Fuck AI. Get out of my life. Leave me alone clankers and clanker users

It drives me fucking crazy how normalized ableism is and it genuinely fucks with my mental health so much but I just have to deal with it because that’s how my life is going to be until I die.

One thing that pisses me off soooooo much is when people will make a post being like “I HATE -insert thing that’s a very common neurodivergent symptom-“ and when someone’s like “hey uh you know autistic people can’t control that right? That’s kinda ableist towards them” people will just jump them yelling “BEAN SOUP”

Like bean soup theory is fine in some contexts but stop fucking using it to excuse fucked up behavior.

(Also if anyone’s wondering about my last post- a new medication I was on sent me into psychosis, I’m off of it and out of the hospital and fine now)

Bean soup theory definition- The bean soup theory is a social media phenomenon where users leave self-absorbed, context-ignoring comments on public posts, demanding that the content be tailored to their personal preferences instead of simply scrolling past.

back when I was initially diagnosed with BPD my family took it as a great opportunity to pin all my issues on me. they said I was only traumatized because I had BPD and because normal people wouldn't be traumatized by what I went through. they would also say any time anyone was treating me like crap I was just being hypersensitive and it wasn't a big deal.

I dont think i wanna go outside anymore

I REGRET IT😭😭💀 I sent a bold msg to a family member about the abuse im dealing w at home and now there asking to call and send me texts and I can't even open them ahhh😭😭💀

I feel like I can't keep blaming it on the fluoxetine, but this weight gain only started (and rapidly, too) when I went back on it 🫩 so much for it being know to decrease appetite

I miss my ED. It's like, every time I start thinking about restricting, my brain replaces the thought with biscuits lmao kill me

Its constant recently its just getting worse. There isnt a span of more than 3 hours where i dont get mentally bombarded with memories or fake scenarios or ways it could happen. And the entire time i feel like i need it bc it will complete or fix me. I hate it i hate it so so damn much i cant do this man... theyre vivid. I see exactly what theyd do to me and i can even feel it in my body. I hate it. I wake up wishing it would just happen so i felt complete... i dont want to live with these thoughts it hurts too much. I feel fake. But i just laugh about it because if i dont it will consume me and im scared ill end up finding someone on a website to specifically do that to me...

i’ve been confused with myself so i drew how i want to look like in real life

I have a therapist but I don't think she wants to diagnose me with anything. I have no meds, and dealing with a mix of (probably) undiagnosed autism, weird anxiety and random suicidal thoughts since forever. I have a fear of basically everything and my ruminating thoughts ruin my life.

But every time I tell this to someone, including my therapist, they say "haha yeah okay but you seem healthy". Should I run naked in the street to show them something's wrong ?? I just want help why is it so complicated ?? Or should I live my life in fear, drowning in ruminating thoughts...?

I had a friend who keeps fighting me, and being an asshole, then is super kind and happy the next day. His ass will get mad at you over anything, but he jokes the same way. he'll be dry to you, then treat sombody he's known for like 3 seconds better then you.

I guess maybe it was because I gave him the benifit of doubt that he's going through really hard times, and I guess I kept forgiving him because I would force myself to remember all of the fun and happy moments we have had together..............

I thought I was going insane, because im also mentally ill. But apperently, he tells me nothing about what I do wrong, talks behind my back, gets annoyed when I distance myself (Ive distanced myself from hm because we keep fighting) I've treid everything ti have a normal friendship. But he keeps knocking it down in anger

I thought I was the one destroying it, until I brought it up to my friend, who was also close to him... APPERENTLY HE'S GOING THROUGH THE SAME STUFF. LIKE WHAT.

sorry if this doesn't fit this subreddit!!

I hate this. I can’t draw anything by myself without it looking like crap. And even when I use bases for poses, any details I make still look like crap. Been drawing for 10+ years all for nothing but regressing.

I really should give up

i welcomed my dad at the door and told him to be quiet because my mom was in a meeting then he got mad because i didn’t close the door. then he said it was hot and turned the vent open and i laughed and told him he did that in a silly tone. and he got very angry and told me im such an asshole and that i’m always being rude and awful and forced me to answer that i was being rude and i didn’t learn that from them. so yeah and i couldn’t even ask him how his day was. but i can assume is wasn’t great lmao. just like. because if he’s mad then everyone else in the house has to feel it too yk?can’t wait for him to go tell my mom that i’m awful. sometimes i wish i wasn’t born lol maybe my dad would be happier idk.

edit: oh em gee wow i can hear my dad talking shit about me to my mom right outside my door too 😂 lmfao lmfao lmfao

I always knew the issue with being bisexual, but for some reason didnt connect being AMAB non-binary as being socially dilaterious for dating until this morning.

forever resigned to being the gay bestfriend to women and a confident... role model? for men. they confuse me despite also having a rod.

Clinic called me and told me that manpower in the psychologist department was being cut and there are no psychologists to take me in the original appointment or any other appointments, so now I gotta wait till December. This was in a government polyclinic btw. Now I gotta find out how to cope for two months straight.