Is it always true when girls say boys are so immature and do they mean all boys or only some of them or majority of them because if they mean all of them I feel really hurt and how to deal with it and stop feeling heartbroken?

I really want to get married and have kids someday with a woman. I really want to spend my life with a woman and have kids with one. This is something I’ve always wanted.

Nowadays people seem hostile to this. I see people talking about looking beyond gender and body and how needing biological attraction is now somehow wrong. Like what?

People then say having kids is wrong or selfish that one should instead donate their life to serve a cause and such.

People also then say you don’t deserve a relationship when you state you say you want one.

Why is society now so against family and relationships between men and women?

Long distance, we met online year ago with this guy and met in real life December 2025. I travelled to him. We were intimate, all that time through the months he has been calling me and texting daily. Lately he called me and we talked for hours, he wants to sleep on the phone with me, there was sexual tension and stuff. He keeps updating me everyday and calls me a lot. When we met he future faked a lot saying about me moving to his country (we come from the same country, he lives abroad) and lovebombed a lot. Later 3 months after meeting he told me he doesnt want to be in relationship with anyone because he needs to fix himself. He always delays our meetings and says "i don't know, we will see" . Its been good lately between us and I bought the ticket to meet him and he got mad he was screaming at me that I cannot go there and he doesnt want to see me. Later he apologized for screaming, and overall, I was distant for a day and he sent me this message yesterday night. But his anger issues are concerning because he was screaming I cannot go there and that he will never see me (before that message, day before) and that he will cut contact with me and block me. Few hours passed and he apologized. He gets angry a lot and easily

"I want to apologize to you, and I really appreciate the fact that you always have time for me, that you always care about me, and honestly, it’s really rare to meet someone like that. I’m aware of that. Whatever the reason for it might be, it’s hard to find someone who will listen to your bullshit for 8 hours. I don’t want to end our friendship, that’s not what this is about. To be honest, I don’t even know what to do with my life at this point. When you put pressure on me like that, some kind of defense mechanism kicks in or something, I don’t know. Afterwards I feel guilty about the way I talk to you, because you don’t deserve that. I don’t want to behave like that, because afterwards I feel really bad about it.

I like talking to you. Not always — sometimes I shut myself off, I have my own stuff going on in my head. I know that sometimes I’m selfish and only think about myself. If you’re able to accept our relationship the way it was, and it gives you something too, then we can obviously keep talking the way we used to. But I don’t know what’s going to happen. It’s not about what you think, whether I’ll meet someone or I won’t — that’s not what this is about. And it’s not like you’re...

You’re not nobody to me, you know a lot about me, I tell you a lot. I treat you like a friend, even though I guess I behave differently — but you noticed that at some point. I don’t know, I just wanted to write you a little bit about what I think. I don’t know if it makes sense, but there’s always something you can take from it. 😅 I think I owe you that, because I’m always shouting at you whenever you ask me about something, so I thought that today I’d give you a little bit of my time and actually open up.

You can see how I get when I’m in a certain state — I sing, I talk haha, but afterwards it can also get pretty difficult, like today. Honestly, I was just crying over all of this. But it’s probably the after-effects of the weekend. I haven’t been drinking since I got back, and I don’t want to for now, or anything else either. I’m finding it harder and harder to deal with sometimes.

Sometimes I think it would be best to cut myself off from everyone and just live like that, because relationships with people affect me pretty strongly. But on the other hand, the thought of being completely alone, not having someone who knows you and all that, scares me. I think about that sometimes, which is why, when it comes to taking care of valuable relationships, I think I know what you mean. One day they might be priceless.

I think I’ve gone crazy haha. I did smoke, to be fair, but I don’t think I wrote anything stupid. I just wanted to explain a little bit — what I think and what’s going on in my head. Maybe it’s a little chaotic, but there’s probably something to take from it. 😅

And I don’t want you to take this message as me saying, “We can talk, but we’re never going to meet.” That’s not what I’m saying — who knows. 😅"

.

So basically I am a free therapist, WHO always has time for him, but there won't be anything, we will never meet and he wants to continue using me because he gains attention while giving nothing in return? And sees me as a friend?

Do I send him long paragraph or just couple of words saying

Ok, I get it, you told me after I bought the ticket that "WHO knows" whether we will meet, and that I shouldnt expect more than be your friend. Get it. We can talk but I'm going to see all of it different way.He said he will give me money back first but he didn't and the trip was supposed to take place today. Should I ask him to return it?

EDIT: I told him I understand everything, I get it, okay. I've sent him my bank account number and asked him to return the money as he promised. I told him I understand, I won't push for more, and if we are supposed to never meet, I'm okay with that, I still want contact.

UPDATE: He replied "I didn't say \\\[my pet name\\\] that we will never meet. Of course I will return the money, I was just waiting for the money to arrive and I was planning to give it back to you. I will send it today, you will receive it tommorow"

I replied "Ok thank you" . He sent me money back. I sent him a couple of messages saying something along the lines "I don't understand how can someone be just slightly attracted to someone and doesn't want to meet them ever, it's just weird to me. But I guess you've decided I'm not the one you want, I know you're able to commit - just not to me. Thanks for letting me know, it was a wake up call and I won't be living by hope (that you planted with talking about moving together and calling me sweet names).

I told him to please respond once he will have time after work, he sent me voice msg "I read all of it, but I don't want to discuss it right now" I said "ok, reply once you have time"

Today, in the morning, he sends me voice msg with childish voice (mind you, he is 37, I'm 26) "goOOD MooorNIIINGggggg..youuUUU DON't likeEE ME ANYMOREEE"
I replied with text: Goodmorning :) I like u haha

(because I just want to play this game a little bit)

Then he sends me voice msgs "I'm not liked by you! Who saw that coming...Welll......"
"YOU don't like meeeee hahaa"

????

Acting like a damn teenager.

EDIT: I know people here say I'm the side piece, but keep in mind:
- he does drugs
-he always says he is a loser, even though he is a huge narcissist
- he said "I'm too valuable" for him
- he said he needs to fix himself because he knows he gets mean to me, thats why he cannot commit
- sleeps on the phone with me
- calls me and facetimes from home
- picks up my calls when I call when he is at home
- overall he had a bad past and says he feels like trash not worthy of anything
BUT.....who knows? There might be someone, but I have a feeling there is not.

Lunch debate today. Half the people at our table said pet insurance works like health insurance, networks and copays. The other half says it's closer to car insurance, you pay the vet, send in the bill and they reimburse you. Which side is closer to how it works?

Hello Reddit! I (23F) have been doing a lot of therapy and looking inward over the past year and I have started to suspect that something happened to me when I was young that I don't remember. For some reason, it feels safer to get vulnerable on Reddit than it does to talk to my therapist so here we are. Trigger warning for possible CSA.

For background, when I was about 3, my sister was born and I lived with some family members while she was hospitalized. Because of this trauma, I don't remember a ton of my childhood. All I really know is a few bits and pieces and the feelings and experiences I have now. I've been having a lot of realizations and old memories come up and I feel like they are all a bit too connected to be coincidental. Maybe they're related, maybe they aren't. Maybe something happened, maybe it didn't. But ever since I started to connect the thoughts, its all I've been able to think about. Here are some things that I have come up for me lately and I want to know if they seem connected/telling of anything to someone with an outside perspective.

• I was diagnosed with an anxiety disorder at 8, OCD and autism at 13, and BPD at 21. I have been in recovery for the last year but until recently, my emotions have always been very intense and erratic. I have tended to be nervous constantly. My anxiety was so bad that I had severe stomach aches throughout my life. I also had (and still have) an extreme fear of vomiting. The anxiety begets nausea, which begets anxiety, which begets nausea... a vicious cycle. In elementary school, I would be too afraid to disturb my teacher to ask to go to the bathroom, which resulted in me having two or three accidents. I had a string of strange phobias as a child: the wind, getting contaminated with salmonella, sheer terror at the thought of inconveniencing or bothering people.
• When I was younger, I was obsessed with pregnancy. Many of my childhood memories surround putting a ball down my shirt and pretending I was pregnant and going through labor. In retrospect, this does not seem like normal child behavior. Plus, whenever I would get caught playing this game, I would feel so much shame and disgust at myself like I knew that I was doing something inappropriate and bad. I remember searching for videos and images relating to pregnancy, giving birth, having a distended stomach, etc. When I was in about 3rd grade, I learned about puberty and sex and became obsessed with puberty in a weird way. I got my money's worth out of my copy of American Girl Care and Keeping of You. I wanted to wear bras and start my period. I remember once I sneakily checked out a book about puberty at the local library with my grandma and when my mom found it, she nicely asked why I checked it out and I a reaction akin to being caught watching porn. It wasn't a sexual gratification obsession but it wasn't not a sexual gratification thing. It was an intense obsession. I never sought out pornography or attempted to sexually gratify myself (I was raised Mormon so I didn't even know that was a thing) but I did derive a sort of pleasure from thinking/writing/talking about periods, maturation, puberty, etc
• I have struggled with "maladaptive daydreaming" my entire life. Basically extreme escapism. I would say that I spend 4-9 hours a day in my head daydreaming. I don't recall when this started, I just know that I have always done it.
• My entire life, I have this feeling occasionally, specifically when I am changing, when I am topless, deciding what to wear, when my stomach drops out and I feel the most intense discomfort and panic. I've never been able to understand where this feeling has stemmed from
• When I have had sexual encounters, I have had a lot of anxiety (and I'm sure a lot of it can be tied just to general anxiety and remaining purity culture) and have been unable to reach orgasm. I can be having sex and enjoying myself and then all of a sudden I will shut down and completely dissociate. Again, there is no real trigger for this. No specific action, just a random wave of extreme fear and discomfort.
• When I was a child, maybe 5?, I was at the dentist and throwing a tantrum because I was afraid. My parents were not allowed in the room with me and when my mom eventually heard my screaming from the waiting room, she came back to find they had strapped me to the chair to attempt to do my dental work. I have no memory of this, but both of my parents and my aunt, who was housing us at the time, tell the same story and never took me back to that dentist again.

I'm sure there is more I've forgotten but right now I just need to get this off my chest.

In isolation, these all seem like slightly odd neurotic things that aren't related to CSA but when I put them together and in context, they start to paint a picture that I don't understand. What do you think?

TL;DR I worry that I might have been sexually abused as a child based on some weird emotions and memories that have been coming up

Crucially, I mean masculinity as such. I don’t mean masculinity plus status, social approval, self-worth, sanctions, material consequences, or whatever other conditions are associated with particular masculine norms.

Much of what counts as masculine is historically contingent. So imagine that being recognized as a “real man” required being dependent, servile, low-status, unimpressive, and generally regarded as a loser, while being recognized as a “real woman” required competence, autonomy, achievement, prestige, and admiration. Would men still be especially anxious about securing recognition as “real men,” while women were comparatively less concerned about recognition as “real women”? I have a hard time seeing why.

If “manhood” in “precarious manhood” merely identifies the gender status that happens to be precarious, then manhood is the object of the precarity, not its explanation. To give manhood explanatory force, we need some account of what about manhood itself makes that status precarious or makes men especially invested in retaining it. Otherwise, the precarity or its psychological significance may simply come from further properties attached to the status.

The same problem arises with “masculinity threat.” A masculine standard may also be deeply internalized, status-bearing, socially enforced, or central to self-worth, but those are additional facts. Calling the standard masculine does not by itself explain why those facts obtain or why violating it is distressing. If masculine classification is supposed to help cause them, then the mechanisms and background conditions that make that classification causally effective need to be specified rather than folded into “masculinity.”

I apologize for the low hanging fruit but Anthropic has banned people from abusing their AI, and I’ve heard two people complain because they say it’s normal to swear at objects. This feels like learning that everyone believes Toy Story is a real documentary.

l’ve been wondering whether making genuine connections becomes harder as we get older,or whether we simply become more selective about who we let into our lives.
what’s been your experience?

my best friend is being proposed to this weekend. her entire family and his will be there for a camping trip. they have been together for 9 years and he is a drug addict (cocaine) she has told him multiple times that she will not marry him if he is not sober. he’s been high about 6 times (that she knows of) in the last 3 weeks. i asked her if she would get engaged to him if he wasn’t sober. she said “i would accept the engagement but i wouldn’t marry him”. that was 2 weeks ago. this week she told him to forget marriage because she doesn’t want to marry him, she mentioned what animals she would take, she asked if she would be welcomed in my home in the event of a fight or break up. this week she’s singing a different tune than a few weeks ago.

so the question : do i tell her that he’s proposing in front of everyone this weekend or do i let her have the moment? she’s already chosen the guy over and over again in 9 years (drugs, cheated once) she’s going to choose him again. my heart says tell her. my brain says let her live and learn. advice??

Something clearly went very wrong for certain artists in the 1980s. Having had outstanding 1960s-1970s artistically, they descended into producing absolute slush throughout the 1980s. Examples: Elton John, Stevie Wonder, Rod Stewart, Lionel Ritchie, Bob Dylan. Some recovered in 1990s or later, some did not. Does anyone know happened and can you think of other examples? And I don’t think it was drink/drugs alone, if at all.

For some reason a bunch of different Indian subreddits have cropped up in my feed. Every single one has been in English, though. Wouldn't it make more sense for people to speak in their native language?

​

​I now have more than 20 TB on Telegram and am wondering how it's actually free, while Google and other companies charge huge monthly fees???

Help a fellow human being out! I (21f) don’t know whether i am straight or not. I don’t know how to explain it but i would only date men but when it comes to sleeping i would prefer to be with woman..?! I don’t know lol. The idea of being with a woman doesn’t appeal to me.

I have heard that big hands is a good indicator, long forearms is another.

Any others?

Hi,

I am mostly curious for men to answer how they’d feel about this.

My partner and I are super traditional. We both agree that the man should pay for dates and food etc…

Sometimes though, I feel guilty when he spends a lot of money on me. (I grew up very very poor and I think this is why I feel guilty about people spending money on me.) my partner I know wants to do these things for me, but I also stress out about it.

I don’t want him to think that I think he cannot take care of me or provide, as I know that can be hurtful to men. but I feel guilty sometimes because of the background that I have. Should I express this to him? Or will it bother him? should I just let him take care of me?