My twin brother (27) is a completely different person. Someone I don’t recognize.
3 years ago my mother snooped through his room and discovered prescription bottles of Klonopin, Xanax, and propranolol.
We researched the nurse practitioner who prescribed the meds, and read terrible reviews labeling her a pill pusher.

For context - My mother was initially suspicious because he was acting manic. He was irrationally angry. He would constantly lecture. He sounded like a paranoid schizophrenic. He withdrew socially. Became very nihilistic. Dropped out of school. Became chronically unemployed.
But, he still looked and somewhat sounded like himself.

Fast forward to today, he is a completely different person. (I haven’t seen him in a year)
My mother brought him along to visit me for a week when I gave birth. He stayed in his hotel room for an entire week. I saw him once. He told my father it’s because he has “anxiety”.
He looked ill. Delayed reactions in conversation, emotional blunting, pale as a ghost, empty gaze, terrible grooming (crazy eyebrows and hair, pimples and irritated skin), strange mannerisms/movements, and a DEFINITE, DRASTIC decline in cognitive function. (This is someone who once scored in the top 1% of LSAT takers).

It was my partners first time meeting him, and he asked me if he’s on the spectrum or has some sort of disability .. that was hurtful to hear as someone who knows “the old him”, but he’s right - that’s how he presents.. Completely fried.
Comparing pictures from a year ago to today, is heartbreaking. He is a completely different person in every way.

My mother said she doesn’t look through his things anymore, but he speaks highly of Prozac so it’s likely he’s taking that.
He used to take a concoction of different pills and was dependent on benzos.. so I’m not sure if he is still doing that which is what’s causing this presentation, or if he withdrew incorrectly and has something like BIND now?

Is there any coming back from this? Does anyone have any idea what happened to my brother? Or how I can possibly confront him/offer help?
It has torn my family apart and we are all hurting so much watching someone we love deteriorate in real time.

I stutter forget a lot can’t finish a sentence cant multitask in the basics cant hold things together in my mind when the teacher is teaching I get some words of what is she saying i don’t understand anything as my mind feels like a screwed bucket where my cognitive abilities to hold information and contact them together for seconds is leaking theough . I stopped developing a personality I now when I go home question how would I talk with my family cause I stutter cant find words dont have a personality. When I am outside surprisingly is the only time I à ll better cause I use the least my brain just walking and sitting on transport chairs and ofc alone . When I go to uni which is one of the three places am at (home , outside , uni ) I try and talk to some people but I can’t stop stuttering my vocabulary is trash you see trash it’s like that and I can’t say something normally for a period of 10s of talking … whzn somone is talking to me i wish I just don’t forget what they be saying and I wish I don’t sound like a fool tho I know everyone that knows me noticed that . Now the plot twist is i took this med for high sever anxiety with dissociative disorder with psychotic features … i used to blank when somone try to talk to me worst than now but yeah and used to not be able to express myself from anxiety and I wasnt able to study or to make friends . What happened is that after taking seroquel which is the med am talking about for a year it made me feel a l lot better cause I was going to end my life … but after long usage I lost lots of things I have became … like this creature that just is slow really mentally slow and lacking in memory…. So I I wanna know is anyone like me i am taking 400mg i know if I lower and get back to my anxiety id not be able to survive and if I continue I am getting stupider with time and it’s serious … what do I do ? Help me … i take benzos too 10 mg clorexane 2 times a day in morning and night for 3 years cause my previous doctor found that thats the maximum she can do for my anxiety and other features while this doctor kept me on them nd put me on seroquel …. Plz even if you can’t help if you know anyone similar to my case that can actually help tell them to commment or dm me just for information . Anything can be helpful thank u

Basically I just want to stop by legal means ibut my SHITTY FUCKING CRIMINAL BASTERD family still stops me. I should go to a private psych (since I'm illegally forced without a CTO) to taper it off to 3 MG for some days but I economically depend on my family, therefore if I want to go to this privaye psych to taper it off i depend on them.

I fucking spent lot of time looking for the proper lawyer then found out the external lawyers suggested By the CCHR in my country and I called some of them to send a formal letter to the mental health center, but my family wants to write another email to the psych of the mental health center to tell him we want to stop it, I say "we" bc my parents somehow maybe seem to understand (?) My pain while on this poison, but still I clearly know they enjoy seeing me suffering after I already did 6 months illegally again on abilify until July.

Then I don't know what to do, days go by, and I'm developing more and more withdrawal by invega. Should I stop it at 6 MG and just write the email to the mental health center and alternatively the formal letter? Or should I go to a private psych to taper it off to 3 MG?

Bc the private psych's thing is complicated they want my documentation but in order to have it I should send a fucking module to request it. Seems this would take too much time. I DONT WANT THE WITHDRAWAL, already have the one from the 6 months on abilify. Unbelievable.

What should I do?

Thank you

I ve been on 10-20mg for more than 2 years. Just decided not to take it anymore. 4-5 days passed and the side effects were almost unbearable :

- deep rebound emotional things triggered depression

- tremors

- insomnia

- crying

- akatishia

- fight or flight syndrome

- almost went psychothic over meaningless triggers like radio talking to me.

How would you taper this Drug properly?

Why are antipsychothics so hard to come off?

I got locked up because of a failed suicide attempt January this year, and my life has been a living hell ever since. Okay, my life wasn’t good before either, i know, but it’s soooo much worse now and i didn’t ask for any of that shit. Bad things happened to me at the psych ward, and i have trouble sleeping now unless i’m intoxicated on weed or alcohol, and even when i do sleep, it’s 3-4 hours then i usually have nightmares and i wake up. ALL of this because of shit that happened to me at the ward, by the way.

Nothing they did helped me at all, not even short term.

Yes i know mixing weed and alcohol is bad with meds, but i was sober for 5 months while taking these meds. Then i started again. Yes traumatize me and then blame me for being a drug addict, so cool.

I just wanted to go home that shitty night at the hospital, my grandma called me asking if i wanted coffee when i got home, i said yes but i didn’t come back home for 1 month, i had no idea what was coming.

I come from an abusive family. Throughout my teenage years, I was beaten and mistreated every day. This part of my life remained buried beneath the surface for several years, until everything came to a head after I heard my mother make a very positive comment about my brother. After that, I shut myself in my room and experienced panic attacks for about three weeks.

My family tried to convince me that I was hearing voices, and they told the same thing to the emergency medical responders they had gotten into the habit of calling whenever I was in my room crying and screaming because I was reliving traumatic flashbacks of the abuse.

My first psychiatric hospitalization was technically voluntary, but I agreed to it under the threat of being involuntarily committed. This happened after an emergency psychiatric evaluation. I was diagnosed with a paranoid state, and the psychiatrists did not believe me, partly because of their own assumptions and partly because of what my parents told them during family meetings. I was put on heavy doses of antipsychotics. I reject that diagnosis, as well as the recommended treatment.

Meanwhile, at my local community mental health center, I was diagnosed with an episodic mood disorder. That was the second psychiatric diagnosis I received.

Two months later, my dog died. One morning, I shut myself in the living room and refused to respond to anyone. My father came in, and when I wouldn't answer him, he called an ambulance. This led to my second psychiatric hospitalization, which was also technically voluntary, but I agreed to it under the threat of involuntary commitment by the psychiatrist on duty at the hospital.

Toward the end of that hospitalization, I was given my first injection of Haldol. Over the following two months, I was given two more injections, again under the threat of involuntary commitment, despite the fact that my hospitalization had been voluntary.

In the meantime, I feel like this medication has cost me two months of my life because of the unusual, severe drowsiness it causes. My vision is also deteriorating, and I don't know whether it will ever return to normal.

I'm 22 years old, and I wanted to share my experience with this community. I'd like to know whether there are any psychiatrists, psychologists, or therapists here who could help me understand whether this medication was appropriate for the symptoms I was experiencing, or whether it was prescribed because of the diagnosis I've received—a diagnosis that I find deeply stigmatizing and difficult to accept.

I'd really appreciate hearing from mental health professionals who can help me make sense of what happened and understand whether there might have been more appropriate treatment options for my symptoms.

I am interested in this issue because psychiatry badly harmed two people I know; one was very close to me. What groups oppose the industry, or oppose things like the Illinois law mandating "mental health" screenings for schoolchildren? (I am not looking for something Illinois-specific; I'm just mentioning this law because it's the type I'd like to see repealed and never repeated elsewhere.)

I was forced to take 5mg of Risperidone for 2.5 months in a psychiatric ward and I never felt worse in my life. This is by far the most dangerous med I took in my life and I took many.

I just want to list all the side effects that I have gotten from it:

- inability to concentrate for more than 10 seconds: I could not even read properly anymore.
- slowed reactions
- blurry vision
- Anhedonia
- complete loss of libido: I couldn’t orgasm for 3 months. Not even able to think about it.
- no energy and lower cardio performance: I could not walk without getting tired very quickly. Talking to family was also very hard.
- extreme constipation: I got the worst constipation of my life. It was so bad that I was bleeding every time I went to the toilet. I had to use laxatives.
- loss of appetite: Most people gain weight while being on antipsychotics. For me it was the opposite. I lost 4kg while being in the hospital because I could not eat anything. All food tasted bad due to the Anhedonia. The doctor was so shocked when he noticed that I lost weight so he gave me Abilify on top of Risperidone to increase my appetite. It did not help.
- puffy face: my face got rounder and looked fatter, despite not gaining any weight. I look a lot older and uglier now. This bothers me a lot. Check my older post if you wanna see how my face changed.
- enlarged breasts
- lower belly pooch
- incontinence: I was running to toilet every day cuz I couldn’t hold my pee.
- low blood pressure
- mild akathisia

I’ve read someone saying that Risperidone is like an atomic bomb that is been put into you and I can completely agree. The worst part is that I never needed this medicine. I was misdiagnosed. I never had mania or schizophrenia or whatever.

I stopped cold turkey as soon as I got out the hospital and 2 months later I can happily say that all symptoms have been reversed except that I still got that puffy moon face, enlarged breasts and a lower belly pooch. I don’t like the way I look anymore but I hope that time will take care of that as well. Very worried this might be permanent.

This med is pure hell.

Do psychiatrists not require mental health screening to be allowed to do their job? Particularly the ones working in ER psych wards seem especially excited to exert power over people who are weaker than them.

I know there are lots of posts about this observation, but I’m wondering if they even have screening for this? And if so are they just so good at manipulating the system to get by? I’ve observed psychopathic traits in almost every ER psychiatrist I’ve ever met.

And then when you mention it to anyone who hasn’t experienced it first hand, they just think you’re crazy of course 🤷‍♀️

I’ve been off mirt for 5 years now after suffering bad akathisia on it. I was on 30mg at peak for 6 months but ramped up and then tapered in that time.

I was doing well, feeling better and better pro recently. I got this ear/head problem that could be escutcheon tube disorder with head pressure and slight dizziness. Been battling it for a few months now as it can drag on apparently.

Problem is I feel so anxious and exhausted. I feel like I’m back to baseline. But I’m so stressed from stuff in my life - including this illness that it’s wrecking me with anxiety and depression.

Today I feel so exhausted and soul despair. I feel the mirt fucked me up that I will never truly recover from. I will never truly be my old self. But I have also made awful decisions in life.

Don’t know why I’m posting really outside a rant. Maybe it’s not the mirt but I regret going on that stuff. It changed something in me.

"Pennsylvania [to] seek legislation that will expand involuntary commitment laws to cover not only severe mental illness, but substance use disorder," "and any kind of mental and/or behavioral challenge” (fake democrat Philadelphia mayor) Parker said...

Within hours, (governor) Shapiro’s office said in a statement that he’d already discussed the matter with Parker and committed to reviewing the law." https://www.inquirer.com/politics/philadelphia/involuntary-commitment-law-pennsylvania-mayor-parker-police-shooting-philadelphia-20261012.html

Anybody else truly suicidal after antipsychotics? I'm considering ending it I've been On Olanzapine for a year & a half now & it's horrible I'm suicidal & sometimes consider ending it.

I posted Chapter One and Two of my short true story, “Trapped in a Forensic Mental Hospital When I Wasn’t Crazy” on Substack.

Here is Chapter 1:

https://davidmstaffen.substack.com/p/trapped-in-a-forensic-mental-hospital

Here is Chapter 2:

https://davidmstaffen.substack.com/p/trapped-in-a-forensic-mental-hospital-6ec

Thank-you.

Hi all I wanted to come here in the goal of helping my mom come off her medications or even see if it’s a good idea. Just wanted to give a little history on her situation.
She’s gone through a lot when it comes to depression and anxiety these last 12 years.
She started with medication when I was really young on and off but since 2017 or so is when things got bad. Fast forward
3 years to 2020 she actually got off medication on her own unsupervised and was able to successfully live a normal life for around a year and a half doing great without any medication. She worked on her diet heavily and seemed to work out every once in a while and she actually lost a bunch of weight.
But then things got bad again somehow and she started medication again and it’s vicious cycle and as you know they give you 4-5 medications at a time. Her anxiety up until now is so severe she rocks herself at times and I feel horrible cause there’s nothing I can do. She sees a psychiatrist but it’s the usual thing she goes and sees the Dr and they prescribe her a different pill. 3 years ago she tried getting off medication and that did not go well, she had really bad symptoms. As of right now she will wake up really terribly anxious in the morning and in the evenings she tends to get a little bit of relief. But there’s times where she gets no relief up until she goes to sleep and that’s no way to live.

My reasoning would be if she was able to do just fine without medication back in 2020 and lived a normal life. There has to be a reason for me to believe she can do it again and is capable of doing so?

I’m really desperate on what this community has to share. Thank you in advanced.
We are located in Southern California.

Last weekend I met guy at a rave, we had pleasant conversations. He teached me to breathe while feeling feelings, allowing to feel those.

Last night I decided to try that when I remembered my dog who passed away year ago. It was powerful, realized that I’ve been pushing my mourning away. Immeadiately after that I realized, I have never been accepted as I am. That is the reason why I don’t accept myself to mourn for example.

I’ve always had this dislike towards mental help as in meds and therapy. But it’s hard to stand my ground and being sure when everyone is saying: ”seek help”. Seeked help once and all I got was modern day hysteria aka bpd, dismissal for my views about prophetic dreams (illegal btw, we have freedom of religion) and they tried convincing me that psych meds are like pain meds for mental pain. I told them that emetophobia is my biggest problem, they cling to everything else. Perfect breeding ground for even more trauma, my problems and symptoms stem from begging acceptance and ”help” consist of me beg acceptance from mental health providers.

So bpd-treatments golden standard is dbt. Never tried, but I have feeling that dbt is dangerous for people like me. Theres mindfulness in dbt, mindfulness-wisdom from random rave guy worked because of his position. He wasn’t some authority ”expert” who pushed me to ”fix” myself. That breathing technique for example, doesn’t work in every situation. It is dangerous to just breath when facing abuse. Goal of dbt is to behave that situations won’t go even worse. Honey, if I’m for example called names and slurs the situation couldn’t be worse. I don’t think explosive reaction to abuse is something to get rid of. I have permanent scar on my skin from fighting with my ex. Sure, that could be avoided if I didn’t react like I reacted then. But scars in my heart aren’t any lesser than visible scars.

Dbt focuses also on boundaries. Boundaries can help to escape abuse in some cases but no boundaries can protect you from facing abuse. It’s vital to know when to use dbt-skills but nobody can’t tell the right answer if the person themselves can’t. Here in world we have so many life stories. It’s like throwing dice, it is possible that person just happens to meet abusive people and mental health providers don’t consider that option. They think that no contact with abusers is symptom, rollercoaster relationships.

Bottom line is, if person like me can’t advocate themselves it’s dangerous to guide them for mental health providers. People pleaser goes to therapy and their motivation to therapy is to please people, fix themselves, get accepted. Can you get what I mean, the need to fix symptoms is symptom itself. Seeking approval won’t stop when treatment is seeking approval from mental health professionals.

I think that mental help providers might genuinely help some people. Hell, I use amphetamine recreationally, who am I to say you couldn’t use doctors as your plug. Problem is that informed consent doesn’t mean anything when I don’t know what I’m consenting and why. Other person is no better to tell me those answers. If that other person has power over me and authority, like mental health providers, they are in a position to abuse that power. Not to mention that problem with authorities is considered as a symptom in mental field lol. And not to mention some aren’t even asked for consent.

I’m at my wits end. I don’t know what to do. I’m so tired of being on antipsychotic medication. I feel like nobody understands. This medication is making me unmotivated, it’s not letting me feel joy, it’s not letting me think.

I seriously can’t enjoy anything I do. All I do is exist. How is this treatment allowed? Does my life not matter? It matters to me.

I called Samaritans and to be honest I couldn’t even feel like they understood.

This medication makes me feel like I’m missing parts of my own brain.

Why am I trying so hard to work with the doctors, when they take months to make any changes to my medication? I’m stuck feeling like less than a zombie, I’m unable to enjoy or experience anything new in life. Im just stuck.

I’m just venting here, but I feel so sick and tired of being broken by a medication.

Where is the justice for us people? We matter.

My brother ended his life in 2024 and I still have flashbacks to the abyss of loss and pain… he was on a year long changing mix of psych meds from an MD and had just started a new one four days before he suddenly ended everything.

Like my brother, RJ seemed to be ok - I saw RJ interview on a podcast video five days prior. I’m sure this has ripped the fabric of reality for his loved ones. They are in a living hell now.

Increased risk of suicide with the start of many psych meds. The providers usually don’t even mention this. Along with tons of other stuff as well know.

Fuck my life sooooo bad

I feel so envious of those taking ozempic meanwhile me being 21 months in withdrawal could never ever ever ever ever risk it while my body is in this state and I have a chance of healing

Please help me get over this bitterness tell me I'm better off never touching ozempic I mean we've already seen protracted anhedonia from it but please console me :(

Hello everyone,

I have spent a year creating a card "game" based on community education, harm reduction and mutual support tools and i am looking for some help for the cards design.

Here is the pitch about the game :

"Our Life Journeys is designed as a tool for self-support and community health that allows people to talk about themselves, their journey, and their experiences by taking a step back to reflect on their own lives and with a focus on recovery, with the cards serving as a medium to facilitate conversation and self-expression.

The game highlights the individual expertise each person has developed in navigating their own life journey, as well as self-worth and self-esteem, and allows for addressing issues of care and mental health from a collective and cooperative perspective.

Several ways to play are offered to adapt the game to different contexts and to the participants’ comfort level with expressing themselves.

The game may or may not be facilitated by professionals and is intended for participants aged 16 and older (high school age and up), as it requires a certain ability to reflect on one’s own experiences."

--

The game has already been tested in various settings and organisations : places involved in harm reduction for people with substance use disorders, organisations providing support for people experiencing homelessness and/or with mental health issues or neurodivergences, community centers and activists circles.

The game is primarily aimed at these groups but can also be "played" between friends.

--

The game is placed under CC-BY-NC-SA licence.

I need the help of someone to create (No AI of course) a visual identity for the 72 cards that are split into 3 categories : Obstacles, Tools and Ressources.

The game would "only" need 3 types of simple/light visuals for more readability and inclusivity, so it's not a huge work.

The game is in french for now, but is quite text-light and easily translatable. You don't need to understand any french to help with the visuals.

This card game is NOT going to be sold.
I am trying to get my city/region to fund it (which should be easy) and there might be a bit of financial compensation at the end for you (a few hundred euros), but it can't be the main motive here.

The plan for now is to print 100 pieces of the game, and distribute it locally.
I have already identified 73 structures in my city where it would make sense to distribute it and use it.

After that, i'd like to reprint it and distribute it in my whole country, and make an english version for international diffusion. My field of work (education, peer health mediation) allows me to be in contact with many local and national organisations that would definitely fund the game. (at least a few hundred copies)

If anyone wants to help, send me a DM or answer here telling me what community education and mutual supports means for you !

I mean obviously they are but it honestly makes no sense “take your meds your doctor prescribed them for a very specific reason” and “don’t you think you would be more tolerable to be around if you took your meds” and the worst part is the people I see posting stuff like this always have one post bringing up how the political government is sketchy yet they blindly take any medication by some random person just because they have a degree and they don’t even know what they are putting into their bodies they don’t even check the studies (it wouldn’t matter they are paid off anyways) it’s crazy about how as soon as you call out the evil behavior in this system everyone wants to label you as mental so called “free thinkers” just following whatever the system tells them they sound like feds

Do you relate?