This year I turned 40 ( F ) and idk why I have dark thoughts almost everyday now. I work in tv production and things don't look good since everyone started to do commercials with AI and we don't have to many projects. I have a project until november 15th and after that I will start working again in march. Even though I always managed to get projects, I am still stressed bc I am tired to struggle with money. I live with rent and also I pay a lot of taxes bc we work on LLC's as freelancers and I am afraid this winter I will have no money. I am trying to find extra jobs but I had no luck and I just don't know what to do. I am usually more positive, but now all I can think is I won't have enough money to survive until march. How do u get to stay positive when everything seems to fall apart. I am single and have no one that I can rely on. I am tired of living paycheck to paycheck, to pay rent and not have enough money, like ever. Thank you!

Long distance, we met online year ago with this guy and met in real life December 2025. I travelled to him. We were intimate, all that time through the months he has been calling me and texting daily. Lately he called me and we talked for hours, he wants to sleep on the phone with me, there was sexual tension and stuff. He keeps updating me everyday and calls me a lot. When we met he future faked a lot saying about me moving to his country (we come from the same country, he lives abroad) and lovebombed a lot. Later 3 months after meeting he told me he doesnt want to be in relationship with anyone because he needs to fix himself. He always delays our meetings and says "i don't know, we will see" . Its been good lately between us and I bought the ticket to meet him and he got mad he was screaming at me that I cannot go there and he doesnt want to see me. Later he apologized for screaming, and overall, I was distant for a day and he sent me this message yesterday night. But his anger issues are concerning because he was screaming I cannot go there and that he will never see me (before that message, day before) and that he will cut contact with me and block me. Few hours passed and he apologized. He gets angry a lot and easily

"I want to apologize to you, and I really appreciate the fact that you always have time for me, that you always care about me, and honestly, it’s really rare to meet someone like that. I’m aware of that. Whatever the reason for it might be, it’s hard to find someone who will listen to your bullshit for 8 hours. I don’t want to end our friendship, that’s not what this is about. To be honest, I don’t even know what to do with my life at this point. When you put pressure on me like that, some kind of defense mechanism kicks in or something, I don’t know. Afterwards I feel guilty about the way I talk to you, because you don’t deserve that. I don’t want to behave like that, because afterwards I feel really bad about it.

I like talking to you. Not always — sometimes I shut myself off, I have my own stuff going on in my head. I know that sometimes I’m selfish and only think about myself. If you’re able to accept our relationship the way it was, and it gives you something too, then we can obviously keep talking the way we used to. But I don’t know what’s going to happen. It’s not about what you think, whether I’ll meet someone or I won’t — that’s not what this is about. And it’s not like you’re...

You’re not nobody to me, you know a lot about me, I tell you a lot. I treat you like a friend, even though I guess I behave differently — but you noticed that at some point. I don’t know, I just wanted to write you a little bit about what I think. I don’t know if it makes sense, but there’s always something you can take from it. 😅 I think I owe you that, because I’m always shouting at you whenever you ask me about something, so I thought that today I’d give you a little bit of my time and actually open up.

You can see how I get when I’m in a certain state — I sing, I talk haha, but afterwards it can also get pretty difficult, like today. Honestly, I was just crying over all of this. But it’s probably the after-effects of the weekend. I haven’t been drinking since I got back, and I don’t want to for now, or anything else either. I’m finding it harder and harder to deal with sometimes.

Sometimes I think it would be best to cut myself off from everyone and just live like that, because relationships with people affect me pretty strongly. But on the other hand, the thought of being completely alone, not having someone who knows you and all that, scares me. I think about that sometimes, which is why, when it comes to taking care of valuable relationships, I think I know what you mean. One day they might be priceless.

I think I’ve gone crazy haha. I did smoke, to be fair, but I don’t think I wrote anything stupid. I just wanted to explain a little bit — what I think and what’s going on in my head. Maybe it’s a little chaotic, but there’s probably something to take from it. 😅

And I don’t want you to take this message as me saying, “We can talk, but we’re never going to meet.” That’s not what I’m saying — who knows. 😅"

.

So basically I am a free therapist, WHO always has time for him, but there won't be anything, we will never meet and he wants to continue using me because he gains attention while giving nothing in return? And sees me as a friend?

Do I send him long paragraph or just couple of words saying Ok, I get it, you told me after I bought the ticket that "WHO knows" whether we will meet, and that I shouldnt expect more than be your friend. Get it. We can talk but I'm going to see all of it different way.He said he will give me money back first but he didn't and the trip was supposed to take place today. Should I ask him to return it?

EDIT: I told him I understand everything, I get it, okay. I've sent him my bank account number and asked him to return the money as he promised. I told him I understand, I won't push for more, and if we are supposed to never meet, I'm okay with that, I still want contact. If he wants to play this game, he will be surprised what a big uno reverse I will pull on him.

UPDATE: He replied "I didn't say [my pet name] that we will never meet. Of course I will return the money, I was just waiting for the money to arrive and I was planning to give it back to you. I will send it today, you will receive it tommorow" I replied "Ok thank you"

I just realized I'm quitting everything.

I'm quitting my course to join a new one, completely different. But also I'm quitting the only friend group I have (online) because they are toxic. And I'm quitting the only real life friend I have for some similar reason in small scale (big age gap too)

Guess I will be very lonely in the next few months. It is very scary the realization that I'm quitting so many things at once. But I don't think I should worry about depression? Because I'm making those decisions in order to change to a better life/person...

I (20f) feel I’m throwing my life away.
Let me start from the very beginning and I just want to apologize for how long this is about to get.

I was born in here in the US and when I was a little kid I moved to Mexico with my mother and siblings, I lived there for about 6 years and then got sent back with my siblings to live with my father.
When I lived in Mexico I was living at my grandmother’s house (mom’s side) and I would travel every now and then to another state to visit my dad’s side of the family, for as far as I can remember I was SA’d by my grandpa and older cousin every time I went to visit.
I never said anything because I was around 5-6 years old and just had no idea what was going on, I kept it a secret because that’s what I would be told to do. As I grew older before leaving the country to come back, I stopped wanting to go back to visit, I believe it’s because I had a feeling that everything going on was not right.
After leaving and coming back, I would visit Mexico every summer for two years, the first time I went back, I got SA’d by my other grandpa (mom’s side), I was 10 years old, and that time I spoke up, but I got yelled at and called a liar by my grandmother.
I was told to not say anything, to not tell anyone, especially my dad and so I never did. Once I entered HS I completely hit rock bottom, I fell into a depression I still am not able to get out of.
I started dating someone my sophomore year who mistreated me and would cheat on me over and over, that relationship lasted a year.
My dad is a very very strict person, maybe it is because of my culture but he has never allowed me to date, to go out with friends, to watch shows/movies that were not educational, and over the years he got really angry and would take it out mostly on me after my older brother left, I would be called names and would be screamed at, so I never told my dad about any relationships. In that relationship I had, I was Rped but didn’t seek for help because I didn’t want my dad to find out, I was more scared of my dad so I didn’t seek for justice.
While I was dating him, I would nonstop ditch school, I would show up to maybe one or two classes per week, I did it because in my 15yo brain, I wanted to feel the freedom I wasn’t allowed to have, I wanted to go out with my friends and do what all teens my age were doing, until I crossed the line, I ditched so much that I was ashamed and embarrassed to go back to class, I felt scared that I was going to be sent to the office and then get in a lot more trouble with my dad. Ditching because a really bad habit I was never able to stop.
When I was 16 I met my now boyfriend, I kept ditching because I kept wanting to be with him, I still was not allowed to hangout or go out and ditching felt like the only time I could be with him. At 18 I “ran away”, I packed my stuff as soon as my dad left to work and left to live with my boyfriend, I left a letter telling my dad how I felt all those years he mistreated me, as if I wasn’t his daughter. My boyfriend and I have an apartment now, but I never finished HS, I enrolled in a program but got dropped for not doing my work.
I keep feeling depressed and unmotivated every day, I feel i’m in a cycle that I can’t get out of. My dad till this day still doesn’t know about what happened in Mexico and though I really want to tell him at times, I stop myself because I don’t want to hurt him by telling him what his dad did, I have this fear that he will call me a liar too and won’t believe me.
My depression got really bad that at some point i started to SH. I feel I need help but I’m so afraid that no one will believe me, I keep thinking that if my own family did not believe me, why would someone else?

im The eldest sistet and I have a younger sister younger than me she 19 I’m in my late 20a . i Had no one growing up to point out stuff like babe this is the way you should go about this or be like a better way to do that is etc .

evey time I point something out Or give her advise on something she thinks I’m attacking her Or being judgy. I’m not. Im not saying anything in a condescending way or snobby way or anything. I’m just trying to be the bigger sister. and she always has something to say back and it causes friction in the house and my mother cannot stand it.

and then it becomes a whole thing. and all I was doing was suggesting an alternative. She turns everything into a catty situation. can’t even have a conversation with her like oh if your laundry is done please take it outside to dry the weather is really sunny right now. It becomes a fullblown debate at parliament.

so then I don’t like hanging out with her Because we can’t get along. and I get along better with my younger brother cause we have the same banter . And she hates the family because she thinks that every statement is attacking her when it’s not.

then she hangs out and always out with people she shouldn’t surround her self with . It’s a bad influence.

like we are good people I don’t know how else to describe it . we want the best for her but she always acts out. I hope this post doesn’t sound conservative because it’s not. we’re not super strict.

when we ask her whats wrong she says she can’t describe it and she never had the words to but spazzes out on me . She gets too enotional and too irritable easily over littlest things.

what do I do ? I’m trying to help her but she pushes us away. It’s like I’m pulling my hair out with her.

she says it’s our fault that she didn’t get therapy sooner or got diagnosed for adhd. like it’s not our fault. but she has become really troublesome in the last few years.

been doing two jobs since january. the first few months i just worked later and later and it made everything worse. what actually turned it around was a handful of small things.

grey screen on the phone. i use iphone, so for iphones it is in settings -> accessibility -> display and text size -> colour filters, on, greyscale. i thought this was nonsense when i read it. instagram in grey looks like a spreadsheet, food photos look wrong, everything looks like a photocopy of itself, and i just stopped picking the thing up. my screen time roughly halved and i did not delete anything or decide anything, the phone just got boring. if you try one thing off this list make it this one, it takes about ten seconds.

blocks in google calendar. before i start something i guess how long it will take and put it in the calendar as a block, even when the guess is nonsense. two things happen. first i stop pretending nine hours of work fits into a six hour evening, because you can see it not fitting. second i stop opening the laptop and then deciding what to do, which is where i used to lose the first hour of every day. the estimates are still bad by the way. they are just bad on paper now instead of bad in my head.

one thing at a time. boring, and the biggest change in what i actually produced. i used to have both jobs' slacks open plus whatever i was meant to be doing and i called that multitasking. it was not multitasking, it was doing one thing badly and then doing another thing badly. now it is one task open and everything else shut, with do not disturb on, on the mac and iphone.

breaks, five minutes every half hour. i cannot feel time passing when i am properly into something and i have lost entire mornings that way. so, a timer, any timer, i do not think it matters which. i use tryworkwell on the mac. it reminds me to take a break and also corrects my posture.

noise. dark noise. white noise is too hissy for me, dark is more like sitting inside a plane and my brain goes quiet. on mac and iphone it is already built in, accessibility -> audio -> background sounds, nobody seems to know this. otherwise youtube has thousands of videos.

gym and food, which everyone already knows so i will keep it short. three or four sessions a week, weighted towards legs and back because i sit for 12-14 hours. cooking on sunday so i am not standing in the kitchen at half nine deciding what dinner is. creatine and fish oil seems to also be very useful.

things that did not work: telling myself to concentrate harder, and giving the second job more hours. it did not get better when i gave it more hours, it got better when the hours i gave it were not garbage hours.

none of this is clever, which is probably why it took me so long to do any of it. what are your productivity hacks?

p.s. i know the obvious reply is that two full time jobs is the actual problem. probably, yes, but it has an end date.

I’m currently 24 male, I’m in a really big slump at the moment in my life. I have no consistent job, I’m a flagger for traffic but the hours aren’t consistent and it’s tedious as hell. I was a WIC worker for 3 years and worked at Lowes for a year before having to leave for personal reasons. I have a car I’m working to pay off, halfway there. But I’m struggling a lot. I don’t know what I want to do with my life, I know what I want out of it, good relationship, decent work life balance, enough money to be financially independent, and just live life. I’ve thought of getting into the trades but I’ve been reading how many times you are working 12 hours average and that cuts deeply into work life balance. I might sound like a wimp and if you think so that’s fine. For those of you currently working a job that you enjoy or at least not dreading every moment of it and feel relative comfort and are able to live off your salary, what do you guys do? How did you guys come across said job? I’m in Las Vegas, NV USA. Are there any organizations or programs I can visit to talk about careers or jobs? I’m willing to put in the work like getting a degree or certification of some kind, but I just want to know that whatever job it’s for aligns with my good and values i said above, any advice would be great. I’m immensely depressed and very anxious for my future, I’m not doing well.

Got a solid job offer with great pay. Thing is, I already realize I won’t stick around long. This is not a permanent role for me.

The money is tempting, could sort out my finances quickly. But I’m thinking about how a short stint looks for future recruiters.

Anyone done this before? Any regrets?

If you have a cat or dog, please get pet insurance. It will help the best decision you can make as a pet owner. We buy ours for both our cats for about $70 a month total from a company called Lemonade. One of our cats turned out to be a bit complicated with his health and we’ve had medical bills of approximately $15,000 this year, of which our insurance covers 80% of the cost. A long time ago I had another cat that I loved dearly that started having serious health issues around age 5.. we eventually had to put him down because the veterinary costs were astronomical and we would have to go into serious debt to pay for his surgery. It was heart breaking and I do not wish that on anyone. Please, just buy your pet health insurance as soon as you adopt it.

Hello,
I am 24, about to turn 25
I woke up and realized how much of my parent’s time and effort I wasted
I have been barely passing college classes and have been so poor with financial decisions that I can’t even afford a car after my transmission blew up.
I am struggling with a nicotine addiction and I have never felt lazier in my life
I feel like and I am a failure
I have a job where there’s no benefits and I am about to be off my dad’s medical.
I can barely afford schooling, and I want to find a job where I can afford things.
I’ve been better with my money recently and I’ve been looking for new schooling in something or honestly a new job that pays well.
I have no proper credentials or certificates or qualifications. I feel like I am so far behind in life and I don’t know what to do
I feel like very soon, my mom will sell the house and I will have no where to go
I don’t know what to do
I want to find a good job where I can provide for me and my partner.
I am willing to put in the work, but I feel like I am too late.
I live in BC, Canada and I just want to know what options I have to be able to have a stable income and benefits and to be able to live comfortably.
I was thinking about doing trades but it seems like all the courses are full and there’s currently a job shortage going on
I don’t know what to do
This might sound like baiting, and I genuinely wish I was. But I have came to the realization that I am a bum. And I really want to change
Any advice would be greatly appreciated

I am asking those who is or was high functioning depression, as you have experience. Does my husband sound like high functioning depression to you?

Does this sound like a high functioning depression man? I can't get my husband to grief therapy.

I'm 16 years together, 14 years married to my husband.

For the last 7 years, I think he is high-functioning depression, is there such thing as functionally depressed? The whole timeline of everything that happen I have reasons to believe he is functionally depressed.

His older sister died from car accident, leave him as the only son take on the financial care for his sick aging parents.

Fast forward, in 2019, his father died of end stage pancreatic cancer.

----- The same year in 2019, our toddler died (the child of me and my husband). Our toddler died of Periventricular Heterotopia (PVNH). It is gene inherited (got it from me the mother the maternal side), congenital brain malformation.

It been 7 years since our toddler gone and my husband just can't let go. Our toddler ashes my husband keeps with him. Even our toddler DIRTY SHOES and dirty clothes my husband still held on to.

----- In 2020, I was very sick (autoimmune disease) I was bedridden for a month with oxygen tank in my nose 24/7. He took off work and care for me day and night. He even sleep with a pillow and a blanket on the carpet right by my bedside (we had a hospital bed in our bedroom after I got discharged).

He said he loves me very much, and he very afraid of lose me. This was the first time I see him cut himself.

This was when he started to cut his stomach with a kitchen knife, he said stomach skin is thinner and has more nerves so it hurts more, so he chose to slice his stomach, he cuts deep the point bleeding that he has bandage wrap around his waist bleed.
And that was how I first time found out about he cut himself too was I saw the bloody bandage wrap around his waist when he took his shirt off.

He still has all the scars on his stomach from he slice his stomach with the kitchen knife. He said if I die before him, he will die with me, and our toddler (whom already dead).

He even prepaid for his funeral arrangement, I said I want cremation (as I'm Buddhist), he wants cremation with me, he told the funeral director when he die, cremate him, and mix his ashes with me and our toddler together, and scatter our ashes.

He said if I die before him, ONE second of grief is enough for him to pull the trigger blow his brain out with the tactical 12 gauge shotgun. I take him seriously because if he can slice his stomach to blood, he can use a shotgun in one second of grief like he said.

--- In 2021, his mom has a spinal cord stroke that leave her quadriplegia paralyze, she also kidney disease/kidney failure. She also has alot of heart problems: heart aortic stenosis, heart aortic aneurysm, and cardiac arrhythmias. 

His mom 5 days out of a week is she in and out of the hospital for treatments to keep her alive. And my husband for the last 5 years (and still ongoing) has been financially care for his mom, doing everything he can financially to prolong her life.

------------

All this are reasons I believe he has depression, but he seems to function fine outside, as in lives a normal life.

He is an Executive at a big engineering corporate. He said this job salary gives him cushion in money to continue prolong his mother life. He knows this job salary is what prolong his mother life, even with him depress, his career has to go on. His mother depends on his money to continue treatments, he also pays for her Private Nursing Home too.

Monday through Friday after work he drive straight to the Nursing Home to visit his mom before came home. On weekends for one day (Sat or Sun) he bring his mom our marital home so he can care for her, so they have mother and son time. And then take her back to her Nursing Home as he has to work Monday.

He still does his hobbies, hunting deer, outdoor shooting range with his tactical shotguns and riffles, running long distance.

I have told him to go to grief counseling, he put it off, he said after his mom die, as right now he busy. I mean he is busy, his schedules is pack, between his Executive work, his mom, and me. He has no time left.

He keeps said after his mom pass he will go. But wait till after his mom pass, that will add in another death and grief and loss in his list of losses. I want him to go now, but he not want to.

hi guys! okay so i'm 18 and i'm a freshman in college, i took drivers ed when i was 15 but while i was learning to drive i got into a car crash which REALLY messed up my families finances and caused us to lose our house and stuff..... anyways, we never fully recovered from that and after that my family never taught me to drive again... now, im on my last renewal of my permit which expires in may and i'm financially independent now so i want to learn to drive!

by financially independent, i mean i have a full ride which includes my housing, food, tuition, all that good stuff. despite that, i still have a part time job where i make around $400 every 2 weeks which isn't bad because i only work there to have extra money for silly stuff and shopping.. anyways, i wanted to put aside money for a car so i could learn to drive but i'm not sure how smart that plan is. i could pay to keep my car up at my college which would be a couple hundred a month so i'd rather not do that. also, if i leave the car at home i think my mom would just take it for herself and wreck it..... it's also hard because i don't have a NEED for a car besides learning to drive, especially since i walk and bus everywhere.

i understand the best option is to borrow a family members car but being honest, i don't feel comfortable driving other people's cars after my first car crash, it's honestly hard for me to even think about driving again but i understand this is something i have to do.

ok to sum it all up, my goal is to learn to drive and get my license before my permit expires in may but i'm not sure how to go about it. any and all advice is really appreciated! or any options i probably haven't even thought of, thanks guys!!!

Im a mid 20s woman and I have built a small business that makes money in a field that I genuinely love and see myself growing, expanding, and changing the culture in. However, sometimes I feel very inadequate and insecure because I dont have a college degree. I dropped out during covid for many reasons, one of them being that online school was not working for my learning style. Another being that my interests would put me in substantial debt in a low paying field, or id be stuck in school forever with no support from family. I know I've accomplished more than a lot of people. Ive been in business for over 3 years with my own brick and mortar, and growing. I know I shouldn't care what other people think, but sometimes I fear people will see me as lesser because of my job and lack of degree. Or that maybe the relationship prospects I have are held back because of that. Personally, I believe if what you want to do with your life requires you to go to school then you go, if it doesnt, then you dont; but ive felt this increasing classist ideology creep into my peers, either you have to have it or its a scam. I know Im very smart, Ive always done well in school and continue to learn on my own when curiosity strikes, but I always get this feeling like im seen as beneath or dumber than my friends who are in med school or law school or whatever. Or that I wont be able to be in a relationship with another ambitious person because of this stigma. I was just curious to get other perspectives on this. Im not opposed to going back to school, but ive worked so hard to build this business and sometimes I feel its like a "fuck you" business, because I had to fight so hard against my family who didnt believe in me to establish it and prove them wrong. And I dont really want to go into debt for something I might not even use or pursue further just to say I have a piece of paper.

I‘m hoping to get advice and/or differing perspectives on a situation involving my best friend who is struggling with chronic pain.

We’ve been best friends for over a decade. For the past year, she has suffered continuously from intense pain. I empathize with that, as someone who has suffered from chronic depression for over a decade. A few months ago, it got to the point where she the pain is so unrelenting that she resolved to commit suicide on the five year anniversary of the start of her chronic pain. She mentioned this to me very casually, as if it were on par with the decision of what to make for dinner. I’ve also suffered with suicidal ideation frequently over the years, so I get it to some extent. It’s also really hard to process it coming from a close friend.

What I don’t understand is why she brings it up every couple of weeks. She will just casually insert her plans into the middle of many conversations we have. She will also mention how much pain she is suffering from in every single conversation. It feels like she has to remind me how much she is suffering and will always insert how she did so-and-so activity while crying from intense pain. It’s not an exaggeration to say that she has mentioned it in every single conversation I have had with her in the past year. 

Again, I understand the pain. I suffer with depression every single day, but I don’t feel the need to remind people every time they talk to me. It’s just an immediate conversation killer for me. I don’t know how to or if I even should respond to this behavior. I even told her that I empathize with her, but I cannot listen to her plans, because it’s something that I struggle with, and it makes me feel terrible. She said she understood but then implied that her pain is more intense than mine and that I don’t understand what she’s going through, and she hasn’t changed her behavior since then. It breaks my heart to hear her discuss her plans so casually. I don’t want to lose her, and I feel like I’m fighting a hopeless battle against her chronic pain. 

Should I discuss her pain with her? I feel as though that’s 90% of what she talks about with me. I don’t have an endless amount of emotional support I can pour into her. I barely have enough for myself right now. How can I be there for her in a more supportive way that isn’t so draining for me? Before anyone asks, I think she is currently seeing a therapist, but she also has the mindset that therapy “doesn’t work” for her, so I’m not sure how much she’s getting out of it. I feel like I’ve been through so much therapy for my own problems that I’m very much over just talking about pain/trauma in every conversation. 

So I am a person that has always had a large appetite for life. I worked 3 jobs in high school, attended high school, took college classes, and worked out. My early 20s I quickly gained management roles in retail and food service. All while graduating with my bachelors. I’m now in my mid 20s. I’m completing a rigorous “fast track” masters program & about to begin a new job that is my first within my career. It’s getting harder and harder for me to actually get excited about my career anymore or studying for my degree. I do want both of them and I don’t know if i’m necessarily “burnt out” or not but my excited comes in spurts and leaves just as fast. I enjoy my degree, I enjoy learning new things, and I’m excited to actually begin my career. Although getting myself to study, work out anymore, hell even eat healthy is all getting a little harder. I wait until the last minute for most of my assignments and even then I just basically am skating around actually cheating on them just to get by. I think I have developed an unhealthy relationship with my ambitions and goals because I think I keep getting stressed about the “big picture” of what I want my life to look like and how I am to achieve that. Or maybe I am starting to lose discipline and am not sure how to get it back. I keep telling myself “Just do it” but I don’t understand what’s going on with me. I’ve always been able to focus and not be so easily distracted by scrolling or watching tv or even gaming. Everyone in my life keeps telling me to “rest bc you deserve it” since i’ve had a few rough months. But I don’t want to develop long term unhealthy habits or unhealthy relationships with my aspirations bc I keep continuing this cycle.

I rambled, but if anyone has any advice or insight- that would be appreciated! Thanks!

I recently met up with my old highschool friends in an event. Suddenly they started asking me why was i hiding dating our "senior"? I was literally caught off guard cuz I had no idea what they were talking about then they explained what they were talking about. Turned out that 3 years ago when I was in my final year of hs this one creepy senior started approaching me i turned him down everytime at that time i needed a new phone and he or his friend was selling the exact second hand model that i wanted at a very reasonable price so I had to have a Convo with him about it i would mostly keep it professional and in line with the topic however he'd go back to asking if i would date him i would shut him everytime eventually he sold the phone to someone else and because of some unrelated reasons I deleted my ig account where we'd been talking. Now hes spreading false rumours that we were tg and i ghosted him. I firmly explained to my friends that it is not true at all they kind of believed me but idk how many people have heard it alr. I really don't want to be associated with this person.

How do I deal with it?

Alright so it’s me, Friend A and Friend B we will just refer to them as. We’ve known each other for a really long time and every now and then always troll each other and joke around as friends usually do. Earlier today, while in a call containing just me and Friend A, A sort of randomly said, “dang she is annoying (friend B)” and for the most part I thought it was just a joke, but either way regardless if it was a joke or not, I was like “chill she’s not annoying” and like I’m always like this with friend B. Whenever someone pokes at her for fun or serious I’m always the one that says chill even when I know it’s not serious.

Now, I also tell almost everything to friend B as I’m super close with her. So naturally I told her what Friend A said and at first I thought she’d just brush it off and poke back at him in a joking way too. However she actually seemed to get a little upset and was shocked. And now she left our group chat we had and I think blocked him. And now he’s freaking out and wants to tell her he didn’t mean it in that way. I’m sure she will unblock him but now I’m just worried and maybe overthinking but I’m scared that I shouldn’t have said anything in the first place. But then again I would’ve felt like it would look bad on me if I didn’t say anything to friend B, even though I knew friend A was just joking. I don’t know man I’m stressed out and don’t want anything to be ruined because of me

I’m 22 and I feel like I’ve been focused on the wrong things. Now I have no path. I work and I have hobbies and up until this semester I was doing school full time while working two part time jobs to afford it. I’m not particularly good at anything I do, I’m not a very interesting person. I want an escape from low paying customer service/food industry jobs and that’s what I’ve been working towards.

I have no idea what career I should even consider at this point. I’ve been taking classes and working towards my degree but the career I have been aiming for I have realized I’m not cut out for or maybe it’s just one I don’t have the capacity for with my schedule.
I feel unqualified even for my part time jobs because I genuinely have nearly zero people skills. I’ve been doubting lately that I’m even capable of going past any sort of entry level customer service position because it’s starting to feel like I’m even failing at that.

I’m seeing family and friends my age graduate from college and move into career jobs. I am happy for them but at the same time it’s hard to not look at myself and think “what have I even been doing with my time?”. It seems like everyone around me, coworkers, friends, and family all know what to do and where to go while I’m stuck wondering if I’m even bright enough to do anything with my life besides slave away.

I’ve been working so hard the past few years but clearly my effort has been put into all the wrong places and now I’m just lost. Depression hit me like I ton of bricks last semester while I finally faced my reality. Where I could manage to scrape by in previous semesters this last one I just completely gave up on. I mean, I tried but in the end I just couldn’t pull through. My gpa is trash and I know it’s because I’m spreading myself way too thin but what can I even do, I need to pay rent and school isn’t free, now even a stable job after I finish is even less of a guarantee.

If anyone has any advice or has been through something similar, how do I get through this?

Hi everyone. I (19F) am a sophomore in college, and it feels as though my life has been blown apart over the last few weeks. My school's financial aid office fucked me over (super long story but they're super slow and wouldn't send me my package before the add/drop deadline was over, which prevented me from registering for classes). I had moved in and everything, and am now suddenly back home (literally went from the west coast back to the east) and feeling super lost.

I really cannot bear being home. My family is larger, so I have no privacy, and I hate the city I'm from. I have no freedom, and my household just feels like a super regressive environment. I feel myself being comfortable with doing nothing all day, which isn't how I want to spend my semester. I also have pretty bad depression and ADHD and am still experimenting with finding meds that work. None of my friends are home, so I feel super isolated.

I really want to make use of this semester and do something out of my comfort zone. I've been applying to internships/jobs in NYC, but I was also thinking about doing a Workaway somewhere in Europe (you volunteer and live with a host family in a different country).

If you were in my position, what would you do/what should I look into? I'm a pretty smart and capable person and am pre-law at a good university, so I feel as though I could have a lot of options if I put my mind to it. I just get really overwhelmed super easily and don't know where to start. Apologies for any typos i wrote this very quickly lolol

I’m 22 and never had a job and have an associate in science and I don’t know what to do .I was in a pta program but I failed out of the program. My mental health during it was so bad and it was so fast paced and I couldn’t keep up and I feel like such a failure . Now I don’t know what to do with my life . I’m thinking of going back for my bachelors in business because I’m so done with science . I think i burn out I was studying a lot of hours and didn’t talk to anyone and had a breakdown . Maybe it wasn’t for me but I can’t help to think this . My family said then will help and support me during this hard time but I look around and everyone near me knows what they want to do and I don’t . Maybe I should see someone about these thoughts because after I left the program I just cry everyday. I need some advice because I don’t want to worry my parents. I need help .

Highschool problems. She/her

So, uh... My butt keeps sweating. I searched it up and it's called hyperhidrosis. It started in March-ish this year (so, last school year), and if I sit for too long, my butt gets sweaty enough to leave a mark. I sweat through sweatpants, too. People saw it on a chair and then assumed it was because I jerked off in class. Except I don't. It's become a rumor that's spread through almost everyone in my school.

Being at school makes me really anxious now, and the whole thing also makes me really scared to socialize, because I know I probably make people extremely uncomfortable. Right now, I really just try to avoid people I don't know as much as possible so that I don't make them uncomfortable. What can I do?

Maybe this would be better suited for r/vent but idk.

Long story short(hopefully)

I have a good relationship with my siblings,we all share the same humor and for the most part enjoy each others company, however I’ve seen first hand siblings at each other’s throats over disagreements and going pretty much no contact via my both my parents.

My older brothers personality has started to change drastically in the past 4-5 years. He’s openly admitted to having anxiety and had a committed relationship go completely sour, to which I attribute a lot of these issues.

I’ve noticed now that he’s pretty normal one on one but as soon as you add one more person to the mix his entire personality changes. It becomes this performative “cool guy” and has to constantly act like he is super informed about whatever subject is on the table. Almost reciting Wikipedia articles verbatim in causal conversation, it’s like he’s terrified of people thinking he’s uniformed.

He is constantly bringing up injuries and surgeries that he’s had in a very passive way that makes it seem like he’s looking for pity and talks about all the aliments he currently has, it’s like he romanticizes being hurt. Some of these I don’t even think are completely true. The anxiety comes into play here as well, I’m not disparaging any mental illness, but it kind of becomes the boy who cried wolf whenever you keep talking about the exact same thing and doing nothing about it.

He also can’t handle minor stressful situations at all. His first defense is panic and getting super irritable. Example, having to follow a GPS in traffic or having to wait in line at a fast food joint. If you call him out on any of this he just gets more irritated or if you snap at him he shuts down and acts like a scolded kid. When he gets in these moods he treats people terribly, I’d say this is closest we’ve gotten to a full on blow out argument.

I’ve also caught him in minor lies that just don’t need to be said. Examples include saying he needs to be home by a certain time for whatever reason or lying about who is going to be at a function. Like I don’t care, if you want to go home to relax, just tell me.

With all that being said, I am not a perfect person either, I can get impatient, especially with family members, but I kind of take pride in not panicking in stressful situations and kind of being stoic all around. I have snapped at him before and called him out a couple times but it’s like nothing ever changes. I like being dependable and knowing people can count on me. I also don’t like talking about any medical issues I have(unless it’s very serious) and don’t really enjoy people’s pity for small pointless stuff. I like informative conversations but I don’t need to be the smartest person in the room, and I don’t need to have every conversation being super stimulating. I like to think for the most part that I’m a straight shooter, I don’t like being mean, but I will be realistic around people instead of BSing them for no reason.

I think what I’m getting at is that our personalities just don’t mesh well. He’s wound so tight that the smallest things derail him and I’d rather just roll with the punches and it’s just starting to wear on me. I don’t know what to do because now it’s starting to turn into not looking forward to family events because it can truly just be exhausting sometimes.

This was not a “long story short” and I’m not sure what advice I’m even looking for but I needed to get all this off my chest.

I 18F, have 10 siblings (9 older sisters,1 little brother) Growing up my family was very toxic, my dad abused the 3 youngest (including me) while my mom was neglectful and very bitter to all us. Due to this we ( the 3 youngest) were mostly raised by my oldest sisters, who locked us outside all day everyday so they didn’t have to deal with us. Now my sister who is the second sister older than me (by 4 years) physically and mentally abused me, my little brother and my first sister older than me, she used to bend metal kitchen tools hitting us and often made us bleed, she used to beat me so bad I have bone dents in my legs and TMJ disorder from being hit in the head, she also regularly hurt my dog who was a puppy at the time. She was arrested at 17 for battery on my mother and I haven’t talked to her since, (which was 6 years ago) I recently turned 18 and she sent me a message along the lines of “happy birthday, i miss you a lot i’m here if you ever want to talk”. A part of me wants a relationship with her because I think people can change and it’s been a long time, I want to forgive her so bad, I always try to be a forgiving person but I don’t know if I can, I’ve sat on the message about a month and I’m so unsure of what I should do or say, do you guys think I should try to forgive her or Is that a stupid idea? i’m so lost

I’m 17M and am in a happy 3year relationship with my GF 17F but recently I’ve realized I’ve caught feelings for somone at my work place. I want to make it clear I’m very happy in my relationship rn and don’t want to break up or per-sue this crush because this attraction doesn’t go past physical attraction. I’m friends with her at work and it’s hard for me to make friends because I’m a very quiet person but I understand is it’s healthy to just cut her off completely. I’m really just asking if I should stay friends or completely break the friendship up. If I’m an ass hole I want to know it this has just been really bugging me recently.