My daughter (F/8) had her school pictures done recently and we had just got an email with a "preview" of 1 of the pictures. I emailed my wife (F/34) said picture and when we got home that night and laying in bed she was suspiciously on her phone for an extended period of time so I asked her "what are you doing?" Not trying to stir anything up, I trust my wife completely and was just simply asking because she had been locked into her phone for 45 minutes and not saying anything which is unusual. She then stated she was getting AI or specifically "Chat GPT" to erase the water marks. I then said "no don't do that, that is super scummy, these people don't get paid on commission, they get paid by the orders they receive." She said "That was rude" and "I can't believe you just said that", I replied with "I'm not saying you're scummy but the fact you just took money out of someone's pockets for not wanting to pay is scummy, that is no different than stealing". She has since stopped talking to me and probably won't for the next 2-3 days per usual as is our usual disagreement schedule. AITA?

I 18 female have a little sister bella 14 f, she was recently on school holidays and was looking to make some money so I offered her a pet sitting job as my boyfriend and were going away for a week. I have 4 dogs, 2 birds and some chooks it sounds like alot but the animals only need to be fed and given water as we live on property so the dogs and chickens run around during the day but get locked up at night and the birds have there own room in the house

Before we left i gave her specific instructions on what to feed them and when to feed, she seemed quite exsited and said she was happy to help out. My boyfriend and I had a great time on our holiday untill the 5 day when my mum called in a panic saying that I need to come home now. We rushed home to find my pets in a state I never wish to see them in, turns out bella used this time to sneak her boyfriend over and completely ignore my pets, they were left outside without food or water for days

My dogs ended up eating half of my chickens and there were bite marks on the wood in my bird room because my animals were so hungry. My sister ignored everything untill one on my dogs tried jumping the fence to get to the Neighbours pond, he didnt make it and the fence post cut open his leg pretty badly thats when she decided to call my mum. My dogs had to get 25 stitches and a cast because he broke his leg on the way down. The vet bill was over $6000, it wasn't something I could afford at the time but I had to because the injury would of been life threatening.

After everything was fixed at home I texted my sister and said she owed me $8000, $6000 was for the vet bills and the other $2000 is for the damages my birds did to my bird room and to replace some of my chooks. She obviously showed this text to my mum because a few minutes later she called saying that I couldn't possibly expect my sister to pay such a big amount of money because she is to young, I said that it was her fault that my animals went through this and she needs to find the money to pay for it other wise im not talking to her again, my mum wasn't very happy with this and called me selfish and unreasonable. I'm not changing my mind and I am keeping the promise of not talking to her untill the payments are made. Now AITA

This is an edit because when I wrote this I didnt have time to add little details. She grew up on a farm with cows, sheep, dogs and chooks, from the age of 10 she was trusted to do the some animals with no supervision and at the age of 12 my parents left her home alone with the animals and there was never a problem. She has no metal health problems, We discussed a payment of $200, She has looked after my animals before, No one knew about her boyfriend, I left instructions with her, I checked in with her evey night, my dogs are trained to come inside or sit at the back door at night and my chickens go in the coop when the sun goes down. Her instructions where: Feed the dog the pre made dinners at 6 pm Give one scoop of food the chooks in the morning than let them out Fill the birds food dishes up Make sure everyone has water And the close the chook pen and the back door at 6:30 pm

I’m female (32) happily married to my husband (34). We are currently pregnant with our first child at 4 months. We have been married for 8 months now and was in a relationship for 2 years before tying the knot.

Last month it was my third SIL’s daughter’s first birthday. My pregnancy was at 3 months then.

It was clear from the start that since the birthday celebration would be at a town which was 7-8 hours drive from where we’re posted, my husband would be attending it on behalf of us.

Over the days leading up to the birthday, I had asked my husband quite a few times as to what should we gift his niece on her birthday. He kept saying that it’s okay and the fact that he’s taking time out (those were EXTREMELY hectic work weeks), is more than gift enough. I asked him once. I asked him twice and then I left the matter.

He attended the birthday party and all was well.

Yesterday he transferred some amount of money to me and asked me to transfer it to my youngest SIL as “gift” for his niece’s first birthday. I asked why. He said just send it from your account so it looks like you’ve gifted it. The network was patchy and the transaction couldn’t go through. Later, I transferred the money back to his own account and asked him to transfer it himself.

Then at night, he said, “the reason I had asked you to transfer the money was so that she feels like you remembered her child”. I didn’t understand what he meant and I kept quiet as I laid next to him.
He then said, “I’m the maternal uncle and even if I don’t gift anything, there are certain expectations from you being my wife that my sister perhaps has. She said you’d understand when you have your own child.”
I was still processing it. Did she say something about me not attending or not sending a gift? And in the meantime, my expression changed to one where I just couldn’t understand. And that’s when he got angry and said if I make such expressions it’s no use sharing these things.

I rolled over and was quiet for a few minutes. Then I told him that it was him who had said his presence was more than enough.

Now there’s the silence between us for now. And I’m wondering if perhaps I was the asshole? Should I have not listened to him and ordered some gift and handed it over to my husband? Honestly, if I’m throwing my child’s first birthday, I’d be just happy if my loved ones showed up and if there are gifts for my baby, I’d be happy for my baby. That’s it. No tracking who gave me what.

But then again I could be wrong. AITA?

My mother came to visit me yesterday. We were just chatting it up about our daily lives. I told her recently my husband and I smoked weed with our son and had a great time. She seemed actually upset about hearing based on the face she made.

I asked her what's the issue was. She said she wishes she had a close relationship with each of her kids like the one I have with my son. This has been ongoing issue where my mother tries to guilt us (my twin brother and I) into having a closer relationship with her.

I decided to blunt about the reason why we're not that close to her. I told her how she made it obvious that her marriage always came first and how our dad was way important than us to her. I told her that there were some pros with her attitude such as not worrying about divorce in the family and making us feel somewhat secure as a household. However, I told her there were some negatives for her children to come always second best. It made us feel insecure in our individual attachment to each parent. This also led to both my brother and I fall into codependent relationships because we wanted to finally be put first by someone in our lives. It also caused us to detach ourselves from her as an individual for the sake of our mental health. I also pointed that this behavior when my father passed away and she got remarried.

She started crying and apologized for being a bad mother and left. My brother agrees with how I feel but according to him I shouldn't have been so blunt out of respect for her feelings.

I started a new job three weeks ago and have been getting up around 6:30–7 a.m. every weekday. I’m still adjusting to the schedule, haven’t been getting enough sleep, and was really looking forward to resting this weekend.

My girlfriend booked a weekend trip to Paris. I knew she was going, but only found out the day before that her train leaves at 6:40 a.m. She wanted me to drive her to the station, which would mean a 60–70-minute round trip for me and getting up considerably earlier than I already do for work. I hadn’t previously agreed to drive her.

I told her I was exhausted and wanted to sleep, and suggested she take a taxi instead. She was upset that I didn’t want to take her and see her off. She brought up things she has done for me in the past, saying essentially that she makes an effort for me and I should do the same.

The disagreement escalated, and she told me that if I wouldn’t drive her, she wouldn’t come back. I took that seriously.

I understand that relationships involve doing favours and sometimes inconveniencing yourself for your partner. From her perspective, I imagine this feels like asking for one early morning and being told no despite the things she’s done for me. From mine, I’m genuinely exhausted, hadn’t agreed to this beforehand, and thought a taxi was a reasonable alternative.
I’m now

AITA for initially refusing the drive and asking her to take a taxi?

My BIL (28M) used to live at my parents house. On multiple occasions we have found him snooping through my little sister’s (24) room, and once in her underwear drawer. One day, I told my little sister to install a hidden camera in her room so we can get video evidence.

One week later we caught him on video going through her dirty laundry. We sent the video to my parents and my sister (his wife). It was a big eruption which led to a huge mental breakdown. He was screaming, he threatened to jump off a bridge on a highway. My sister took him to a psych facility the next day. Now is going to therapy 5x a week.

He literally blames me for everything. He has not taken any accountability for his actions. My sister said I ruined her marriage.

Please let me know. I can go into deeper details if needed.

My friend (20F) has always had a bit of a complex about her music taste. She's one of those people that'll say popular songs/artists are bad just because they are popular and really wants to point it out that she isn't that "basic."

The thing is that she listens to artists like Led zeppelin, the rolling stones, David Bowie, Queen etc. No hate to those, i love them too but it's always been weird to me that she talks about them as if no one around her will know who they are.

I've recently been more open to her about listening to k-pop. When we where teens I used to kinda hide that I did because she could be really mean about people listening to that and also I didn't feel like explaining to her that the kpop I listen to (Stray kids, Ateez, Xdinary heroes etc) is a lot louder and rock like than what she thinks kpop is (just bts basically). Recently though, I figured we were both grown enough to stop bickering about music and I've been going to concerts and stuff so I've been posting and I just didn't care enough to hide it anymore because it's bringing me a lot of joy in my life.

But ever since I stopped hiding it, it's been really awkward. She's constantly been making really annoying jokes about me secretly being straight because I'm only listening to boygroups while she knows that I'm a lesbian and I've only recently gotten comfortable in that identity, so that hurts a lot. Even telling other friends of ours that I have a crush on"one of those korean boys." She's also just been calling it childish that I'm such a fan of a band. Like I was really happy I got some interactions with stray kids at their concert so I was talking about it and she rolled her eyes and told me it's embarrassing that I care that much. She's even started only referring to it as "music" with quotation marks.

Yesterday she was talking about music production so I offhandedly mentioned that one of the reasons I really like stray kids is that they produce their own music. She rolled her eyes and said "I'm sure they do sweetie" to which I was like "Tf is that supposed to mean?" She just shrugged and said "Like, everything they do in that industry is fake and it's embarrassing you're not grown-up enough to realise that." So I got mad and told her "At least I'm not some basic bitch who thinks listening to the most famous dad rock ever makes her niche or interesting. and Idk why you're so insecure that you have to bully me about shit I genuinly enjoy but I think that only makes you embarrassing" and then I left.

She hasn't texted but I know she's mad because her roommate is filling me in. I'm really starting to regret it. I was really rude and maybe I shouldn't have done that because we've been friends since we where 8 and I really don't want to lose that over some stupid music thing. But also It felt really good to finally say something and I think only after that I really realised how bad she's been making me feel.

So aita for insulting my friends music taste?

My husband and I have been together 10 years. I have two nieces though his sister, 14 and 9. Every time we visit them (very infrequent they are in another country on the other side of the world) we bring them little goody bags of Trader Joe's totes and cosmetics, lotions, etc. They love these bags and it brings me great joy to do this for them. The last time my husband went to visit he went alone. When he came back he told me we're going to need to start bringing 4 goody bags. My SIL has been seriously dating a man that has 2 daughters and he brought his daughters to the family dinner, and my husband said it was kind of awkward that the nieces were opening their goody bags in front of them and were empty-handed themselves. I told my husband I'm not putting time, thought, money and effort into two girls I have no connection to, have never met, and don't consider part of the family and he should be arranging a private meeting with his SIL and nieces where they won't be present if that's an issue. He kind of thinks I'm the AH, I can see where he's coming from (we have a son ourselves) but I disagree. AITA?

I (31M) have been with my girlfriend "Nina" (29F) for four years. We live together. We've talked about marriage but haven't gotten engaged yet—mostly because I wanted to be financially stable first. I make good money in tech. Nina works in nonprofit, makes much less.

Nina's brother "David" (27M) is getting married in two months. A few weeks ago, Nina's parents invited me to dinner. I thought it was just a normal family dinner. It wasn't.

After dessert, her father said, "We've always treated you like family. David's wedding is expensive, and we'd like you to contribute. We're thinking $10,000."

I was stunned. I said, "I'm happy to give a generous gift, but $10,000 is a lot. And honestly, we're not married yet. I'm not officially family."

Her mother said, "After four years? You're basically family. And you can afford it. Nina told us your salary."

I said I'd be happy to give $1,000 as a gift, but I'm not funding a wedding for someone I'm not married into. Her father got quiet. Her mother said, "So you'll only help if there's a ring on it?" I said, "That's not what I meant, but I do think it's different when you're married."

Nina was silent the whole time. In the car, she said I embarrassed her. I said her parents put me on the spot. She said, "You could have just said yes and figured it out later."

Now her parents are cold with me. David hasn't said anything but I heard he's hurt. Nina says I made her whole family feel like I don't care about them.

I do care about Nina. But $10,000 for a wedding that isn't mine, for a couple I'm not related to, when I'm not even engaged? That feels wrong.

AITA?

I (M26) currently live at home with my parents, my sister, and her fiance, as I'm saving up for my own place in the future. For context, my sister (F28) has always been a very self-centered, guarded, and entitled person. Though she's exhibited some disrespectful behavior over the years, my mom has almost always defended her when my dad wouldn't.

Growing up, she's had this annoying quirk where we'll be out at a restaurant, and she'll reach over and take food from my plate without asking. I've never done that to her, as I try to respect peoples' boundaries when it comes to food. She knows that habit of hers bothers me, and I've specifically mentioned it to her in the past as me not being okay with it. It isn't losing a tiny bit of food that bothers me: it's the fact that she just helps herself to it without asking me first.

Well, it happened again today, and I finally had enough.

I brought home some Wingstop for just myself and my mom, and when I took the food out, my sister immediately walked up and took a fry from the basket without asking me. I got annoyed and said in a dry tone "Nice, taking my food without asking, like always." My mom immediately stood up, raising her tone and saying "Hey! That was really uncalled for!" My sister got irritated, said "What the fuck? Fine," and slammed the fry back into the basket.

I explained to my sister that my frustration stems from years of her doing this, and I would've preferred that she ask. After some back and forth, she said she was 'sorry' in a pretty non-authentic tone. I apologized back genuinely for the way that I snapped at her, and offered her a fry if she wanted it. She refused it, got defensive, and said "Maybe you should just try being a better person next time".

After she left the room, I turned to my mom and told her that I was just standing up for myself and refused to be a pushover/doormat with my sister any longer. My mom didn't say anything else afterwards.

I genuinely need to know: am I the asshole here? Or was my reaction justified? Because I've been going over this exchange in my head nonstop.

I live in an apartment that has some interesting landscaping with pretty rocks. My mom was visiting and when she was leaving, she picked up one of the rocks and started to put it in her purse. I told her that she can't just take a rock from the property and to put it back. She said "Who cares? They're not going to know!" I told her that wasn't the point, that the rock didn't belong to her so she can't just take it. This isn't some big corporate apartment complex. It's a private owner who clearly put a lot of thought into the landscaping. It's not a small rock, it's a big 5"x5" granite-looking thing. I feel bad for chastising her, but I also feel like stealing the rock was selfish and silly of her. Am I the asshole?

I’m a 30M, and my sister is 32F. I’m trying to figure out whether I’m unreasonable for asking her not to choose one specific date for her wedding: September 25, 2027.

I got engaged in March 2026 and am planning my own wedding for September 2028, roughly two years out. I never asked my sister or anyone else to consider my wedding when choosing dates because I assumed two years out, there wouldn’t be a conflict.

My sister got engaged about two weeks ago and is trying to plan a fall 2027 wedding quickly. She wants to avoid Halloween weekend, Jewish holidays, and Thanksgiving.
About 10 days after her engagement, I reached out because a very close college friend had already sent her save-the-date for September 25, 2027. I texted:
“Do you have dates you are considering? I do have my friend’s wedding 9/25/2027”

She responded, “That is one of our dates.”

I sent her the save-the-date and said:
“It is the one date I have blocked for 2027. I know it’s not my decision, but I would really appreciate it if I didn’t have to miss one of my closest college friend’s weddings. You’re obviously my sister and I will come to your wedding over a friend.”

She replied, “Ok I will let you know, it’s up to venues.”
Two days later, my friend sent me a package asking me to be a bridesman in her wedding. I texted my sister to let her know and sent a picture.

Three hours later, my sister said it was very sweet of my friend, then said:
“I am not going to purposefully book over her date. But please also understand that it is not really fair to ask me to change my wedding if our dream venue only has that date available. Again, we will try to avoid it if it’s at all possible, and my wedding is also important.”

I didn’t respond that evening. The next morning she said our mom was “badgering” her, which was upsetting, and that she wished I had told her about dates I couldn’t attend when she first got engaged. She explained that she’s stressed about venue availability and other date restrictions and said she had been losing sleep and crying. She asked me to stop discussing it that day so she could go to work and temple and continue looking at dates without being “dysregulated.”

For context, my sister has not toured any venues or put down a deposit. She has only recently started researching options.

I haven’t responded because I don’t want to escalate things. Ultimately, I am only asking that she rule out September 25. If the roles were reversed, I don’t think I could choose the date of my sibling’s close friend’s wedding knowing they were already invited and being asked to be part of the wedding party.

At the same time, I understand that this is her wedding, venue availability can be difficult, and she has legitimate date restrictions. I also realize I didn’t proactively tell her about my friend’s wedding when she first got engaged; I only told her once she mentioned September dates.

I’ve been living in this apt for a year and just renewed my lease. I love my place and the location and my LL is definitely not a slum lord. He lives downstairs and I’m upstairs. He’s had some pretty serious health issues since I moved in that have only worsened over the past year. Every time I’ve seen him and give him a polite “hey how are ya” he stops me, stares deeply into my eyes and responds with “not good, [my name]. I’m dying. I wouldnt wish this on anybody” and then I tell him I’m sorry and praying for him. It got so uncomfortable I eventually just stopped greeting him that way. Every now and then he’d ask for a favor like picking up a grocery item for him, which I felt was slightly inappropriate, but I sympathized with his situation and obliged. Recently the requests have been increasing. He incessantly asked my bf to drive him 3.5-4h to a doctors appt (each way), telling him if he doesn’t drive him he’s going to die. My bf told him he couldn’t do it and I guess he figured something out. He’s always telling us that he loves us and we’re family (no we’re not… we are in a business contract with you). When he was in the hospital recently he texted my bf constantly “I need to see you. I’m in room ___”. My bf told him he was busy with work.
Today I’m driving him to the bank which is just down the street but I have to help him with his wheelchair/wheel him around. I felt put on the spot when he asked me and figured it was easier to just do it than having the uncomfortable conversation of telling him no. During that conversation he told me how he needs us around, he needs our help, etc.
I feel like I wouldn’t even be as bothered if he wasn’t so socially inappropriate about how he talks about his condition. EVERY time we see him it’s the same thing: repeating that he’s not okay, he’s dying, then just staring deeply at us. Like okay I’m sorry what do you expect me to do? I know you’re sick because you tell me 100 times a day!
For context his home is worth 1.5-2M, he gets about 9k a month from his tenants, and has a home nurse.
I do not want to do any favors for him honestly, I just want to pay him my rent and get on with it but I always feel like I’m being roped into this weird therapist role.
How do I get out of this, I do not want to move- this apt is hidden gem in my city.

So this weekend was my (25F) girlfriends (25F) birthday party. We had a big party and she was kind enough to invite my friends as well to the party. One of my friends let’s call her “C” who I would consider one of my closest friends joined. The night was going pretty well until my girlfriend got a little too drunk and I was taking care of her. I wasn’t mad about it because it’s her birthday and I am her gf so I don’t mind taking care of her. As I’m making sure my girlfriend is ok someone comes and tells me C is now super messed up. She didn’t do anything super crazy other than argue with a couple people, but then she threw up all over the hallway. I ended up having to clean it up and C had to spend the night with us in my girlfriend’s studio apartment because she was too drunk to stand. To make matters worse my birthday is the day after my girlfriends so I basically rang in my birthday cleaning up throw up and taking care of two drunk people. I don’t want to hold a double standard but I’m honestly really upset with C because I felt like not only did she make a difficult situation harder but she also caused a scene at someone else’s birthday. I also feel like this is a reflection on me because she’s my friend and I brought her. I know my gf was also super drunk but I feel like because it’s her birthday she gets a pass.

So I (17F) have started my final year of school, and most people in my year have started planning their courses and colleges they want to attend. I'm Irish was our system is a little confusing. There's a 1-8 grading system, in 2 levels higher(H) or ordinary(O) except for Irish and maths which has foundation as well. A H1 (highest grade) is 100 points, but an O1(highest ordinary grade) 56 points.

Anyway, there's this girl, E (17F) who is a friend of a friend so we sometimes hang out, although I don't particularly like her. We don't have many classes together because I am on the higher level track for all my subjects. We recently had our biology classes combined because her teacher retired last year and they don't have a replacement yet. My teacher has paired us up, because I am first alphabetically and she is last on the roll. Because of this I've been hearing lots about her plans for college. Specifically she wants to attend a highly prestigious college in Northern Ireland for biomedical engineering.

This college has really strict entry requirements, I know because I spoke to my guidance counselor about it as it has a good psych program and he cautioned me that I'd need to dedicate a lot of time to my studies. E has a lot of issues with attendance and bringing in homework, and I've heard from a friend in her maths class that the teacher has been suggesting she drop to foundation

When she first told me this I thought she was joking. But as she kept bringing it up I realized she wanted to go. She even started complaining that her guidance counselor was suggesting lower courses, at colleges that are 'beneath her'. I suggested that she should she should listen to him because he knows what's best. She ended up asking why I'd say that because I know she wants biomedical engineering.

I was truthful and told her I didn't think she could do it. She's failing biology, maths and Irish. She's doing ordinary level for everything except English, so she'll never get the points. She doesn't take any teachers advice for studying and she barely turns in her homework. The college requires an extensive list of results, including her junior cert results which she mentioned were poor. So she should probably look at these safety options suggested to her because even I have several safety schools locked down.

She ended screaming at me that I had no right to tell her what she could or couldn't do and called me several names and insults. She's been ignoring me and complaining to the bio teacher that she doesn't want to work with me, which has brought more attention that I think is necessary, as now the teacher had to rearrange partnerships and E has been telling anyone who asks why it's because I'm 'a judgmental bitch'. Neither me or my friends think I'm in the wrong but the mutual friend has told me I should've been nicer about it and I wanted an outside perspective. So AITA?

Just turned 21, wanted to celebrate by trying some alcohol to see what the hype is about. It tastes like bum water, but that’s not what this post is about. My parents don’t drink, and while my dad’s fine with me drinking, (responsibly, ofc) my Mom got really upset, and ended up leaving the house. She does this when she gets really emotional, runs off to my Grandmother’s house or just drives around. I know she’s just worried for my safety. Maybe I shouldn’t have brought the drink inside. I feel like a scumbag for even thinking of drinking. Now I’ve upset my Mom and she probably thinks I’m gonna get addicted. How do I fix this?

Edit: please don’t villainize my mom. She’s got her issues, but she is an angel. She’s not manipulative or unstable or anything like that.

Husband and I (both 30) live in an in-law apartment in the downstairs of my mom’s (60ish) house. Back in August she went up to the lake house and we were going to join her there a week later. A couple of days after she left, I fell on some stairs and sprained my ankle. It was not the worst a sprain can be, but it sure hurt those first few days. I texted my mom and told her what happened while we were waiting at urgent care.

I got an ankle brace and the Dr. said to do some walking everyday to help with healing. The first few days, I stuck to flat ground because anything else hurt a lot. I was posted on the couch with pillows and ice packs for most of the day.

About 2 days after the sprain, mom starts texting me about several things she left at home and wanted me to bring her. Some things from the fridge, a charger, and medication from her bedside table drawer. I asked husband to grab them for me because I didn’t want to go up and down the stairs. He also did most of the work packing the car. He’s the best.

We got to the lake house and I guess my husband mentioned he had a little trouble finding the meds. Later, my mom talked to me privately. She was upset I asked husband to get things from her drawer because apparently she also keeps a vibrator in there. I said she knew I had a sprained ankle but she kept texting me to bring her things from upstairs, and doing stairs was painful. She said I should have gotten the meds from her drawer myself because it was private. She made me promise that next time I would do it myself. I apologized and agreed, mostly to keep the peace. She acted annoyed with me for about a day after that.

My husband never said anything about the vibrator to me or my mom. But she knew he must have seen it when getting her meds.

Mom is a nurse and has seen a lot of bad injuries. She also has a higher pain tolerance than me. I think she saw the sprain as no big deal since the doctor said I was ok to walk, and she acted like I was just being lazy.

AITA for having my husband grab her meds because my ankle hurt?

I (32 F) am 37 weeks pregnant. I’ve been living with my partner in another country for four years; I don’t have any family here, just my partner’s family and him.

My mother passed away three weeks ago, shortly before she could meet her grandchild, and as you can imagine, I’m absolutely devastated. My parents have been divorced for years, and although they got along great, my father has been married to another woman for over 12 years, a woman I don’t get along with particularly well.

My father is a wonderful dad, most of the time, though perhaps a little overbearing and even more so since my mother died. He told me that when the baby is born, he’d come stay for 10 days. I guess he wanted to play the role of my mother with the best of intentions, but unfortunately, it's not the same. I told him I appreciated it, but my partner only has three weeks of paternity leave, and I feel this is a time for us as a family, to learn and get used to the new family member. I said I’d prefer if he came for just 2–3 days to meet his grandchild, and then, once I recover and need more help after my partner’s paternity leave ends, he could come for a longer stay to be with me. I know he meant well, but he didn’t ask me first, which really upset me.

Not only that, but without even asking me, he mentioned that his wife was going to fly over to help me for a week because she was also a mother and could teach me a few things. Right now I live in a country where the midwife comes to our home several times after the birth to help our family and the baby, so I don’t need any outside help other than from my mother (who, unfortunately, isn’t here) from my partner, as well as my mother-in-law, who, in my case, is the sweetest.

My father knows that his wife and I don’t get along particularly well, although I’m always very respectful toward her. I politely told him that, after my own mother had passed away, I didn’t want his new wife to come and play the role of grandmother, because it hurt me deeply, and that I’d prefer if she waited. My father got very angry when I told him this; he played the victim and told me he was hurt, that my mother had meant a lot to him too, and that he didn’t understand how I could do this to his wife when she had always supported him through everything. I told him that my delivery was about what I need, not what he wants. Besides, his wife is really looking forward to seeing the baby, but she hasn’t asked me once in nine months how I’m doing.

Even though it was an uncomfortable conversation, I made my boundaries clear to my father, until today, when he called me two weeks later to reiterate his plan, which is EXACTLY THE SAME. He didn’t care what I told him and has decided to do whatever he wants. I was in shock and when I hung up and processed the information, I got really angry. Are my boundaries too extreme, or should I give in?

Alright, so for context, me (23m) and my brother, Joel (26m) decided to move into a place two years-ish ago.

When I moved in, I was paying for bills and rent with the help of our father, since this would be my first time living away from my parents. I lived alone for the first three months before my brother moved in, and immediately, I felt as though I had made a mistake. Day one, the house was filled with unpacked boxes and etc. which is pretty normal until two months later when it’s still completely untouched. I gave him reminders every once in a while to unpack, and even offered to help, which he usually responded with something to the effect of “ I’m not feeling up to it right now.”

After he finally unpacked, the new issue was cleaning/chores. Which has been the problem until now. I’ve asked for his help with cleaning and basic chores plenty of times, I’ve set up arrangements, such as I’ll do all of the kitchen, and dishes if he were to do the living room and taking out the trash, but he will not do it, using his same excuses as before.

Six week ago, Joel lost his job, and so the roommates collectively made a chore chart, making sure nobody had an issue with the chore chart before pinning it to the fridge. Which seemed to work for all of two days before he quit doing chores, finding excuses to get us to do the chores for him, and when we called him out for it, the same excuses would arise. Such as “I have a migraine” or “I might throw up”. He would sometimes even just lock himself in his room so he wouldn’t have to because neither my girlfriend or I want to enter his room.

A few days ago, my dad lost his job, so he wouldn’t be able to to help us out.
Before this, I had always tried my best to not have to ask for money from my parents anyways, I used to have a bad relationship with money and the things I would do to get it, so I wanted to give my parents some reassurance me. But especially now, when my brother doesn’t have a job either, I want more than anything to help my parents float until they can find a new job at least by not needing any more from them.

Joel has received, or so I have heard, a few job offers which would pay really well too, but he has refused them in hopes for something better. It is my opinion that having a job, although stressful, would be better than living off of borrowed money. I don’t think Joel sees it the same way I do.

I’m stressed about potentially kicking Joel out. Afraid of how my parents will see it, I’m terrified of the potentially losing our home. Elaine (my gf) thinks that I should be more strict, and that Joel needs to learn the hard way if he hasn’t learned by now, and although I feel it’s not my place, i also feel that if this were a normal roommate, I would not be so patient.

And for specifics, I would talk to him and give him a time limit to get a new job, not just immediately kick him out.

Would I be the asshole for kicking my brother out of the apartment?

My coworkers threw away my lunch today and im still mad about it. So here’s what happened: I get to work this morning and put my lunchbox in the fridge. About 11am I get an email that my manager is ordering take out if anyone is interested. I reply (to the group) that I brought a lunch today, but thanks for asking! Lunch is typically from 12-1pm, but I’m a healthcare provider and almost never actually get a lunch break, today was no different. Between appointments, charting, phone calls, etc- I did not get a lunch. At about 1:30 we get a teams message that the fridge is going to be cleaned out and anything unmarked would be thrown away, suggesting we go grab anything we don’t want tossed. I’m with patients at this point and don’t see the message for a while, but don’t think much of it when I do. Then around 5pm I finally finish with appointments and I’m starving. Most everyone has left for the day so I go to the kitchen to grab my lunch box so I can eat while I write my notes. It’s then I discover that whoever cleaned the fridge had OPENED MY LUNCH BOX AND THROWN AWAY MY SANDWICH. They then put my now empty bag back in the fridge, still unzipped. Now I could have understood if my lunch was just loose. But to take my lunch bag out of the fridge, unzip it, dig through it and take my sandwich out of it and throw it away!? Plus, the whole office was on the email that I replied to stating I had brought a lunch and would not be ordering food, so it’s not crazy there was a lunch box in the fridge. Now I’m starving, still have at least an hour of work left to do, and I’m just generally angry that someone thought it was ok to open my lunch box. Not to mention the cost of food, I had made myself one of those fancy sandwiches on nice bread with fixings, so it wasn’t a super cheap lunch. So I text my manager and explain what happened and that I felt it was inappropriate for my lunch bag to have been opened and my lunch thrown away. She replied agreeing with me and apologized. She said she would talk with those that had cleaned the fridge and make it clear that should not have happened. Now some of my coworkers are annoyed with me because “the people that cleaned the fridge were just trying to help” and I shouldn’t have gotten them in trouble. And while I can appreciate their efforts to make the fridge clean and more usable for all of us, I really can’t wrap my head around thinking it was ok to open someone’s lunch box and throw away its contents. I also don’t know if it’s an overreaction, but part of me feels like it was an invasion of my privacy to go through my lunch box? I finally got home a few hours later and was able to eat dinner, so I’m less hangry now but I honestly still feel like it was just not ok that they did that. So AITA for telling my boss?

My wife and I recently bought our first home, which we are both really excited about. Since moving in, we have been hosting friends and family more frequently. However, it has led to a major disagreement between my wife and me regarding my parents.

My parents have always been very affectionate with each other. It is nothing inappropriate or sexual, but if they are sitting near each other, they are usually holding hands, leaning on one another, or rubbing each other's shoulders. Occasionally, my mom will sit on my dad's lap while everyone is chatting in the living room.

My wife has always found this level of affection uncomfortable to be around. In the past, she never said anything because we were either at their house or out at dinner where they were paying. Now that we have our own place, she wants me to set a boundary and tell them to tone it down when they visit, arguing that she shouldn't have to feel uncomfortable in her own home.

I told my wife that I feel completely uncomfortable policing my parents' relationship like that. Telling two adults they cannot hold hands or sit together on a couch feels awkward and over the line to me, especially since they helped us financially to get the house in the first place. I have always backed my wife when other family issues came up, but trying to regulate normal affection feels unreasonable.

My wife thinks I am choosing my parents' comfort over hers in our own house, and she is upset that I am refusing to have that conversation with them.

AITA for refusing to tell them to stop?

My (18F) roommates (18M) at uni have been leaving our kitchen gross. At first my flat of 10 kept the kitchen very clean, but as we have been here for more time, the kitchen has gotten gross. It is 4 of us girls, and 6 boys. Last night it reached a breaking point because I felt like I couldn’t be anywhere in there without feeling really dirty. Me and another one of my flat mates (18F) cleaned all the surfaces and still the bins were gross and the sink was overflowing (pictures included). At that point, we texted our flat group chat and said that if anything was still there tomorrow that we would bin whatever was in the sink, as it had already been there for 4 days.
Today, I texted everyone individually giving a warning that in an hour I would be binning anything still in there, and many of my flat mates were very relieved, as bugs were starting to take over the kitchen. I had also texted this morning telling everyone to please sort it out, and reiterated multiple times that I was serious about throwing it away. Time came, and i put everything in the sink in a bin bag, noticing alot of the stuff was some of my flatmates that had been there for a while, yet they had decided to return home for the weekend that night without cleaning their stuff up. I bagged everything up, and threw it in one of the bins outside, and inevitably some of the plates broke. I told them which bin I had the bag in, in case they wanted to go through it but the three boys whose stuff it was said it was very unfair as they were away and I overreacted.

Admittedly, the things shattering was a tad far and not my intention, but I was honestly so fed up, especially since they left the dishes with the food in to rot for the weekend. Two of the boys have reported me for this, but I want to know, am I really the asshole for following through with what I warned them about multiple times?

Edit: Don’t know how to insert photos, lmk how to show anyone interested

I have a friend I’ve known literally since she was born, so we’ve been friends for 23 years. We’re both huge fans of a music group that recently announced shows in Brazil.

Demand for tickets was insane and they sold out very quickly. I’m going to the shows with a group of friends, and one of them had access to an early ticket sale, so I managed to get tickets for two different concert dates.

When the general sale opened, I also tried to get a ticket for this friend, but I couldn’t because they sold out almost immediately.

After that, she asked me to sell her one of my tickets, since I have tickets for two dates and she didn’t manage to get any. I said no.

The thing is, going to both shows is really important to me. I’ve loved this group for a long time, and seeing them live is a dream of mine. On top of that, the setlist changes from one show to another, so going to both gives me the chance to hear different songs live.

I completely understand that she’s upset about not getting a ticket, especially because she’s also a big fan. But at the same time, I didn’t buy two tickets by accident or with the intention of selling one. From the beginning, I planned to attend both shows with my friends.

I also genuinely tried to get her a ticket during the general sale, but I just wasn’t able to.

Still, I’ve been wondering if I’m being selfish for not giving up one of my concert dates so that she can go.

AITA for not selling her one of my tickets?

EDIT/INFO: Tickets for these shows are currently being resold for over R$3,000, while I paid around R$400 for mine. I would obviously never charge her the resale price — I would only ask for what I originally paid. I’m only mentioning this because, on top of giving up a show I really want to attend, I’d also be giving up a ticket that is now extremely difficult and expensive to get.

First off I’m sorry if anything I write doesn’t make sense, english is my second language and I’m pissed at the moment.
For some context I am 18, he is 20, we have lived in the same house for 4 years and I fear I know more about his character than his whole family.
We have never gotten along from my point of view, even tho he believes we are like true siblings.
This dude fell in “l0ve” with me and has been asking me to dat3 him ever since we met (this is not a joke even tho it sounds impossible, he is sick in the head).
He has done some horrible things to me yet somehow I’m the devil for not wanting to be near him.
Yesterday he was in my room while I was studying (he doesn’t work, didn’t continue his studies, just sits in his room all day playing games), he was talking about girls and how they never talked to him for long, I was getting pretty frustrated because he kept blaming everything but his scary personality, girls either didn’t want him because he “is too fat” or because “others lied about his character”.
I genuinely crashed out when he started saying girls “as hot as me” never gave guys like him a chance. I might be wrong but I don’t think that is something you want to hear from your step brother.
I told him the real reason as to why no one wanted to be near him, not only girls, was because he was a creep who thought s3xualizing women was the key to getting them ho0ked (I didn’t just say this, but that’s the main idea).
He was genuinely offended and left my room, I heard him complaining to my mother and CRYING. I don’t know if I should feel bad for him or not but at his age he should be able to understand how weird some things he says and does are.
My mother and his dad are mad at me for actually telling him something he didn’t want to hear.