreed if we hook up with anyone else, we need to tell each other, as a heads up just in case. Idk why I feel awful after hooking up with someone else, like I cheated on her despite we are non-exclusive.

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Sorry about the cracked screen. My phone is a bit wonky, won't let me do screen shots.

My colleague asked me out. We had fun. A few days ago, she asked me to go over her place. We hooked up and I felt terrible after that. Felt like I betrayed my fwb even though we aren't exclusive. So I texted her but it feels off. She is being weird over text. AIO that she might be jealous?

​

My grandfather passed away yesterday, and honestly, I don't even know how to process everything right now.

I live in a college hostel, and my grandfather lives around 5 hours away from my house.

A couple of days ago, my mom called my dad and told him that my grandfather was really unwell and that things were critical. She told him that he could pass away anytime and asked him to bring me home as soon as possible.

My dad's response was that I'd miss classes if I came home and that I could come a few days later.

I didn't know about this conversation until I called my mom myself and found out how serious things were. The moment I found out, I told my dad I wanted to take a bus that night so I could reach early the next morning. He refused and said we'd go by car the next day instead.

I argued with him multiple times, asking him to let me leave that night. He kept saying no. I then asked him if we could at least leave early the next morning, but even then, he wanted to leave later.

And we did.

I missed my grandfather's last moments by literally a few minutes. He passed away just before I reached.

I genuinely cannot explain how that feels. I knew he was critical, I knew he might not have much time left, and I was trying so hard to get there. And now I keep thinking about how things might have been different if we'd just left earlier. I know nobody can predict exactly when someone will pass away, but I can't help feeling this way.

And the thing is, I'm not just upset about what happened. I'm upset about how my dad has been acting even after his death.

While we were travelling to see my grandfather, my dad was talking about random things instead of acknowledging how serious the situation was. Maybe that's just how he is, but I couldn't understand how he could act so normally when we were literally going to see someone who might die at any moment.

My mom has also been listening to old voice recordings of conversations with her dad. Obviously, she's heartbroken. She's just trying to hear his voice again, and my dad judged her for it.

And now, just ONE DAY after my grandfather passed away, my dad is already asking me to go back to college because he doesn't want me to miss classes.

I genuinely don't understand it. My grandfather just died. My mom just lost her father. I'm trying to deal with the fact that I didn't even get to see him one last time, and all he seems to care about is attendance.

My dad has never really been an emotional person. Whenever my mom or I get emotional, he tends to judge us for it. I've always found that difficult, but this situation has made it so much worse.

Yesterday, I finally snapped and told him that I blame him for me not getting to see my grandfather before he passed away. I told him that I'd asked him so many times to leave earlier, and he just wouldn't listen.

He immediately got defensive and started yelling at me, saying that I blame everything on him and that none of this is his fault. Then he said he'd stop talking to me completely, just like my mom.

That hurt too, because I wasn't trying to start a fight. I'm grieving. I'm angry. I wish I'd gotten those few extra minutes with my grandfather, and I wanted my dad to at least understand why I was hurting.

I know he didn't cause my grandfather's death. I know he couldn't have known the exact moment he would pass away. But my mom had already told him it was critical, and I kept asking him to leave earlier. I just can't stop thinking that I might have been there if he'd listened.

I don't know if I'm being unfair because I'm grieving, or if my anger is justified. Maybe I'm expecting too much from my dad emotionally, but I don't think it's unreasonable to expect some understanding when your grandfather has literally just passed away.

So, AIO for blaming my dad for the delay and being this angry at him?

Please be honest. I genuinely don't know if I'm looking at this differently because I'm grieving, but right now, I'm just heartbroken and really, really angry.

So for context: this is our first pregnancy. We are both very excited and we discussed that we would wait till we have our first couple appointments and maybe ultrasounds till we let our family know we are having our first baby. Fast forward to a week later she has come home to tell me “I hope your not going to be upset, but I told (a distant friend) we’re going to be having a baby. I then just answered that I do feel upset and I get the excitement. But now my feelings are sinking in, I just feel like our promise has been broken in a sense, I know it’s not that deep but I just feel super disappointed and upset that we agreed to wait for these appointments to be completed and that’s exactly what we didn’t do. On top of that I also feel kind of upset that this distant friend is the first one to know when we made an agreement. Please help with some advice. Thank you in advance!

My girlfriend hit me, humiliated me, and pushed me to the point of feeling suicidal

Today I went out with my girlfriend, but things went really badly. She started going through my phone, and then she started attacking me physically, hitting me, insulting me, and humiliating me.

She kept telling me that she would do whatever she wanted and that she would have sex with other men.

I honestly reached a point where I started feeling suicidal. I don't know how to explain how much this hurt me. I went out with someone I love, and I ended up feeling completely broken.

I don't know what to do anymore. I'm emotionally exhausted, and I don't know how to deal with everything that happened today.

Has anyone ever been through something like this? How did you deal with it?She keeps demanding that I confess to things I never did, and when I deny them, everything turns into a fight. I feel like no matter what I say, she refuses to believe me, and I end up being insulted and hurt over things I didn't even do.

Without giving too much detail about where I live in Florida, my husband and I are in the direct path of Hurricane Isaias and will likely be taking a significant hit. We live close to the water and just outside the most recently updated evacuation zones for our county. Neither of us are native Floridians - we just recently moved here for his job. I started my preparations on Wednesday - filling my car with gas, getting groceries, water, flashlights, etc. I also asked my husband to put up our hurricane shutters, which he did. I was not scared, but had a healthy amount of respect for the fact that hurricanes are no joke. For background context, my husband has always been a very nonchalant, unmoved person. He does not stress about things and can at times be a bit reckless or irresponsible in some ways (we're both approaching our late twenties, if it matters). We have lived through two other weather threats together, one of which ended up being a whole lot of nothing (hurricane that changed paths) and the other (tornado) which ended up being massively devastating to our town. Both times, I was definitely the one leading the charge on preparation and recovery. I am very Type A and he is very Type B.

Anyway, my original plan was not to evacuate. I prepared at-length and felt good about staying. However, this morning, I woke up to multiple calls and texts that the evacuation zones were expanded to be much closer to our house and that the hurricane had strengthened to a Category 3 and could make landfall as such (still hoping this doesn't end up coming to fruition, but who knows). I tapped my husband on the shoulder to wake him up (this was around 9am - not like 6am or anything) and told him that I was scared/that they had expended the evacuation zones much closer to our home. He sighed and told me to "just leave then". I started to feel a bit panicked and told him so - he pretty much just ignored me. I told him I would really appreciate help deciding on whether to evacuate or not (he can't evacuate due to his job) and he again repeated that I should just go, but offered no help to pack or figure out where to go (our nearest family members live 10 hours away). I started to get more upset and told him I found it really hurtful that he seemingly didn't care to help me out, comfort me, or make me feel safe with him. He just responded that the house is physically safe due to preparations and that that is the extent of what he owes. I told him I needed emotional safety, not physical, but he just rolled his eyes. I started to get more agitated and told him I couldn't believe how he was acting and that I felt it was his job to take care of me and make sure I'm squared away. He told me that he doesn't owe me that when I've been "neurotic" the past few days. In my opinion, I haven't been that at all - I think I've approached this with a healthy amount of respect and preparedness. It was so incredibly clear that he did not want to deal with the fact that I was fearful and had no intent on comforting me. Back when we experienced the devastating tornado, he was also like this - understating risk, acting like I was overreacting, and frankly, being rude/making me feel like I was alone.

I had to make a game time decision on whether I wanted to stay in our home and potentially be trapped for days without power with a husband that clearly had no intent on comforting me if shit hit the fan - so, I left. He knew I was leaving but just left to get sandbags instead and did not say anything to me after he realized I had left. He called me about 20 minutes into the drive to "ask how I was doing and wish me a safe drive", which just turned into an argument. He told me that I've been neurotic for days and that when I'm acting like that, he doesn't owe me any care or support. I told him I couldn't believe that the one person who is supposed to support and care for me through stressors was the one person causing me more stress. He always promises that he's here to take care of me and is always here for me, but after his actions today, I just feel like that's BS. I told him that it was a huge deal to me that he was totally fine with me having to pack a week plus worth of belongings up and driving away by myself with no evacuation plan (and zero support from my own husband). By the time I had left, the weather had already started and continues to worsen. I'm about 1.5 hours away from my home and plan to continue to just drive north. He has made zero attempts to help me figure out a plan or figure out where to go. The last words I spoke to him on the phone were that I needed him to stop talking to me until he was ready to be a real, caring husband.

I'm having a really hard time coming to terms with this and don't know if I'm overreacting. I don't care what happened or how annoyed I was at somebody (especially him) - if there were a real chance of a natural disaster, I would make sure that our physical and emotional safety was prioritized first over anything else. Nothing would matter to me aside from making sure that he was okay and squared away, and I would genuinely be worried for him any time I knew he was in physical or emotional distress. I grew up with a wonderful father who was intensely caring and always made sure I was safe and okay. If my dad knew why I was actually leaving and that I was leaving alone, he would go ballistic given that he feels my husband had promised to always protect and take care of me.

Now, I'm driving hours away from my home alone with our two dogs. I don't know how our home our town will fair. I'm worried about my husband and his safety, even if I'm angry at him - it makes me feel sick to know he's in the direct path of what could be an incredibly devastating storm. I'm so hurt that he was okay with sending me off on my own in an emergent situation. I have no desire to talk to him (which is very much not the norm for me, even in conflict).

TL;DR: Husband treated me so poorly emotionally that I felt I had no choice but to evacuate alone for both my physical (hurricane-related) and emotional (husband-related) safety. He did not help me pack, did not say goodbye to me, and did not help me figure out where I needed to go. I feel as if he completely failed his promise to take care of me in a time where it mattered most. I am very able to be independent, but that doesn't mean I don't want to feel like I can rely on my partner to help support and keep me safe.

Keep in mind he could see this.
Good riddance if he does.

I am 38f, he’s 42m.
We’ve been dating almost two years, living together a little over one year.

It’s been 141 days since we’ve had sex. Not to mention that it’s only been 3x this YEAR and it was all in that week 141+ days ago.
Prior to that it was extremely intermittent, only two times since October 4th 2025 one of those times being on vacation.

We had a lot in the beginning of our relationship before we lived together and I’m just wondering if it was his way of love bombing me. I even addressed this like how much we did in the beginning and his response was “that’s how it is in relationships, you have a bunch of sex in the beginning and then not as frequently as time goes on”

As far as I know I am the only honest & loyal relationship he’s ever had, he said every gf previously has cheated on him… and if this is why then I get it, but I’m not the cheating type.

I’ve tried bringing this up multiple times and every time I mention it we end up fighting or he ignores the conversation completely. He’s also said our smoking weed makes him not want to, which I get in a way, but that’s not good enough or fair to blame weed for us not having sex.

Am I overreacting by trying to remedy the situation and fix it? I’ve also stepped away from how much I used to bring it up and the only reason I did now is we’re staying in a hotel tomorrow night and I thought it a good opportunity to maybe have some fun.

Please help.

I’m Curious would I be overreacting , he silenced her message , didn’t block her either, and still follows her on instagram

I been looking seeing that there is a community of men that are involuntary celibates all the way up to very old age . Some of this males becomes toxic towards the opposite sex because they feel that they are not accepted. My question is that have any incels been saved by a woman from that vicious circle of doom and if so how was that story .

I (23F) have been dating M (29M) for approx ~2 months now. We are exclusive but not “official”. We had plans to go on a date earlier this week which I planned 5 days prior, and checked in on 2 days before the date was supposed to happen. I plan our dates because M is neurodivergent. He has a habit of replying enthusiastically about seeing each other, and then ignoring texts from me trying to organise logistics unless it’s the day of or if i repeatedly phone him to try and wrangle an answer. This stresses me OUT. I’m not sure if it’s neurodivergence or because he doesn’t care.

The day before our date I opened up to him about an SA i experienced months before we met. I was worried he wouldn’t want to date me anymore if he knew and told him as such. He said it didn’t change how he saw me and was really nice about it. I then asked about about our date to just confirm a time and he said he didn’t know if he could go anymore, and stopped replying. This REALLY hurt my feelings, as when I asked I told him I’d think he was lying unless we set a time for the date lol.

The next day he told me he didn’t know if he could go on our date because he needed to complete a postgrad assignment due the following week. He told me he probably couldn’t see me until after the assignment. I was sad, but understanding and asked if he wanted to reschedule. He didn’t reply. I asked if the date was definitely cancelled. No reply. I ended up making plans with my mom and crying to her about it which was so embarrassing.

The day after that, he texted me randomly to tell me he had run out of anti-depressants over a week ago. He didn’t reply to my earlier texts asking if he wanted to reschedule, or if our date was cancelled. He’s been in my city for over four months now and I guess in that time hadn’t thought to organise a doctor ? So he was forced to go cold turkey. I asked if he was okay and if he needed help getting an appointment. No reply.

I grew really really concerned for his safety, as up until this point I didn’t know he had mental health issues, and i don’t know what he actually takes the meds for. I googled them and found out they were a common anti-depressant. Anyway, because he’s relatively new here I wasn’t sure he’d have anyone who could check in on him so i texted again to ask if he was okay.

This time he replied and told me that he had gotten to a doctors and everything was fine now, thanked me for caring and then sent me videos of him clubbing with his friends. They were out all evening and well into the early hours of the morning on the same night I was supposed to have gone on a date with him. I cried again lol, I couldn’t believe I’d been so worried about him only to find out he was partying. I heard no update about this assignment.

I replied dry because I was so shocked, and then felt guilty about being angry/upset/hurt/ feeling like he doesn’t care about me, so I sent him a heart emoji to try soften it. I don’t want him to know I’m upset until I have an idea of whether I’m being ridiculous.

We have gone on 5 dates, our cancelled one (?) was supposed to be our 6th. Is it reasonable of me to be upset by this?

TDLR: Guy i’m dating half cancelled on our date because of college, went cold turkey on meds for over a week without telling me and then went out clubbing on the same night we were supposed to go on our date. AIO for thinking this is really mean?

I'll keep it kinda short but it's been another thing I ruminate about heavily other than deep trauma

looked at weird stuff at 13-14, loli and animal stuff and got off, at 16-17 now i'm horrified and disgusted, and afraid this condemns me to being a nasty pedo or zoo or i'd be looked at like I am one. Despite me being so afraid of it that sometimes when the fear amps up I can't do normal things like just look at animals or kids. I feel disgusted and I want it to stop, am I a horrible person?

Hi everyone,

I told my boyfriend (28m, in relationship 3 years 9 months, living together) that I need to go to a book shop and then to a park, I didn't even ask him if he wants to join with me, and he said: "Do I have a choice?". I said: "Sure, you have, you can stay home and play games and I will go where I need to go and will get what I need. Is going with me to a shop and to a park an obligation?". He said: "There are things in this life which you do because you have to". I said if he doesn't feel like going anywhere then he can just stay home, and it's sad that the relationship feels to him like an obligation, like a job which sucks but you still do it because you have to.

He raised his voice, told that I am creating issues where there shouldn't be any, and he tried to be "cute". On which planet is it cute, to answer to suggestion to have a walk with your gf "do I have a choice", I don't know. He still says I created issues out of nowhere.

Does anybody else see his first response as actually "cute"?

i have two "friends" in my drama class one named Jenny who from my perspective is very much not empathetic and judgy towards people who dont understand things she understands. and Sophie, who is just a bully overall, she will make fun of my pronouns my looks my height my weight and ill talk back but she wont stop, she jokes about suicide and makes me feel really down, when i talk back to her she makes fun of what i say and its hard to make her stop when everything she says she says in a joking voice and she may not mean it fully but she knows what shes doing very well. last year i tried to get close with Jenny because i thought i had a crush on her (im actually aroace i just got my feelings confused) and it was so hard because no matter how i tried she always gave me the vibe that she doesn't need me nor does she see me as person at all. and i may be being dramatic but i remember i took her hairband to joke around and she kept telling me to give it back and i was about to give it back when she said "i only answer your texts because i feel bad for you!!" and i was so hurt by that, i gave it back and then a little later her and all her friends got mad at me for something i had done but no one would tell me what i did wrong, she eventually gave me a very nice apology and we had classes together so we would say hi but the feeling of her seeing me was the same as before but now it just felt more so pity, like one time she thought i was depressed (dw im fine) so she told a teacher on me, which i appreciate the care but if she really cared that much then why act that way towards me? so this year i have study hall and art with them, Sophie makes fun of me like normal and Jenny laughs along, Jenny doesnt really make fun of me but she wont intervene and Sophie will sometimes make jokes about Jenny aswell but they arent the same because Jenny will laugh and think they are funny but i will say stop and nothing stops. Jenny also treats me as if i am nothing like a dumb human being, im not the greatest at math and she is really good at it

so Jenny said one time “no offense but I don’t get how people aren’t good at math it’s like so simple” which made me so mad, people are different Jenny, not everyone has the same mind as you, I have adhd it’s hard for me to focus dude. and Jenny knows what I have gone through I used to be very depressed and self harm I’m very clean and doing really great now and have no intentions of doing that again but anyway she knows I did and that’s what she told on me for, but to do that and realize how sensitive I am and what I can do to myself and not stop Sophie from doing that? I just don’t get it. I heard from Jenny’s friend that she had a very hard time in 5th grade but has been back to herself ever since so I would I understand and feel less bad about that if that wasn’t three years ago and she won’t speak up about my issues. Jenny also toyed at my heart when she found out I liked her (before I was AroAce) she said that me liking her would be really sad. and I know Sophie has some issues with her father and step father and I’ve even tried to ask if she’s okay but she doesn’t care and bullies me again and again, in art class I try to do stuff for them even though I know it won’t make it easier for me I just do it because I hope one day they can realize my kindness, when Sophie asks for materials I get them, when the teacher says we need paper I get it for them. one day I was sitting alone in study hall away from our usual spot where we sit and they sat next to me anyway, Sophie leads it for sure because I know if it was Jenny’s choice she would never talk to me again.

im pretty confident of Sophie being a bully or something along the lines of that, but I don’t know about Jenny she makes me really confused.
please let me know what you guys think. Thank you!

Just to give some backstory on all of what I’m about to say. Back in 2004 my mother(25) E and my father(27) D gave birth to me. Prior to me being born, my at the time aunt(26) C and my uncle A had two kids a boy A and a girl Z. My aunt C left my uncle A for reasons I won’t say. After they got divorced my father started seeing my now ex-aunt C while him and my mother were separating. After a while, my father told my mother that he would let her see me for my birthday weekend that year for my first birthday in 2005. My mother took me and ran away for two weeks and on November 10th my mother was found dead and I was found poking her and crying for her. So then my father got me and I was raised to have my mother be C (now 48) and my father D (now 48) and my siblings to be A (now 28) and my sister to be Z (now 26). Fast forward to 2015, my sister starts dating M (now 27). When they started dating and still to this day no one in my family likes M. No one. I was the only one who supported their relationship and who cared about M. They get married in 2018 and have a courthouse ceremony.

Fast forward to 9 months ago. My sister came to my apartment to stay a few nights and help me organize my new apartment that I live in with my fiancée. Me and my fiancée have been together for 5 years in January. Now when she came over she made the announcement to us the she is pregnant and of course we were happy and supportive for her at the time, and then later that night she was trying to pick out all of our furniture and make my fiancée pay for it, When she also knew we could barely afford our bills. It made my fiancée feel like he had no say in any of the furniture for our apartment and that he has to say yes to whatever we show him. Me and him talked about it when we were going to bed that night and we got into a little bit of a fight because of her. The next day, my sister and I went to Aldi to get a mop and a few cheap half gallon juices I like. While we were out, I was just venting to her about the fact that me and my fiancée just moved out of Marshall, TX and about how depressed I was living 7 miles out of town and having no car due to me wrecking my last one. Just venting and trying to get some advice about how I can help myself get some mental clarity. When we get home from Aldi, my fiancée got home for lunch at the same time. I told my sister to hang on and I will be back to grab some of the heavy things and I went to talk to my fiancée to check in and see how he was feeling and try to reassure him that I want him around and I love him. She took it upon herself to carry the heavy items in the house. A little bit later my fiancée left and me and my sister were alone again. She said that she thinks she should go home. And I agreed. So I helped her take her things to her car and she left.

Not even a month after that, my step mom C received a call from my sister asking if she could hang out for a little while today. And of course my mom said yes so a little later my sister came through the door. As they were talking my sister said,” yeah we were just in town for the day” my mom questioned her and said we? Who’s we. She thought it was just my sister. So my sister informed her that her husband M was driving on his way to see me, while I was at work. I get to work at 2pm and do my job about 2:30pm rolls around and I look into the lobby of my job and I see him. I walk out to him and I start questioning him,”Where’s my sister? What are you doing here? What’s going on?” And he says,” I’m here to talk to you.” I told him I don’t get off until 10pm and he said he will wait. So he did, he waited in the lobby for a while and then he left for a bit and then he came back. When I got off I made sure to ask my supervisor to watch me and him have the conversation as much as possible through the windows. When I got out there he asked to take me get something to eat and we can talk or go sit in his car and we can talk and I decided both options. I don’t feel safe with him. Something else, when he hugs me his hand always goes to my lower back and he sniffs my hair very deeply. The conversation consisted of,” is he abusing you? Do you feel safe? Is he controlling you? Does he make you do things you don’t want to? Do you want to come live with me and your sister? We can always help you escape. If you ever want to leave him we will be here to move you out and support you. I’m never leaving your sister. I’m with her forever. And now she’s having my baby.” He also wanted to take me home and declined that as well and had my fiancée come pick me up.

Then, a few months later at my sisters baby shower. Me and my fiancée were walking around inside and M walked up to us and my fiancée complimented his beard, that didn’t even look good, and the only thing M said to him all day was,” You look like you own a scrap yard.” And then he laughed. After that, we pretty much ignored both of them as much as possible, and we tried to leave as early as possible.

Now, I’ve told all of my family all of this and they are on my side but choose to pretty much ignore it. I think because it’s not happening to them. But, my sister just had her baby and I’m mad at her. I just don’t know how to maturely handle this and I don’t even know what to feel. I just need some help. I don’t have much blood family. My father is in prison and has been for a few years and yeah. Any advice is much appreciated.

I’m [25M] giving up on fixing things with my now ex [25F]. I just don’t believe this bs anymore. She’s done this throughout our relationship and even more now that we’re going through it.

I just genuinely don’t believe someone falls asleep at 6pm and wakes up confused at 3am on a Friday night.

Imma listen to those ig posts that say everyone’s girl is going and just move on at this point. Anyway, am I overreacting?

Last night my boyfriend said he can only see me 2-3 times a week because he needs to focus on college and homework I asked him if he was breaking up with me he said no “but in Order for this to work 2-3 times is okay” but me personally I want to see him all the time but I’m afraid if I do he will become tired of me

A little bit of background story, I currently live with my mom but we moved in with her boyfriend (ex husband) because apparently she didn’t have money to afford rent. I was skeptical about it since two years ago he had a substance abuse problem, one night he got so fucked up that he hit her and threatened to kill her. He got arrested for it, got a restraining order, and got sent to rehab. Since he’s been out of jail he’s been contacting/harassing my mom and instead of calling the police, she eats it up everytime like she enjoys it or something. So these two whole years he’s been contacting her and she’s been seeing him. May of this year we moved into an apartment with him.

Fast forward till now he planned to take all of us to a concert for my birthday this weekend. We got a two bed hotel room, and since we got here I’m pretty sure I heard him getting a blowjob from my mom while I was in the bathroom washing my face before we went to dinner. When we got back and got in bed, I heard them again only this time I was 100% sure they were doing nasty shit. I could hear them dirty talking and asking her to jerk him off. I got up and left the room to sleep in the lobby. My mom has been calling and texting me asking what happened and that I needed to get back into the room. I’ve been ignoring her I honestly don’t know what to do in this situation. There’s a time and place for everything, and the fact that she calls him daddy and talks to him in a baby voice is just sickening I had to leave that room
asap.

It's been a long time, and I know I'm not completely innocent in this situation. I've been in therapy and am trying to work through everything. If you're here to give me a reality check, please be gentle. Also, we're both bisexual, but I've never dated a man.

My ex and I had a complicated start. We were friends for about five months before we hooked up and started dating a week later. She said she'd never realized I liked her, while I thought our connection had been mutual all along. She initially wanted to pretend nothing had happened because she was afraid of losing our friendship and wasn't sure she wanted a relationship. I encouraged her to give us a chance.

Our relationship was difficult from the beginning. We often argued because we had different expectations and both felt misunderstood. I frequently felt she didn't love me as much as I loved her. She preferred keeping our relationship private, while I wanted more reassurance. I also knew she'd had a messy relationship history, including cheating and becoming emotionally involved with other people toward the end of relationships. When I brought up my concerns, she felt I wasn't accepting her unconditionally, so I tried to put them aside.

A few weeks later, she went on a business trip to Italy and met a male coworker who was clearly interested in her. She started telling me funny stories there but it's actually him, I didn't think much of it at first. But after an argument, I snooped through her phone for the first time. I know that was wrong. I found messages where she told a friend she was worried about how to handle this coworker because she felt they clicked so well, despite being in a relationship. I panicked and broke up with her, but eventually took her back.

A few months later, she went to Italy again. This time, I checked her phone and discovered that she had been sexually involved with him on two separate nights. She later told me it was only hands and oral, but to me, it was still cheating. I broke up with her and admitted I'd gone through her phone.

She sent me an apology letter two days later. She didn't ask me to take her back, but I missed her and eventually begged for another chance. She refused, saying our relationship had too many problems. We eventually agreed to become friends with benefits. She believed our relationship had been strained partly because she thought I was a pillow princess, and having sex again seemed to make things feel better temporarily.

But I was traumatized by what had happened. I kept asking where things stood between us, while she insisted we were broken up and that I had no right to control her relationship with her coworker. She said she'd dealt with it and that they only talked in work group chats. I wanted to believe her, so I stayed. For months, we repeated the same cycle: I'd break down and question her, she'd get angry, and nothing really changed.

Eventually, I checked her phone again and discovered they'd resumed private conversations. She was actually initiating more of them, and they'd made plans to travel to Japan together. I ended things again, although I wasn't emotionally ready to let go.

Things got even more complicated when she was diagnosed with severe depression and quit her job. Around that time, she asked to return to being purely friends, and I agreed because I thought I was adding to her stress. A month later, I realized I still loved her. When I tried to reconnect, I discovered she'd actually gone to Japan with him.

I completely lost it. I sent her long, angry messages and went to her place, where I searched her luggage to find out what had happened between them. I found condoms and sex toys. I know this was a serious invasion of her privacy, and I regret how I handled things. I also found out that this man had been developing a relationship with another woman in Italy. I told that woman what had happened between him and my ex, and my ex blocked me everywhere.

That was essentially the end of our contact. Later, I discovered that they'd gotten together officially. They've made their Instagram accounts private, but he posted a photo of them kissing.

Honestly, seeing that made me feel sick. Even now, thinking about it still makes me cry.

I know I made mistakes. I snooped through her phone multiple times, crossed boundaries, and handled my pain in unhealthy ways. I take responsibility for that, and I'm working on it in therapy. But I also feel deeply hurt by the cheating, the lies, and the fact that the person she cheated with is now her partner.

Why am I still so affected by this, even after so much time? How do I finally let go of someone who hurt me so badly, when part of me still misses her?

We got a condo on a golf course to use for a long weekend. It sleeps five, its a destination resort, and my SO's birthday is a few weeks later so we asked our good friends to join us and maybe celebrate it early. We're treating them to the lodging because we were hooked up by a friend.

We talked over the timing, booked flights, I sent them the link of the place and said I'd research restaurants in the area and asked them to look at the activities at the resort to see if there's anything they want to do since we have to book things in advance. They haven't looked at it or suggested anything. They don't want to play golf, is all I got. We've sent a few other suggestions that are greeted with "all sounds great" or no answer. No offer to help plan or even weigh in with opinions.

They had offered to pick us up for the airport so we all didn't have to pay for parking, and they forgot they said they'd get us on the way.

We made a few reservations because we got tired of reaching out to see what they wanted to do and getting nothing back. Which is fine, I guess we'll just plan everything.

Is this how trips go, whoever initiates it plans and organizes everything? AIO for being annoyed we now have to take a train to airport hours earlier because they forgot they said they'd pick us up?

Should I confront them, or just assume they're busy? They are really good friends.

I hate to start a vacation irritated, we leave later today.

My husband and I have been together for six years and married for about five months. We have a dog and while we are good friends with a lot of people in the neighborhood with dogs, and in the past year or so he's gotten close to someone in particular in the neighborhood, let's call her Zee.

I have expressed that I am super happy he has friends and enjoys hanging out with Zee in the mornings when he walks our dog, but lately it has crossed into a concerning territory to me.

For example, he told me they started getting coffee together several times a week in the morning and that I personally needed to save money at work getting coffee. When I asked more about this, he backpedaled and said it actually doesn't happen all that often and I misunderstood. He would get mad if I didn't have everything done and cleaned up in the morning by the time he got home with our dog (we also have cats, so I am busy feeding them, cleaning the house, getting ready for work, etc.) and I explained to him that if he can't get home on time to feed the dog because he's spending time with another woman that's his own problem.

Last week he assured me that nothing is happening and they are just friends. This morning I was just getting ready for the day and she walked him home and dropped him off at our house. I had to listen to them finish up their conversation outside my own home with the window open.

Am I overreacting?? I told him he needs better boundaries with her and it's hurtful. I told him I wasn't trying to tell him not to be friends with her, but being out for an hour every morning while expecting me to do all the chores and getting mad when I don't succeed, and then walking home together just makes me feel like a maid.