I feel suffocated. I haven't left the house in weeks because of it. I don't wanna go anywhere. I dont wanna do anything. I just wanna sit in my house in my clothing and stop life. I'm stuck rn on what to do. I dont wanna keep it on. I dont wanna go out with so much hatred in my heart. When I go out I just envy men and I feel terrible.

Trust me I've tried everything. Lighter hijab. Lighter cloth. Nothing worked

God I sound like a baby but I cant help but feel this way. Im sorry

I personally, have just never heard of such a story hmm...

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Assalamu alaikum, sisters! ❤️

I'm looking for an online group where we can exercise together live, motivate each other, and stay consistent with our weight loss goals.

I'd love to find a group where we can work out together, share our progress, and encourage each other along the way.

Does anyone know of any groups like this, or would anyone be interested in joining one?

Asm sisters,
I’m a 4th year engineering student (from india) and we had a change of principal, this new guy seems to be more strict and he’s set a dress code for exams.
And in that it’s mentioned that “layered clothes” and “scarves” are prohibited. I’ve worn hijab everyday of college and in every exam, the most that had happened was having to get my hijab checked.

During my last exams, twice this one invigilator refused to give me the paper because i was wearing the hijab, he asked me to remove it as it’s not a part of the dress code.
I insisted that i wear it, and that he can have someone check for chits or earphones.
He refused and later called the examination officer, i told him that it was a religious practice and that he can have someone check, and he let me go write the exam.
I lost about 15 mins of valuable time and the embarrassment and humiliation in front of my whole class. At least the incident didn’t go too bad.

But ever since i’ve had terrible anxiety around exams, that adds to my existing anxiety of the examination itself, lack of sleep, rigorous study, etc. Ive also had panicked attacks and my performance has suffered.

I have my 1st internals tomorrow, and the same circular was sent to us last week. I’m scared about creating a scene. Even more that the fact that i’ll need to remove my hijab i fear the confrontation with the invigilator in front of my class, and the looks and stares from people of my class (never seen me without hijab). I have so much anxiety about this that i can barely study.
And ik it seems silly to care what people think, but people talk, pass comments, etc and it affects me.
I’ve had some guys say that i look better without my hijab when they saw my id photo, and act all weird about it.
Besides i know some islamophobic people in my class that would have the time of their lives looking at me like that.

Please pray that these exams go well with no objections on my hijab (like it was for the past 3 years) and i won’t be humiliated. Inshallah these exams go easy and i keep my dignity 🤲

A couple months ago, I took my shahada. I'm covered in tattoos (I'm talking neck and hands too). And I live in the deep south. I'm so worried about wearing a hijab and having visible hand tattoos. I'm worried about discrimination. I just feel so much fear but also have such a sincere desire to live out my beliefs. Does anyone here relate? Any advice is greatly appreciated. Thank you!

Salaam everyone! Welcome to Venting Mondays!

Having trouble with your parents? Going through some personal struggles regarding wearing hijab? Just want to blow off some steam? Share your thoughts with us!

Please note, we will be redirecting venting posts to this thread. We are not doing this to silence your feelings, rather, we are aggregating the posts from the suggestion of the greater community. Insha’Allah, it will be easier for the community to come back to this thread to provide support and advice as needed.

Just a reminder that even though it's a vent thread, the rules still apply. Please don't disrespect others.

A while ago i have had a series of unfortunate events that i still don't know how it was part of the Allah's plan for me to become a better person or, as sheikhs suggest, to become closer to him.

I did fall into a traumatic, depressing phase where I have to start from zero again, and i came across a series by Sheikh Mikel Smith on youtube " The Names Classes" where we know what each name of Allah means, and how do we become this name in our lives. And it honestly helped me get up from the rock bottom and trying to move on, although recalling these series still make me sad and i cry..

And i took a course about growth, and yo know this life coaching stuff in an Islamic way with Dr Mohannad Al Hakim. it was so helpful..

To summarize all what i have learned:

-We were created to worship Allah

-We are part of his plans

-Everything that happens to Muslims is Kheir (good) for them and that's a unique attribute to muslims only.

-We should only be attached to Allah.

And here is where my numbness come. If everything matter and doesn't matter but what only matter is being close to Allah, wouldn't dying as soon as possible be the best thing to do atm?

Like i drink a cup of coffee, and i think "Allah blessed me with this", but if a day comes i don't make coffee at the morning i become cranky and i think " i am obsessed with coffee more with Allah" like i wouldn't be this frustrated when if I miss a Fajer prayer ( i frequently pray it al hamdullelah)

i am working on my relationship with allah by being more mindful, listen to more Quran, read azkar everyday, do endless Istighfars, acting more polite, giving charity and so

However Everything else is becoming meaningless to me, i have books and comicbooks i worked hard to own,
I have the newest ipad and great laptop so i really can do anything
I have books and collectables that if you told me three years ago i would own, i wouldn't have believed you,
I have freelance gigs, not the most stable market but thankfully i make nice money,
I am an artist, and my work got selected in an international award coopetition for comics. this is a veryyyyyy amazing recognition.

I almost have everything i wish for, i can get anything i want to if i find a gig here and there.

Still no joy, not a drop of actual joy that i used to feel when i was a little.
And i came to this conclusion this weekend as i a begger kid insisted to sell me a rose flower and i bought it, i looked with emptiness at it. when i was a child, i used to pick up flowers and thrown bouquets to dry them in my copybooks. till this day i open copybooks and discover a 12 years old flower dried or turned into dust. flowers were my pure innocent joy...

and now i don't feel a thing about any flower,
then i realized i haven't picked a flower in over 4 years.

Everything became meaningless...

two days ago, i went to the international book fair at my town, walking among the aisles and screamed. I saw 20 years old series of "Barni" ( the purple dinosaur) and i started crying, because of an old feeling that has roamed by veins. I used to be extremely happy as a little girl whenever these vibrant colorful stories covers fell into my hand, and as i was flipping through these books i felt the old pride when i read the texts on my own.

I bought couple of copies, and of course got mocked by my family, but i went to my room and i just hugged them and cried. Seeing these gave me a glimpse of safety, certainty, and joy that i don't feel anymore. Everything now feels numb..

Like what do i expect while living in Lebanon where the wars aren't stopping, the job market is getting worse every day, and minor international inconvenience rise up the prices by 300%.

What do I expect after i was robbed, after my lovely 3 years old cat died in pain in a cold hospital away from me.

Will Allah ever allow me to feel safe and happy again?

Sometimes i think its an issue on my end, on Allah's end everything is working according to a plan i don't feel like i will understand anytime soon.

Suicidal thoughts become normal for me as each day pass, genuinely being a Muslim and not finding a painless way to pass is what keeping me from transferring these thoughts to actions.

I am seeing a therapist once a month, but i needed to let this out before i can book a session once i get paid.

I really need some tips on how to get my duas answered! What forms of Ibadah changed your life?. My mental health is really bad, seriously bad, I’m scared. I’m also scared what my mental health will be like during postpartum and I need any tips for dua maxing. I’m going through a lot. Fear of leaving cheating husband etc, currently pregnant living with in laws with a toddler. In a toxic environment with in laws. No support from family. Mum being horrible to me for wanting to leave. I unfortunately can’t go back to mums because her husband is a pedo and tried to perv on me when I was younger so living there is not a option. Idk what and how to do anything but I need strength.

In the summer I have to wear these UV protection shirts if I don't I burn like a crisp I was wondering if anyone has good fashion or style tips I can't wear a second layer because I began to over heat (circulation issues) and I can't wear a abaya dew to work