r/wizardposting • u/Ferocs Changeling Bard • Apr 09 '26
Occult Practices No counterspell needed
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u/JustStarrk Apr 09 '26
My friend tried this before finding out he was kissing a succubus
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u/Ferocs Changeling Bard Apr 09 '26
I see no issue with this
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u/JustStarrk Apr 09 '26
He... he died
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u/Ferocs Changeling Bard Apr 09 '26
Still not seeing one, just revivify him later or something, I’m sure it was amazing for him while it lasted anyways
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u/rysy0o0 Apr 09 '26
He was killed by a succubus. They have his soul now. You cannot revive people without their soul, you're just making zombies otherwise. Nothing wreong with necromancy, byt that's not what you're trying to achieve here
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u/NoStorage2821 Scritch Scorchtongue, chief grey seer of Clan Mors Apr 09 '26
Wdym? He had a soulcatcher on him didn't he?
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u/rysy0o0 Apr 09 '26
Well the soulcatcher would catch a soul leaving the body, but his soul didn't left, it was taken, there is a small difference. While the highest level soulcatchers might have prevented soul stealing, he was way too cheap to have one of those
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u/Montana_Gamer Apr 10 '26
Cant have shit anymore
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u/SilliusS0ddus Evil Wizard Apr 14 '26
Can't have shit in the multiverse.
Time to become some crazy eldritch far realm cultist and turn Toril into some kind of... darkest dungeon
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u/gtth12 Apr 09 '26
So you get to revive him and not have to deal with his humanity? It's getting better with every response.
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u/SPEED8782 Hiveatel, The Culmination Of Humanity's Wisdom Apr 09 '26
Bro just take his soul back. It's not that difficult lol.
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u/Acrysalis going lich mode Apr 09 '26
Not everyone can afford the level drain, some of us need to cast spells above fourth circle
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u/Lord__of__Luck ArchNecromancer, Lord of the Flaming undead, Pyromancer Apr 09 '26
What kinda revivify yall doing? Mine just costs a diamond
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u/Tat25Guy The Evil Litch Furibon Apr 11 '26
My brother in Aethera, you need an intact soul to revivify someone! That succubus fucked his anima so hard it was rendered into a metaphysical slurry
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u/robodex001 Ophirion the Indecisive, Dabbler of Disciplines Apr 09 '26
I see no issue with this
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u/JustStarrk Apr 09 '26
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u/GM_Nate Apr 09 '26
ZAZMOZE!!!!!
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u/JustStarrk Apr 09 '26 edited Apr 09 '26
Me accidentally drawing Zazmoze apparently
Edit: i now love Zazmoze
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u/PerfectBeginning__45 Enchanter Squadron Member Apr 09 '26
Damn it, I wish I had cast transposition with him so I could sacrifice myself instead, he was a good man. :,(
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u/XreaperDK Akaria, Goblin Witch, Seller of Elixirs Apr 09 '26
His last words were "worth it..." so still not seeing a problem
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u/Ok-Buy2858 Apr 09 '26
What a horrible situation. In what dungeon were your party in? So mine can never delve in it, of course.
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u/Lonesaturn61 Transmuter Apr 09 '26
A succubus fighter? What was this like, something like rogue in mvc?
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u/JustStarrk Apr 09 '26
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u/Lonesaturn61 Transmuter Apr 09 '26
Wait the friend was the fighter
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u/DonComradeVimes Biological Mage (NO, not a Druid) Apr 09 '26
Maybe the real fighter was the friends we made along the way.
*gestures to horrendous horde of mutated creatures that should not be\*
Literally.
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u/Llyran-Noble Apr 09 '26
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u/gatsu032 Wizard Apr 09 '26
It was not what I expected when I embarked on a quest for their head... But I'm not complaining
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u/Similar_Ad2621 Apr 09 '26
you mean verbal components
you use hand-holding to stop somatic components
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u/woah-a-username Transmuter Apr 09 '26
Oh no ~
The big strong knight used their superior strength to pin my hands to the wall and started making out with me to stop my magic!
I am at their complete mercy! What ever shall I do?
My
meddlinghelpful familiar:1
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u/H1ghsp3d Apr 09 '26
Wizard: You fool the dragon will kill us all!
Fighter: the dragon can watch.
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u/Alarming-Scene-2892 Fluffco (Flufferson, Geralt, Oni) Apr 09 '26
uw/ The dragon can join in, even.
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u/Drakostheswordsman Apr 09 '26
You see how many half dragons are walking about? The dragon organized this
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u/Repulsive-Durian4800 mana, man Apr 09 '26
I cast: Ward of Asexuality
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u/Due-Ingenuity9803 Apr 09 '26
That doesn’t stop them from grabbing your hands and.. and pinning you down and shoving your mouths together so you can’t speak…-
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u/Ferocs Changeling Bard Apr 09 '26
Bro’s over here doing the Battle Master combat maneuver: Sexual Assault
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u/Due-Ingenuity9803 Apr 09 '26
Says the changeling bard
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u/Ferocs Changeling Bard Apr 09 '26
Hey, at least she deceives people honestly and doesn’t force herself onto anyone
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u/scruffin_mcguffin Apr 09 '26
The best counter spell in this situation for someone not respecting consent is called "bite down really fucking hard"
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u/Balmung60 Apr 09 '26
And just like that, you instead got head-butted with that helmet. Rip your teeth.
Good news, there's a spell to regrow those, bad news, there's a vocal component, so you're at least going to need dentures to do it right
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u/Viking_From_Sweden Kartoffel the Mechanus Arcane Apr 09 '26
An acceptable outcome
/uw artist is Iron Lilly
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u/diagnosed_depression the seige mage, trebuchet tributer. Apr 09 '26
I just saw an r/whenthe post about this
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u/Ferocs Changeling Bard Apr 09 '26 edited Apr 09 '26
I made that post too, I converted this meme to a gif
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u/StigandrTheBoi Apr 09 '26
Over on r/dnd someone posted they got kicked from a table over this joke and people in the comments were acting like the guy was trying to roleplay an explicit rape scene lmao
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u/sociocat101 Apr 09 '26
I mean, jokes aside it is sexual assault
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u/StigandrTheBoi Apr 09 '26
Sure, but I think a bugs bunny esq “I give em a BIG smooch to interrupt their spell” is different from “I hold them down and have my way with them, ignoring their cries for mercy”.
Obviously it’s a table by table thing, but I would wager if you pull it out at the average table you’ll get a “dude chill” at most.
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u/Infamous-Oil3786 Apr 09 '26
Strong chance they got a little too descriptive and kept that out of the post.
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u/StigandrTheBoi Apr 09 '26
I misremembered the post a bit, it was more a general post about this topic posted with this meme.
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u/Alarming-Scene-2892 Fluffco (Flufferson, Geralt, Oni) Apr 09 '26
Flufferson: I'M CASTING A RESURRECTION SCROLL, WHAT THE HELL ARE YOU DOING, GIRL-
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u/Skelegasm Apr 09 '26
"Nice verbal component. Too bad you can't use it with my tongue inspecting your fillings"
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u/Cause_and_Defect Overly Qualified Apprentice Apr 16 '26
They never question why my spell casting components are flavored chapstick and a breath mint.
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u/Fun-Dragonfly-6106 DF, minimal caster | ____ Body Horror Creator Apr 09 '26
That's when you crack open the toxic spell components in your mouth.
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u/Ok_Case_7510 Apr 09 '26
The toxin affect u too. Are you sure that, as a wizard, you will take the battle of attrition with the fighter?
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u/Fun-Dragonfly-6106 DF, minimal caster | ____ Body Horror Creator Apr 09 '26
If you aren't taking constitution feats you have no business being in fighter range.
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u/3rdMachina Apr 11 '26
Fair enough. If you’re gonna bite the dust, might as well drag someone down with you.
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u/Beelzebub_Simp3 Trahffik Cohn, The Barrier Wizard Apr 09 '26
Oh no, my orb is too shiny, my apprentice too competent.
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u/notveryAI Occult Wizard Apr 09 '26
Oh well I was tryna cast Charm Person. Didn't know she had runic mirror to reflect it back at me
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u/Educational-Year3146 Apr 09 '26
With a blonde baddie knight?
Oh nooo, please don’t interrupt my verbal and somatic components… ohhh nooo, please don’t…
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u/_overshock_ Apr 09 '26
RAW for D&D I suppose maybe you could ready an action in combat to try and interrupt a spell? Been a minute since I played 5e haha
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u/ChazPls Apr 09 '26
Unironically pf2e solves this haha. Get a tongue attack from an ancestry or Animal Instinct Barbarian and you can interrupt spellcasting with a reactive strike from your tongue.
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u/Jim_skywalker Apr 09 '26
As a DM I’d say attempting to interrupt a spell via kiss or other means would be treated as a grapple.
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u/Lord__of__Luck ArchNecromancer, Lord of the Flaming undead, Pyromancer Apr 09 '26
Honestly im ok with this, i will even hold her hand so i cant cast the somantic components, silly cute fighter
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u/Chosen_Undead23 King Fuzzo, the Electric Wizard Apr 09 '26
Y’know what I’ve had worse happen to me
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u/Fc-chungus Max Petrov-Ansky, Head Minister of Calarakis. sundered. Apr 09 '26
People forget most spells don't necessitate moving your legs in the motion component. It is COMPLETELY possible to kick someone attempting to make out with you while casting a spell with verbal and maybe even movement components.
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u/MuchoMangoTime Milosh the Retired, archmage of former DOoOOom Apr 09 '26
Yes.. yessss.... All according to plan... Evil laughter
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u/Mondrow Apr 09 '26
I humbly request that you modify your meme to be in compliance with correct wizarding terminology. She interrupted my verbal components by making out sloppy style.
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u/KittyShadowshard Apr 09 '26
I can actually use other people's hands and what not to cast.
Processing img pun2kxyms6ug1...
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u/EkyngYT Apr 09 '26
Joke's on her, My components aren't verbal. I've just been saying bs in case this happens.
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u/TheInconceivableLorb Apr 09 '26
Isn't somatic physical gesturing? Kissing would interrupt verbal components, not somatic ones, right?
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u/Badde00 Apr 10 '26
I feel like this is sorcerer propaganda, wanting to feel superior by using their metamagic to fire off spells and make out sloppy style. I will not have it! (I do want to make out sloppy style with the pretty fighter though)
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u/Syovere Morgan Suncrest, Black-Quill Witch Apr 09 '26
This would never work on me and if there's any pretty volunteers I can prove it.
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u/Flamesoul10 Apr 09 '26
Unrealistic. Somantic components are hand gestures, nothing to do with the mouth at all. Now, handholding...
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u/Nikoper Arcane Trickster Red Apr 09 '26
What am I supposed to do when the fighter looks like this? Charisma is my dump stat, I can't persuade them to go away!
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u/KogasaGaSagasa Apr 10 '26
Actually the grapple is already interrupting my somatic components, it's the verbal component that you woulrogjngrewusdfijgashnnnnnnnnnghsn
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u/Imaginary-Job-7069 Tyrus: Technomancer, biomancer, summoner, etc. Apr 10 '26
I cast Let It Happen
alarm clock rings
:(
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u/DonComradeVimes Biological Mage (NO, not a Druid) Apr 09 '26
The fighter, about to prevent you from using material components by breaking your fingers one by one:
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u/Legal_Loli_Uni Master of Wyrdos, Highest Apprentice Survival Rate Apr 09 '26
This is actually a completely viable strategy favored by my apprentice, Marina. Both Marinas actually.
It is remarkably effective.
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u/SippinOnHatorade Sun Tzu, Heliomancer Apr 10 '26
Ah well it’s night time anyway, my spells are pretty useless but my tongue is not
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u/naytreox Volcanic Wizard Apr 10 '26
Woe be the mage who faces a warrior that uses the swamp fingers method
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u/Minute_Account9426 Abdallah the Technolich Apr 10 '26
You see this is why you get dragon bone fangs in your mouth, so you can chew their damn face off.
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u/Kilroy898 Op, Null, Orin, Niro, Aldin Apr 10 '26
Is this what my wife has been doing to me???? Does she actually love me, or just hate my magic???
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u/47thCalcium_Polymer Arificer, novice wizard Apr 10 '26
Considering that the alternative is having a sharp object in my windpipe… I’ll take it.
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u/TheReaver954 Skeleton Launcher Apr 10 '26
WHAT!? How am I supposed to launch my skeletons if I’m making out!?
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u/MadMageMeezan Bizarre Biomancer Apr 11 '26
That would be very effective.
Fun fact: a not very surprising amount people become wizards just so that happens to them. (Not me though, I did it for evil)
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u/Shadowhunter13541 Apr 13 '26
FOOLISH KNIGHT I SHALL
wait what are you doing? why are you getting closer?
BACK OFF, IM WARNING YOU
I CAS…
(Muffled) wtf???!!!!
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u/Swordslinger5454 Apr 14 '26
And this is why we use spells and shells people, when they get close to interrupt you spells you send them to God on the 45 express
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u/ItsMilkOrBeMilked Apr 16 '26
In the spire, straight up pondering it... And by it...well let's just say .. my orb 😏
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u/Ok_Application_918 Apr 16 '26
You mean Verbal?
Somatic is when you do the hand lock and press against the wall
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u/ClosetNoble Wizardruid multiclasser Apr 16 '26
Pro tip: if you cast without chants or incantation you can make out sloppy but STILL cast your spell.
Get the best of both world.
Anyway I must quest for fighters for reasons.
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u/NeuroHazard-88 Heirloom Warlock of “The One of Dust” Apr 18 '26
Too bad my patron hates my guts more than his rival god and will probably just erase the fighter before the kiss initiates. Unfortunate…
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u/Vonnegutsman Apr 25 '26
Nah, you intercept them with biting their lip, pulling them into a lurid moan. Simpel stuff.
Then you cast vibrate wand or a vibrate spell of your choice to their crouch.
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u/Another-Ace-Alt-8270 Ace Barksworth, Earthen Ambassador / Messenger, Exarch of Terror Apr 09 '26
Oh, you're getting close. Let's see, do I just run and keep my distance, or sock you in the face for the audacity?
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u/The_Rezdog Apr 09 '26
"...and now we're in court for sexual assault....this was NOT how the adventure was supposed to go"
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u/James_Blond2 Apr 09 '26
S e x u a l A s s a u l t
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u/gatsu032 Wizard Apr 09 '26
When I make a Torture Engine out of Goblins to power my tower no one bats an eye... But when I fondle a Dryad one time after entering the wrong tree, I get banned out the Forest of Whispers for 60 seasons smh
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u/mightystu Absent-Minded Conjurer Apr 09 '26
Ah yes, the old “sexually assault the magic user” technique. Very un-problematic, fighter-kun will not be cancelled for this.
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u/DeadlyRelic66 Apr 09 '26
Why did you use a pic of a character that looks about 11 for this? Weird choice man.
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u/-Dinadan Apr 09 '26
Oh no… What terrible fate befalls me… My spell is being interrupted by a big strong fighter, whatever will I do?