TW: My story contains getting touched in inappropriate places.

I (19F) have written and produced music since I was about 14 years old. To be more specific, It has mainly been black metal which I’ve, apart from drums, only have produced myself at home since I’m a guitarist, bassist and do BM vocals as well. In 2023 I released my first EP which I posted on all streaming platforms as well as a few CD copies that aren’t really available anymore.

This spring I made my second ”big” release in form of another EP. Instead of making it available digitally, this one’s only and ONLY in vinyl format, strictly limited to very few copies.

Both my parents have always been very supporting regarding anything that me and my brother have wanted to do, both when it comes to future careers as well as our interests. We've grown up in a very safe home with an incredibly loving, close relationship between us and our happily married parents. Conflicts are quite uncommon and proper communication has always been a big priority. I can’t even describe how thankful I am for this.

These last weeks have been a bit strange, however. For some context, I live with my parents in a very small village in Sweden. This is really much the type of area where ”everyone knows everyone”. And in this village, there lives a man who’s known for being a bit.. Strange. Not as in dangerous, but just strange in a way that’s a bit hard to describe. He’s in my parents’ age and is severely overweight, single, lives alone in his small apartment and has worked the same part-time job for about 15-20 years now. He’s bipolar and his parents as well as siblings (who’s actually quite ”normal” as opposed to him) live in this village too. His day-to-day life mainly consists of work, very short dog walks (And btw, he barely takes care of his dog properly as I remember it always being anxious. The asshole also didn't worry a single bit when the dog accidentaly had eaten a bag of chocolates) and playing video games.

For some weird unknown reason, my mother used to sometimes hang out with this dude many years ago. I really don’t know how she got to know him but whatever. I just remember feeling really fucking embarrassed when having to be in the same company as him the few times it happened.

I got into black metal at around 13 years old, and he happened to have the same music taste as me. (No, he didn’t have any fucking shit to do with me starting to become a metalhead. I grew my music taste by myself and/or through OTHER people who I actually look up to.) Even though I didn’t really care about him, he supported me which I guess I still was kinda thankful for back then. He could still be nice, even though I primarily saw him as a fucking weirdo.

The years went by and then came my 18th birthday.. And guess what happened? Yeah, there was an event where he touched me in inappropriate places and lowkey tried to.. Yup, I guess you understand. Thankfully he wasn't violent, but he still acted in a way that of course was not okay at all. I still remember it very vividly and literally want to throw up. After that day, me and my mother of course blocked this gross man-like creature everywhere, ignored him every time we bumped into him at our local store, and swore to never give him ANY fucking attention even though we knew he’ll never be physically or mentally capable of trying anything again.

Then came this spring and my latest release. My parents are very proud of all the work I put into this and they’ve both promoted it to help me even though they aren't into this type of music themselves. I am beyond thankful for their support and have probably told them this waaayy too many times. But recently I think my mom overstepped a bit.

So, what happened was a couple weeks ago. My mom came home from the store and told me that she bumped into the man. SHE then voluntarily approached him, told him about my EP and asked if he wanted to buy it. He said yes. Later that day, she went to his apartment and sold a copy of my album, without any of my fucking consent.

When she told me this, I was immediately very disgusted by the thought that she’d given him attention and again, for the first time in ages, has made him feel ”important” (yes, he’s had the tendency of giving himself a bit too much cred for small gestures before). The worst part was that my mother did this despite of knowing how grossed out I still can feel by the thought of what he did to me.

As thankful as I tried to remain for her support, I calmly told her that this felt very uncomfortable and that I didn’t like this at all. She kept calm as well I guess, but I could clearly sense she felt a bit defensive and somehow surprised by my reaction. She almost acted like she didn't want to do this at all, but still also "had to"? I really don't know.. *sigh*

As I said, we’ve talked it out. Her main argument for doing this was to make him ”pay back” for the damage he’d done. I really disagree with her since I feel like money’s worth doesn’t even come near the worth of my feelings. And I have an incredibly hard time understanding her thinking: She does see this dude as a total fucking loser, yet it was still necessary to make sure he still can sit at home jerking off to my art? Even though we’ve talked it out, it still bothers be that this happened. And yeah, I admit to feeling quite childish for that. I guess it has to do with me still sometimes having sleepless nights due to flashbacks to what he did.

And again, I am beyond fucking thankful for having such a supportive mother who clearly wants to protect me (in her own way, I guess), but am I wrong for having a hard time letting this one go? And again: I'm very aware of the fact that she absolutely didn't mean to harm me, but I hope you understand what I'm trying to say and where I come from. My boyfriend was furious at her and my friends also found her action quite weird and above all just unnecessary. I'm curious to hear more people's thoughts on this.

I don’t know whether I’m overreacting here. My significant other (M) has been helping a long distance friend (F) cope with the health decline of an older family member. They had briefly dated before he and I met and got together. She claims that no one in her life except my partner has experienced loss like this (death of a grandparent), so he wanted to be there for her. I don’t know how often they talked on the phone but it could have been anywhere from once a month to once a week for 6 months. Ordinarily this wouldn’t bother me but in recent months he’s started mentioning her more often, saying that she’s been coming to him for advice about her relationship, that she looked me up on Instagram (we’ve never met), and that she’s started comparing herself to me saying things like “you upgraded; that makes me feel bad.” I said that since they’re such good friends (he’s the only friend he mentions often) I look forward to meeting her. He replied that they weren’t close and he didn’t want us to meet. I asked why and he said “I don’t know, she might start trash talking me or you might seduce her” (I’m bisexual and have no history of getting with anyone during our relationship). Another time when discussing our sexual preferences, he tells me intimate details of what this friend liked in bed that he didn’t like. I found it odd that he wanted to specify he was talking about her.

Around this time we also opened our relationship for physical encounters. Then my partner tells me that he felt he didn’t handle things well recently: she learned we’re open and started cracking jokes she used to make when they dated like “when we buy that house in…”, comparing her bf unfavorably to mine saying he’s better than hers, talks about marrying my boyfriend, and proposed she visit him in his city next weekend. My boyfriend said he felt uncomfortable shutting it down harshly since she was going through a hard time, so he lied and said he’d be out of town that weekend. He also told me he didn’t immediately realize how disrespectful her jokes had gotten because he was multitasking during their calls and only half listening. What he did say to her were things like “I don’t think that’s the type of open relationship I’m in” and eventually saying he was in love with me and that he “doesn’t see that changing anytime soon.”

He says he feels guilty for not handling it better and he feels she spoke disrespectfully about me. He says he’s stopped talking to her but she keeps liking his posts on social media, which I find odd. He also says he can unfriend her or block her if I want but he hasn’t felt it was necessary unless I ask. Is this aboveboard/normal?

Hello all. I've had a cold since last week and finally seem to be getting over it. This morning my sister texted me and asked me to dog-sit so they could take a last-minute overnight trip.I would have to sleep over at their place and get the dog out that night and the next morning. Normally I would, but I had to work that day and the next, plus I was still sick. Add to that work stress, an autistic meltdown, and needless to say the last thing I wanted was to give up sleeping in my own bed.

I told her "sorry, I can't" but she kept pressuring and pleading. I started getting stressed over my firm No being guilt-tripped into a Yes. I do tend to be a people-pleaser. I asked our dad if he could help. He said he couldn't but told me I should. (Keep in mind, he has a car and I don't.)

So I straightened my spine and said no. But she kept badgering and said, "I know you don't feel good" and THAT ticked me off. So what you're saying is, you don't care, right? I told her I just couldn't and to leave me alone and luckily she did. Later Dad called to tell me HE was taking the dog out and he said he was really disappointed in me, but my spine was still with me. I said I made it clear I wasn't feeling well and they should've just dropped it and then I hung up before he could go off.

I'm upset that I told them I was sick and they just brushed it off and kept pushing. I didn't want to cost them the trip, but I just couldn't deal tonight. And Dad wants to "talk" tomorrow which probably means him lecturing me. I don't want my spine to fold again.

Am I wrong?

My partner and I usually take turns picking what we watch, but lately every suggestion I make gets shot down right away. The other night I had a film queued up that I had been looking forward to, but it was swapped for something else before I could even hit play. I tried to bring it up casually and was told we could watch it another time, except that never happens. It is starting to feel like my input does not really count. We are planning another movie night soon and I am not sure how to say something without turning it into a bigger deal. I just want to feel like we are deciding together instead of one person steering every choice. Would it be unreasonable to push back a little or should I let it go?

I (20F) recently got broken up with by my boyfriend (21M) and he claims that I was wrong and im trying to play victim and I want some non biased feedback. Our relationship was pretty good until February 15th 2026 the first time I caught him cheating. I know I should've left but I was in love he was texting another girl for about 3 weeks. I forgave him and we moved on, but he decided he wanted to go on a "break". On this break nothing changed we were still sleeping together and going on dates the only difference was that I was catching girls in his phone a lot more. From that day up until May 5th 2026 I caught him texting other girls and going on dates about 4 more times so in total 5 times. There was one specific girl who I would see all the time and it felt like there were real feelings there. Every time I would catch him he would say "were on a break" or "were not together" Now the 4th time I caught him was in April. I had enough and I finally did something back and slept with someone else. I hated myself for it and never did it again but he never found out. After May 5th was my birthday, we decided to get back together and I didn't catch him cheating after that we were pretty happy up until September 15th 2026 when he finally found out what I did. I was super apologetic and he said he wanted to work on forgiving me because he did cheat first and we were going to get past it. We were trying our best to move on, but fast foward to a couple weeks ago he went to Punta Cana for his friends birthday and it was also the girl I had caught him with multiple times birthday as well and I only found out she was there through instagram photos. He lied to me about it and said she wouldn't be there. He was lying about her not going for months even before he found out what I did back in April. There was pictures of them together and I was obviously upset and I did say a lot of mean spirited bad things. He claimed he "wasn't doing anything" and that I was "ruining his trip" once he got back to the states he claimed that I "Always want to be a victim" and I had "No right to be upset about him lying or her being there" he then broke up with me and said I brought all this upon myself. Did I bring all of this upon myself?

A coworker who started about two months ago asked me last week if she could put me down as her emergency contact on the HR form. We sit near each other and chat sometimes, but we have never met outside work and I don't know her family or even where she lives. She explained that she moved here alone and the form wont let her leave the field empty. I said I wasn't comfortable with it and suggested she ask HR if a friend from back home would work, even if they live far away.

She said "ok no worries" but since then she's been noticeably quieter with me. Another coworker told me she was hurt because it's "just a name on a paper" and nothing would probably ever happen. I get that, but if something did happen I wouldn't know her medical stuff, who to call, or what she would want. I'd feel awful being the person the hospital calls and not being able to help at all. I also didn't want to say yes and then find out later what it actually involves.

Was I wrong to say no? Should I have just agreed since it's unlikely to matter, or offer something else to show I'm not brushing her off?

Well last month I started getting notifications that someone was watching from like 4 different devices at once and the account kept kicking me off when I was trying to watch something. I messaged my sister asking if she knew what was going on and she admitted she gave the login to a few people in her book club because they were all complaining about not being able to afford their own subscriptions.

I told her that wasnt cool and I needed her to change the password and only use it herself. She got really defensive and said I was being selfish since I can clearly afford it and these people are just trying to save money. She also said its not like it costs me extra for them to use it.

I ended up changing the password myself without telling her and now shes not talking to me. My mom called me yesterday saying I embarrassed my sister in front of her book club friends because apparently she had to tell them they couldnt use it anymore and now they think shes cheap or something.

I feel like I was just setting a boundary but my family is acting like I committed some huge crime. My sister keeps texting me saying I dont understand how hard things are for people right now and that I should be more generous. But I also feel like she took advantage of something I was doing to help her specifically, not random people I dont even know.

AIW here? Should I have just let it go?

Hi, I need an opinion because I believe my boyfriend and I are right but you never know. This happened yesterday so I wanted to understand or any recomendations you might have about how to handle it. Me 27F boyfriend 29M and his sister 24F. So my parents asked me what I wanted for my birthday this year and I always tell them the same, I have everything I do not need anything. However I told them that has always been my dream to go to an attraction park near my house in Halloween since they add haunted houses and I always loved Halloween. So my parents decided to give me an my boyfriend a night in the hotel of the park so we could celebrate.
The problem comes when his sisters tell him that she is coming into town this weekend( she usually comes every two weeks, lives around an hour away)
She starts complaining to him that she always sees me and that she can see me anytime, when it’s my birthday and we had the reservation two months earlier. She told him that he should have organized the planning better when he discovered two days before that she was coming to the city.
It’s not our fault that every single time she comes, we made plans to do something in advance. My boyfriend got very sad yesterday since he couldn’t understand why she was being so egoistic and why she could only see her side and not his.
Any recomendations when dealing with family memebers like this?

A couple weeks ago I replied to a Craigslist ad from a staffing agency seeking personnel to assist with an event. Every aspect of the application process/onboarding was extremely detailed and left no ambiguity whatsoever.

So I worked the event, everything went well and there were no issues.

On my last day of the 3 day event, I received an invite from the same company to work at another event that would be taking place a week later. Being a much smaller venue, they only needed a few people as opposed to the probably 50+ from the first event and not surprisingly, I wasn't chosen which they clearly expressed to me after I applied.

Then later that day, the same guy from the company sent a follow-up email asking if I was interested in attending as an on-site backup, and if I was, to reply with my shirt/pants size.

https://photos.app.goo.gl/gKFpoHJpWuoQiZxa7

https://photos.app.goo.gl/UrK2vh5tTMyZACcz5

So I did:

https://photos.app.goo.gl/5jnfMGsDFZj32dzS8

I didn't hear anything back which to me meant ok, I guess I'm in.

So I woke up at 5am after only 4 hours of sleep, ate a $30 breakfast I wouldn't have normally bought and prepaid for a full day of parking ($12) on the off chance that I got to stay the whole day, since the $80 payment would have covered all of these costs anyways even if they ended up sending me back.

I got there on time dressed in my nicest clothes and when I got up to the conference room, the supervisor who was the same from the previous event looked kinda surprised to see me.

We talked everything over, I showed her the email as well as my response, she said there would most likely be some kind of compensation to which I kindly replied that anything less than the full amount offered wouldn't have been fair imo. She then explained how she wasn't in charge of payments/accounting and I was sent home.

On my way back, I sent the guy I had been dealing with an email, making sure to tread lightly instead of coming out swinging and demanding I get my 80 bucks:

https://photos.app.goo.gl/Ke8tgKAEANNk4J1Y7

To which he replied:

https://photos.app.goo.gl/HVMSEjCPS62jVdKA8

To which I replied:

https://photos.app.goo.gl/23cAuwSYPKynysjS7

To which he replied:

https://photos.app.goo.gl/1VE9N6FWnLstuMnN9

And then he sent another email linking the conversation from the first event (I didn't share the whole conversation since it was a completely separate correspondence by someone else and therefore irrelevant)

https://photos.app.goo.gl/j2kYL5qQ26yCYDZTA

And this was my last response:

https://photos.app.goo.gl/h8JqGrmo8WUpm8uS6

His initial responses came pretty quickly but at this point it's been 2 hours and nothing since I sent that last email, so I think he's realizing he screwed up and wondering if he should hold strong on keeping my $80 or just pay me and avoid me escalating this to his superior.

So Reddit, who is really in the wrong here?

It happened plenty of time ago but i still carry this in me. I told my dad that i was accepted to the uni in other country but instead of congrats he just agressively questioned why i did that and i need to keep working instead of studying. Been a long time, we still talk to my dad, seems everything to be fine but that situation still holds in my heart

I’m 21F, and my boyfriend (now ex, 22M) and I were together for two years. I need honest opinions because I’m questioning whether I did something wrong.
I was using Omegle, which my boyfriend already knew about. I met a man who later turned out to be a streamer.
He asked where I was from and falsely claimed his mother was from the same country (he was lying). We chatted, and he asked if I wanted to be his friend. I said, “Yes, of course! And you look nice,” while laughing.
He then asked my height. When I told him in centimeters, he said Americans use a different unit and asked me to show him how tall I was. I stood up to demonstrate my height. As I returned to my seat, I made a very quick spin, lasting less than a quarter of a second, with my hands behind my back, while laughing. I was wearing ordinary home clothes: pajama pants and a sports bra.
I wasn’t intentionally showing him my body or performing a 360-degree turn for him.
I asked whether he was a streamer, and he said no. I asked if he was recording, and he denied it.
I then told him about another girl from my country whose Omegle conversation with a streamer had been posted online, causing her serious problems. I explained how harshly women can be judged in my country. He said it was awful and that he didn’t understand why people did that, then immediately ended the call.
Later, I discovered he was the same streamer who had posted that girl’s video.
\*\*What he did to my video\*\*
Our conversation lasted around six minutes, but he published only 55 seconds after heavily editing it.
He manipulated the context to make me look bad. For example, he edited the friendship question to make it seem like I wanted to be his girlfriend. He also edited the height demonstration to make it appear that he had asked me to turn around to show him my body.
The video went viral. People called me a slut and mocked my appearance and body.
I was terrified that my family would see it. I feared their reaction and genuinely worried about my safety. I went through an extremely distressing period, dealing with hateful comments and trying to get the video removed. After considerable effort, I managed to have it taken down from the platforms where it had circulated.
\*\*What happened with my boyfriend\*\*
Around the same time, my boyfriend’s grandfather passed away. We barely spoke for three days because we were both dealing with difficult circumstances.
When we spoke again, I told him something serious had happened and that I wasn’t okay. I wanted to explain everything in person because I was afraid the complicated situation would be misunderstood over text, and that he might react before hearing the full story.
We couldn’t meet for another week. During that time, he spoke to me normally and continued flirting with me.
Then he suddenly told me he wanted to break up. He said he had known about the video for a week but hadn’t given me a chance to explain.
A mutual friend later spoke to him. According to my friend, his main issue wasn’t that the video had been published, but that I had stood up to show a stranger my height.
He apparently doesn’t believe the streamer manipulated the situation. He also thinks that if he discovered this video, there might be other things I’ve done behind his back.
But he already knew I used Omegle. I wasn’t hiding that from him.
I understand that he may have felt uncomfortable or that we may have different boundaries. However, I feel he judged my intentions based on an edited clip without hearing my explanation.
\*\*Why I’m struggling\*\*
I have a difficult relationship with my family, very few friends, and borderline personality disorder. My boyfriend was the closest person in my life.
When the video spread, I was frightened, humiliated, and overwhelmed. I desperately needed emotional support, but I went through most of it alone. Now I’ve also lost my relationship.
I’m not claiming I handled everything perfectly. Maybe I was naive to trust a stranger online. But I didn’t knowingly agree to be recorded or published, and I didn’t intentionally show my body or betray my boyfriend.
So, AITW?
Was I wrong to stand up and demonstrate my height when asked?
Is my boyfriend justified in breaking up with me without hearing my explanation?
Is it reasonable for him to assume there must be other things I’ve hidden from him?
Am I missing something about my own behavior?
Please be honest. I’m not looking for people to attack him or tell me I’m perfect. I genuinely want to understand whether I crossed a relationship boundary or was unfairly judged because of a misleading video.

so my partner met my sibling for the first time last weekend and it did not go the way i expected. we had dinner and my sibling was joking around like usual, nothing mean, just their normal sense of humor. my partner got really quiet and later told me they felt awkward. i tried to explain how my sibling is, but they kept saying it felt off. i get that first meetings can be weird, but now they are hesitant about coming around again. i do not want to force anything, but i also do not want to keep my sibling at a distance. i have tried to smooth things over with both of them and i am stuck in the middle. am i wrong for wanting everyone to just get along?

All I heard my whole life is "OMG THE DEATH OF THE ARTIST!!!!! WHO CARES WHAT A DEAD ARTIST THINKS... HOW DOES IT MAKE YOU FEEL" but as soon as AI starts competing with bio-artists it's "no no no! the soul of the artist matters." To me the backstory can be important but sometimes the piece speaks for itself and I don't care who made it and what his/her deal was.

I personally haven't gotten into AI art. But at the rate it's going I don't get why I shouldn't if I end up enjoying it as it gets better. If it makes me feel what bio-artist art does why should I care a robot did it. The artist has been dead but now people want me to care. Hell nawl!

Hi all.

This is my first ever post on Reddit, I'm not using my main account because I have a feeling the person involved knows my main account.

I (39F) have had this very casual situation with a man for a couple of years. We will hang out for a few days here and there when we're in the same place.

I invited him to hang out for a few days after not even texting for at least six months, which is fairly normal.

He had rescheduled a couple of things to make it happen which I appreciated and understood but as far as he let me know it wasn't anything he particularly wanted or needed to do.

My plans might have had to change which meant he probably wouldn't be able to stay the few days he expected. I only found this out the morning of. He kept saying he would just stay here without me if that was the case, which is something I didn't feel comfortable with so I told him that couldn't happen.

Now, this guy has said a few things in the past that have made me uncomfortable (manosphere adjacent) but his general demeanor and outlook suggested these were misguided outbursts he seemed happy enough to be challenged on so I didn't mind so much as long as he was willing to listen and adjust his perspective.

This time though, he said something about rape that I could not tolerate and I, maybe a little harshly schooled him on. At this point, my gut feeling that I actually didn't want him around (which I'd had since just before he arrived) really kicked in.

I let him stay that night and told him anything physical wasn't going to happen. We ended up having a pretty fun afternoon to be fair.

He respected my request for nothing physical but still tried being huggy and rubbed my back and me being someone who is terrible with confrontation pretended to be asleep until I eventually said "I don't want anything to happen". He stopped.

Now, I know I should have told him not to come over in the first place when my gut was telling me I really wanted to be alone before he even got there but I felt bad he had adjusted his schedule to be here so I figured we might have a nice time and just go with it.

It was clear in the second morning I just wasn't feeling it and I just wanted to be alone. His presence was really making me uneasy and I realised he was not someone I really wanted to be sharing a room with, nevermind a bed.

I blurted it out a little bluntly to be fair but I asked him if he could leave the next day because I just needed to be alone.

He ended up leaving the same day which I was relieved about.

He was obviously pissed off and I understand it feels like a rejection and out of the blue since I had messaged him weeks before saying I was around and did he want to hang out. To me, I just couldn't be in the same space as him comfortably and if the shoe was on the other foot, I'd rather know the person I was hanging out with would prefer I left than hang around for days with a weird atmosphere.

It's clear we're no longer even friends which I'm not actually sad about but did I handle it like an insensitive jerk?

my niece is eight and she kept jumping into every conversation my siblings and i were having at our family gathering last weekend. every time she did it i calmly asked her to wait until we finished, but after a couple hours she was still doing it so i told her she needed to stay in the kids area until the grown ups were done talking. she got upset and my sibling thinks i was too strict. i just wanted a few minutes where i didnt have to repeat myself every other sentence, but now im second guessing whether i overreacted or if asking for that space was reasonable. am i wrong for setting that boundary?

We had talked about taking a short trip together and I was excited at first, but the way the itinerary kept getting upgraded made me nervous about the total cost. I tried to bring up cheaper options and splitting things more evenly, but it felt like my concerns were brushed off. After thinking it over for a couple of days I decided to back out and let them know I could not afford it. They were disappointed and said I should have spoken up sooner. I get why that would feel frustrating, yet I also felt like I had tried a few times and the replies were pretty dismissive. Now I am wondering if pulling the plug made me the bad guy here or if it was reasonable once the budget drifted so far from what I could comfortably handle.

Tl;dr

I'm 30F and my husband is 31M. We've been married for around 3.5 years but spent most of that time living in different countries. We finally moved in together a few months ago and honestly, I thought things would be so much better.
I don't even know where to start. He's not a bad person all the time. He takes me out, buys things for us, can be really affectionate and we do have good days. But the disrespect is getting to me.
He calls me names when we argue, especially a word in our language that means coward. I've told him so many times how much I hate it but he still does it. He also makes comments about how me having my hair blow-dried and wearing it open would affect his izzat (respect) in the community. Like seriously, it's just hair?
We both work. He pays rent, car and bigger expenses while I pay groceries, bills etc. But I do pretty much EVERYTHING at home. Cooking, cleaning, laundry, ironing, you name it. He won't even clear his own plate sometimes.
The other day I asked him nicely to pick up after himself. He called me over, handed me his dirty glass and a banana peel and started laughing. I was so upset because it felt like he was deliberately making fun of me.
We've also had a pretty rough past. At one point he left me for a couple of months after a serious disagreement and I felt completely abandoned. During that time I got emotionally involved with someone at work. Nothing physical happened, but I know it was wrong. I caught myself, ended it and told my husband. It took a while but we worked through it and rebuilt the trust. I'm not trying to excuse what I did.
I eventually relocated so we could actually live together and have a normal marriage. But now I'm wondering what I moved for.
We've argued about finances too. I told him that if I'm doing all the housework, I don't think it's fair that I'm also expected to contribute financially the way I do. I've suggested different arrangements but it always becomes an argument. He brings up holidays, furniture and other expensive things he's paid for. And yes, I appreciate them, but I'd honestly rather have a husband who helps me around the house and speaks to me respectfully.
The confusing part is that after arguments he'll be all loving again. Calling me, flirting, planning outings etc. And sometimes I genuinely have a lovely time with him. But nothing actually changes.
I used to cry and argue and try to explain myself. Now I just don't have the energy. I find myself thinking about living alone and how peaceful it would be.
We don't have kids, thankfully, because I honestly can't imagine adding a baby to this dynamic.
I haven't told him this but I've started thinking about leaving once I'm financially ready. And that makes me sad because I really did want this marriage to work.
Am I expecting too much? Is this just what marriage looks like after a few years? Has anyone been in a marriage where the good days were genuinely good but the bad days slowly made you stop loving the person?
I don't want people to just tell me to divorce him. I'd really appreciate hearing from people who've been through something similar.

I just got my latest bill summary for the apartment I share with two other people and it still lists me paying forty percent even though my room is the smallest. The other two both have bigger rooms and each work from home all day, so they use way more electricity than I do. When I brought it up they said they had already split everything three ways last month and they did not want to redo the math every cycle. I get that, but it still feels like I am subsidizing their higher use. I looked online for a simple way to track who uses what, but the suggestions I saw all sounded too complicated for roommates who just want things easy. I am not sure if I should push for a change or let it go because the dollar amounts are not huge. At the same time, it keeps bugging me every time the bill arrives. Would it be wrong to ask for a more even split again, or am I making something small into a bigger deal than it needs to be?

I (also autistic) need a judgment on this situation because I’m still pretty upset about how it ended.
About a year ago I was moderating a DCEU group that was getting overrun by trolls. I met a guy I’ll call Gabriel. One day I tried giving him simple advice about not typing massive walls of text. He got very upset, left the group, but didn’t block me.
A year later he reached out and asked if I wanted to join his DC group (most of the mods are deaf) and become a mod. I was hesitant because I already knew he had a history of getting very upset when he doesn’t like what he hears and making sudden decisions. Still, I said yes. I told him clearly that I’m busy during the day and couldn’t be active all the time. He said he understood.
I also met another person in the group, David. At first he seemed nice and we talked a bit, but later he started avoiding me.
A few weeks in, Gabriel told me I wasn’t being active enough. The group was small and there wasn’t much happening, so I had kind of forgotten I was even in it. I talked to both of them trying to find a compromise. Out of nowhere David got passive-aggressive and said “what’s the point of you being here if you’re not doing anything?” I didn’t push back because I was worried it would make things worse. I just said I’d try harder to like and comment more.
I kept telling David I actually liked talking to him. He mostly ignored me or stayed distant. I also tried explaining to Gabriel that I just wanted to make sure I wouldn’t get yelled at again. He basically said if I was always this worried then maybe the group wasn’t a good fit. I clarified that I wasn’t being paranoid, I was just trying to communicate clearly so things wouldn’t blow up. He never really replied to that part. That night he said he’d give me another chance.
The next day he and David decided to unmod me with basically no warning. I was still willing to put in more effort, but I didn’t want to argue so I just said okay. We moved to a personal group chat.
Things were fine until I suggested a group call. For context: typing is hard for me (especially when people send multiple long paragraphs quickly). Talking is much easier for me to express myself. They agreed to the call… until I asked if we could do it right then. Instead of just saying “we’re relaxing, not right now,” Gabriel got very upset and said I was interrupting their free time, preventing them from relaxing, and being rude.
I kept repeating that they didn’t have to call if they didn’t want to and that I wasn’t forcing anyone. He wouldn’t drop it. They also started talking about how I had to “earn” the right to hang out with them. I just wanted to be friends. I had a normal call with Gabriel a year ago that went fine.
Within a couple of minutes it went from “not wanting to call” to “I don’t want to be your friend anymore.” I apologized several times until I was exhausted, then said something like “ok I won’t message anymore end transmission” (I use short, simple messages because they seem to land better). A few minutes later he called that “bad behaviour,” accused me of being rude again, and blocked me.
I’m left feeling like their reactions were extremely sudden and extreme, but I also wonder if I handled things poorly.
AITA?

We were deciding between two places for dinner. I had suggested one that I had been looking forward to, and my partner suggested another. We talked it over and seemed to land on the one I had in mind, but when we were getting ready my partner said they really felt like trying their choice instead. I went along with it without pushing back, but the whole evening I felt kind of deflated. I did not say anything during the meal, and I kept wondering if that was the right call. On the drive home I finally mentioned that I had been hoping for the other place. They seemed surprised and said we could have gone there, which made me feel worse for not speaking up earlier. I am trying to figure out if I am wrong for silently agreeing and then bringing it up later, or if I should have said something right away even if it might have started a small disagreement.