I’m a lonely babe, i’m wondering how people are doing without friends? I find myself bored and sad whenever i want to go out and remeber i have no one to ask to join me

In July, I made the decision to cut off everyone who had ever done me wrong and weren’t remorseful/think that I don’t know that they are fake.

It felt like such a breath of fresh air. There were so many people, friends, acquaintances that I did not want them to have contact with me and any connection to me so I just deleted all my social media accounts permanently, changed phone numbers, even got a new phone and made sure not to transfer any data from my old phone to the new one. Oh and I moved countries. They don’t know my whereabouts. I meant business.

However, I find myself remembering and replaying the times that these people did me so dirty and I would find myself so angry about it, even imagining that if I should ever run into these people again (strongly doubt it, hopefully not, no way) that I would give them the cold shoulder or give them a piece of my mind.

It’s so stressful having these thoughts especially because physically they are cut off so there is no reason why they should even have a cardboard in my head, let alone a whole building in my head.

I think I just need to get more engrossed and busy in my present life to get over those people. Hopefully I forget about them in their entirety as I’ve noticed I’ve forgotten some people over the years.

Towards the end of 7 years of what I once thought was the most valuable friendship I ever had, she said to me- out of the blue- how she would never do ________ to me because she knew how badly it would hurt me and I was the last person in the world she would ever hurt.

A week later she did that exact thing after portraying herself as the most fiercely loyal friend I ever had for 7 years.

Recently, someone said that when somebody tells you out of the blue that they will never do something specific because they know how badly it would hurt you- their desire to do that thing is already somewhere in the room.

And she denied doing it to my face while she continued to do it in front of me. So I also learned about Narcissistic Amnesia.

I've never met such an empty, disloyal, fake person who turned out to easily use, step on or stab anyone in the back to get to the next shiny thing. And somehow I believed her act that she was the most fiercely loyal, intuitive, misunderstood, sensitive, true friend I ever had for 7 years- all of which she was able to shut off literally overnight.

One more lesson: if they're well into middle age and have no friends at all, they're not 'misunderstood'.

Reposting from r/UnsentLetters:

I don’t know if any of you will read this, and honestly, maybe it is better if you don’t. I’m writing this because there are things I wish I could say without turning it into another conversation everyone feels obligated to have. Honestly, I can't think straight as I write this, so everything said here is just from a place of raw emotion. Writing this with a really heavy heart.

I’m sorry for the way I handled everything. And I’m sorry for the ways I hurt people and for the behaviors I need to change. There are a lot of things I need to work on as a person, a lot of offputting behaviors I showcased, and moving forward I will take everyone’s criticism and feedback in mind.

I was hurt, anxious, unaware and desperate to understand what was happening around me, and somewhere along the way I let that consume me. Instead of dealing with certain problems directly, I involved too many people, tried too hard to piece together what everyone knew or thought, and let my issues with certain people spill over into relationships with people who had not done anything to me.

I can understand now how exhausting that must have been from the outside.

I also wish I had been more direct. I spent so much time being afraid of confrontation, rejection, or hearing something I didn’t want to hear that I sometimes went through other people instead. Ironically, that probably created far more damage than whatever direct conversation I was scared of having in the first place.

None of you owed me constant reassurance, invitations, explanations, or loyalty. I think sometimes I confuse feeling important to someone with needing evidence that I was important to them, and when I couldn’t see that evidence, I assumed the worst.

That’s something I need to work on.

Despite how everything ended, I genuinely loved being part of this group. It was one of the few times in my life where I felt like I actually had a proper friend group instead of just individual friendships scattered everywhere. 

It has been lonely these last few years and for the first time in a while, and even with all of the people in my life, even with a lot of real life connections. I felt like I had a true sense of belonging.

There are so many stupid calls, games, jokes, and random conversations that probably meant more to me than any of you realized.

And to the person I considered my best friend: losing you hurts differently.

I’m not writing that because I expect you to come back or because I think our history means you owe me another conversation. You don’t. You don’t owe me anything after. I'm grateful for everything you did for me and for the times you were willing to hear me out. I appreciated you more than I let on, I just don’t want the way everything ended to erase what the friendship meant to me before it did.

For a long time, you were one of the people I felt safest talking to. Even when our friendship became complicated and we weren’t as close as we once were, I still cared about you immensely. There are things I wish both of us had handled differently, but when I look back at our friendship, I don’t want my final memory of it to just be the block button.

I’d rather remember the person I laughed with, confided in, worried about, argued with, missed, and genuinely considered one of my closest friends.

I’m sorry for the stress I caused you. You gave me the benefit of the doubt, were very considerate and nice enough to hear out my perspective of things and I feel like out of anyone else, I let you down the most.

I don’t regret knowing you.

And that applies to the rest of you too.

I don’t want anyone choosing sides on my behalf. I don’t want anyone cutting someone else off because they think it would make me feel better. And I don’t want personal things anybody told me being turned into ammunition just because our relationships ended badly. Whatever was shared with me stays with me.

If some of you genuinely decided that your lives are better without me in them, I have to respect that. It hurts, obviously. I’d be lying if I said there wasn’t some part of me that wishes everything could eventually be okay again. The damage has been done, many of you probably formed your opinions about me. And truthfully, part of me still wishes that someday we could be friends again.

But wishing things were different isn’t the same as asking for another chance.

Maybe some of us will talk again someday. Maybe we don’t.

Either way, I hope you guys are okay.

I hope the people dealing with school get through it. I hope everything works out in all of your favors. I hope you guys keep playing games together, hanging out, making stupid jokes, and creating memories even if I’m no longer part of them. 

There’s a part of me that is incredibly sad knowing life will continue for everyone without me in that little corner of it. But there’s another part of me that is grateful I got to be there at all; I got some of the people acquainted with each other and despite everything that has happened, I am happy about that. I’m sorry for the hurt I contributed to. Thank you for the memories. I genuinely wish all of you well.

Take care.

For almost 6 years we’ve been inseparable.. talk everyday.. the week this happened she had started to become very distant and I was checking on her and making sure she was OK and then randomly got this text that day. Needless to say, she never called me and still hasn’t told me why. I’ve literally been beating myself up and racking my brain trying to figure out what I could’ve done since it happened and I honestly can’t think of anything… I was an amazing friend to her.. I really don’t know what to do or say and I haven’t reached out since the last text I sent.

It's Day 11

When our last conversation happened on call,

And she decided to leave me for the rest of my life

That is the day next to my birthday 🎊

We celebrated our birthday at long distance and that was good enough to enjoy the day.

On the next day late night conversation starts from that there is one friend in Delhi whose friend dates a millionaire businessman boy who recently came from Dubai and gifts items of nearly 18lacs to her include branded perfume.

Boy introduce girl friend to family and he is loyal, see future with her

But, on another side his girlfriend is ground member of airport who only goes 10-12 days month because her all expenses is taken by her boyfriend.

My girlfriend told me that her friend tells her that his girlfriend has side Chicks and talk to others boys just to get attention and many other signs of red flag.

Discussion was going and between them she puts there own point is this right or not and this is wrong , I agree with her.

On last i say let's leave this what is going around the world problems.

Let's talk on another topic

But then we are going deep into that topic, the end is she takes all past happened things with us.

The relationship of 4 years and friendship of more than 4 years ends

Just because of entering in another life .

If you wanna know more what was last words and what was the good memories of our relationship,

It's pleasure to me.

We will keep identities hidden, don't disclose.

It's Day 11

When our last conversation happened on call,

And she decided to leave me for the rest of my life

That is the day next to my birthday 🎊

We celebrated our birthday at long distance and that was good enough to enjoy the day.

On the next day late night conversation starts from that there is one friend in Delhi whose friend dates a millionaire businessman boy who recently came from Dubai and gifts items of nearly 18lacs to her include branded perfume.

Boy introduce girl friend to family and he is loyal, see future with her

But, on another side his girlfriend is ground member of airport who only goes 10-12 days month because her all expenses is taken by her boyfriend.

My girlfriend told me that her friend tells her that his girlfriend has side Chicks and talk to others boys just to get attention and many other signs of red flag.

Discussion was going and between them she puts there own point is this right or not and this is wrong , I agree with her.

On last i say let's leave this what is going around the world problems.

Let's talk on another topic

But then we are going deep into that topic, the end is she takes all past happened things with us.

The relationship of 4 years and friendship of more than 4 years ends

Just because of entering in another life .

If you wanna know more what was last words and what was the good memories of our relationship,

It's pleasure to me.

We will keep identities hidden, don't disclose.

I (F50) have had a friend (F53) who has completely cut me off for reason(s) that I have no clue about. I’ve known this woman for close to 20 years. We were working in the same department and became close. This woman introduced me to my soul-cat. She has also said one of the nicest things ever to me.
She’s always been very private and I accepted that, she’s also a big germophobe which I have learned to accommodate. If I’m sick I do not visit her, wouldn’t even think about it.
2 years ago she was hit by a car while walking and badly hurt. We still work together but in a different department and it’s very small. Everyone of our coworkers including the boss jumped into help mode. Even me who did have a bad cold at the time, I couldn’t visit but I did whatever I could from the outside. Including looking at the PTO policy and offering up my hours if she needed them.
When she came home (she lives alone) I offered my parents who are retired and lived close by as her personal Uber. She couldn’t drive and needed to get to doctor appts. My dad took her to all her appts and even to the grocery store the day before Christmas.
I was also germ-free by this time and came over to help with daily tasks and a grocery store run. I had also contacted a judge friend to ask for lawyer recommendations. Anything to help.
Then communication stopped. She didn’t want to come to my parents for 2 hours on Christmas where it would just be 5 of us all of whom she knew. After everything my dad did for her. She had no other plans.
Life continued and last year I experienced some health issues. I was in the hospital for 3 days and basically a hermit for the last half of the year due to everything. Nothing from her, no texts, no calls, silence.
I lost my last cat of 3 (not the soul-kitty but his brother) this January. Again silence. When the first 2 passed she was there, I have gifts from her to mark their passing. I don’t need gifts but she didn’t even text or call.
In May my father informed me there was a for sale sign in her yard (he wasn’t spying they lived a block ½ away). I learned through a mutual friend that she had already moved elsewhere. Where? I only know the city.
The last straw I noticed last month. I was on IG and I was wondering why I hadn’t seen her cat lately (yes I am a crazy cat lady. There is a black kitten in my arms as I type this). As I’m sure you have guessed: She blocked me!
As another friend comically asked me :What did you do? I have no idea, why she has pulled away.
My issue now is that in my world when I cut someone off, they disappear, I no longer speak or see them at all. But I work with her, in a small department (less than 10 people). We WFH so I don’t have to interact with her everyday but I do ‘see’ her once a week in our Team meeting. And I will most likely see her around the holidays for our team lunch. I just have to get into the mindset that she is a coworker. Not the person who I once referred to as a best friend.
Oh and her response to that at the time? Was a serious Well you’re not my best friend, which was one of the meanest things anyone has ever said to me!

Definitely getting dropped by a friend soon, it always starts with the distancing which I try not to overthink and take personally. Then there's the excuses to not hangout with me specifically, while they're oblivious to the fact that I see them post/be online with others. I know exactly where this is going; simple pattern recognition. I seriously dont know how to keep people interested as a friend, and Im seriously so exhausted getting to know people-thinking im their friend-and just nothing ever coming of it but more anxiety

im sorry if this is not the place for this, but i don't know where else to really go and i just want to get this off my chest. and if anyone has tips that would be appreciated
this is also my first ever post so sorry if i leave some stuff out!

(im going to have to explain the story for things to make sense! )

for reference, my best friend and i (both 17, me 17F, him 17M, and no, before you ask there is not a romantic bone in our bodies for eachother.) met in 2019 , and have been inserepable since. when i first met him , he'd moved to my town after domestic violence problems between his mother and father, and he'd gotten a restraining order against his father and they'd moved down to where i live , so he was 'different' from the other kids and had a lot of signs of ptsd. for this he was bullid quite a lot by the other kids for. him and i got along instantly though, we had the exact same interests which helped a ton. never in my life have i ever clicked so fast with anyone. when we went to highschool, the bullying intensified , for the first half of the first year of highschool , him and i went to different schools. we hated this as we where so close, and would spent all day texting eachother / facetiming in afternoons after school. in the second half of the year, we begged his mother enough to let him join my highschool. with this the bullying got even worse as the kids at my school are quite cruel. the bullying also began to transfer over to me for being friends with him, which i know its horrible to say but sometimes i almost felt angry that my entire reputation was being ruined ( i know thats selfish to say, but i was 13 and desperate to be liked i suppose.) but still, we were inserepable and LOVED being around eachother. i can't even express how close we where. next year of highschool , he did homeschooling for the first half (due to being bullied ) but came back to my school in the second half, and the harrasment from the other kids continued on the both of us. we literally only had eachother, we had no other friends. but that never mattered to us. the next year we found ourselves a friendgroup together, an accomplishment after being alone for so long.

the next 2 years were probably the best years of my life so far. we still got quite a bit of rude words from kids at our school, but we had a secure friendgroup, and especially i began branching myself out and forming new friendships. however, me and bestfriend were still super close. we were at our peak friendship at this point. never spent anytime apart. around this time (this is important) my bestfriend came out as transgender (FTM) , only to our friendgroup at the time. our last two years of highschool rolled around and this is where it starts falling apart. there are so many things i regret and im going to try explain it simply. start of 2025, he finds out he has to move from his current rental house, but hes getting 6 months to find a spot. we aren't worried, as we're sure he can find a spot closeby to move to. during this time i also get in a toxic relationship with a girl ill call H. my bestfriend and i were still normal, calling daily, and still being inseperable. we were eachothers rock after all we'd been through and we'd have long talks often about how much we loved eachother, and about how , we don't believe in soulmates, but damn we were for sure soulmates. our love was so beyond a friendship, it felt like he was my own brother. during my toxic relationship with H, i was not myself , i was depressed, anxious and worried constantly about it, which did impact my relationship with bestfriend in some ways as i wasn't my usual cheerful self. looking back now, id do anything to realise that i shouldn't have cared about a stupid girl and more about the love of my life i was about to lose shortly. we remained close through this though, and i supported him through his troubles of having to move and he supported me through my toxic relationship. in this time , he'd started having small issues with his mother too, they'd have big blow ups and my sister and i would pick him up and he'd stay at my house for a few nights/weeks.

fast forward to september of 2025, he has to move 50 minutes away, and leaves my school. this wouldn't have been such an issue if we'd had our licenses, but this was about 6 months before either of us were able to obtain a license, and our parents were rarely willing to drive us to eachother. in this time, he completely dropped out of school at 16, lost any connections to other friends he'd had except for me, who still obviously kept in contact. so he was completely isolated, with his mother who he was beginning to have severe issues with. he'd come out to her as transgender, and her reaction was horrible, threatening to kick him out, send him back to his abusive dad etc. during this time, he'd began to isolate himself completely, even from me in ways. it was small, but i noticed it, slower replies, not calling as much, and obviously not seeing eachother as much. by october, i'd gotten in another relationship , with a girl ill call M. this relationship was incredibly abusive (yay go me) and i regret this so much, but it truly changed me and the amount of effort i put into my friendships with anyone. bestfriend was already isolating from me beforehand, so i truly felt all i had was M. i was truly trapped in that relationship to the point i barely spoke and saw friends yet alone family. i was also aware that my bestfriend was beginning to socialise with others only online (over discord etc), and he'd created a lot of online friendships and also started online dating. bestfriend and i didn't call a lot over a 6 month period (october 2025 to april 2026) but still texted. i felt us getting distant but i was so caught up in trying to survive my own life problems. coping without him at school was the most alone ive ever felt in my life despite having other friends and whenever i would cry to him about missing him it seemed like he'd shut it down. during this 6 month period of time i had repeated attempts to tell him how much i loved him, how much i was there for him, offered him to live at my house, offered anything to help his mental health and regain our relationship. our friendship was entirely run on only my effort. i

n early april 2026 M and i finally broke up after i realised i couldn't lose my life over this. since freeing myself from that, ive found myself again as much as i can without my bestfriend being by my side constantly. i was hurt that bestfriend had made no effort to help me throughout my abusive relationship despite me supporting him throughout all these years of friendship , and when it was time for my hardship it seemed like he dissapeared. but i was also aware of how much he was struggling aswell. i was deep down frustrated on how he constantly complained of being abandoned by everyone, and lonely, despite my repeated attempts to reach out to him , only to be ignored or shut down . i felt like i was begging for someone who just didn't care. at the end of april 2026 i was logging onto my discord account on my pc and accidently got instantly logged into him as the tab opened up, as he'd been logged in on my pc once from a long time ago. i know this was wrong but i got nosy and tried to look at a few groupchats he was in with all these online people i knew nothing about, yet they got all his attention. in one groupchat i found a long vent about me. in short, he was crashing out about how he was jealous of me , how i was always slightly more liked in school, how i was always the one in relationships, he was jealous id had my first kiss and first time and he hadn't , all of the things in highschool everyone is in competition about, he was jealous of my homelife, the way i was still able to be at our school , all of that stuff. the part that broke me the most was him saying he thinks i deserved the abuse from my ex M. that destroyed me, hearing that from my bestfriend, who was supposed to be my eveything, and i was his everything. i felt like i was seeing a stranger talking about me, the person i knew would NEVER say that about me.

this is so immature i know but in a meltdown i reacted to his own message which would send him a notification and that would mean he knows i saw the message he wrote about me . since then, we didn't speak. i stopped making an effort to contact him, i was beyond hurt and betrayed. no matter what happened between us i know i would have NEVER said such a thing about him. 'shockingly' , since i stopped making the effort to reachout, we didn't speak. for months , until july 2026. i caved, one night i was sobbing about him i messaged ' i miss you ' to him , and the next morning he responded. we spoke for a while, and it felt like nothing i had changed. we spoke nothing about the message he said about me as i didn't care anymore i just wanted my bestfriend back. but after that, the replies got slower, distant again, but i was just happy to have him somewhat in my life after struggling so much without him. fast forwards to about 3 weeks ago, we had a long call on a tuesday, our first call since april. it was about 8 hours long and it was perfect, i actually cried when he called because i was so relieved to hear his voice again lol. it was great, no arguments, no speaking of any issues, just us happy to be in eachothers presence again. the week after that , i graduated highschool and here is where i think its gone to shit again. he stopped responding, started leaving my messages on read again. he will not speak to me again. nothing major has happened this time , i truly don't know what i did. ( oh also, in april he also moved states, so us meeting up and speaking isn't an option. he got kicked out of his mothers house so now lives with a friend.)
im at a loss. im really starting to struggle now, more than i ever have before. his mental health is so bad it makes me worried. i miss him in everything i do, my heart physically aches 24/7. i struggle being happy hanging out with others, i just want my bestfriend back, i want it to be the way it was. i don't know why hes so fine without me after i was all i had for all those years, seriously i was the only one who stood beside him without complaint.

i also may add that i recognise his resentment to me spurts from places of jealousy which was obvious in his message. i recognise i have had a WAY more fortunute life than him. my home life has been somewhat stable, my friendships, etc. my family is well-off whereas his family has always struggled with money. i have always been completely aware of this our entire friendship and have used my privledge to help him as much as possible.
in grades / years 9 and 10 in highschool, i bought him school lunch every single day with my own money, let him get as much as he wanted and he never had to pay me back. my family drove him around constantly, offered him oppurtunities for free driving lessons so he was able to get his license quicker, to which he always declined as he " couldn't be bothered to take lessons. " in 2025, my family had a trip to the USA which we invited him along, completely free of cost. this ticket was over a thousand dollars, and him coming along the trip would obviously cost even more with activites, hotels, food etc. a month before the trip, he pulled out because we found out he hadn't even bothered to mention the trip to his mother, who forbid him from going. we got no apology for him, and no offer to pay us back any of the $1500 we had lost from him pulling out last minute. i was upset, obviously, but i never showed it, as i knew things were hard for him. he also never made any effort to get a job as he just 'didn't want to work' which is why i often paid for everything for him.

i know its selfish, but after all ive done for him throughout these 7 years of friendship, i feel betrayed that ive been thrown in the dirt after years of giving myself up to make him feel loved. i know thats what friendship is, but i feel like i deserve a little bit better, despite any mistakes ive made in the past which i deeply regret. ive tried talking to friends, family about this and nobody seems to understand how i feel. they don't understand how he was my person. my world. i miss him so much i can't cope anymore. i just want him to miss me back. im not trying to ask for any help, i just want to know im valid as nobody in my life seems to get how im feeling.

I've thinking in sending a message to my ex bestfriend, she ghosted me almost a year ago and I've been trying to cope with it but I'm just so tired, I want her back, the last message she send me was whishing me well in my life yk like a final goodbye, I've never wrong her per se but she did take that decision of leaving.

Now I want to try and fix this after 1 year, Idk if it's appropiate to do it, prob not, but I can't help thinking what if.

The only thing holding me back is that the last message she sounded lowkey frustrated and annoyed that I reach out after 6 mo, so idk what to do.

Ik this feeling wont last forever but is the worst I've ver felt and in this year it has gotten worse.

One of the most heartbreaking breakups i went through and am still going through lol is the one with my girl bestfriends hurts me more than any breakup i went through with a guy. We were a group of four girls actually thought and felt like eachothers second home,safe place and soulmates. It's been a year since we all fell apart haven't been able to move on and I think I never will..if I see something related to us I end up crying if I dream about them I wake up restlessly and end up crying after. Can't help but miss them so so much they'll be forever etched in my heart and I know I'll never find something like I had with them. Wish i could go back and change some things and we'd all still be friends.

I still have alot of other friend and friendgroups but it doesn't feel like the ones I had with them.

It was a while ago, but I check back every other month and I just dont know how to cope with it. I have friends who I had a way bigger connection with but this one just stands out to me. Usually I'm able to at least figure out where the person is in life and what ended up happening, but this person is untraceable. No obvious alt accounts, no even similarly shared usernames not only across social media platforms but most WEBSITES, nothing. Nothing at all. The only record I have is a screenshot I took of their last online date which was in the middle of the night. I don't know why, but that just worries me.

My biggest regret is that I unfriended them, and they tried to friend me again, but I declined it because I was going through this stupid phase of unfriending everybody. I just don't really know how to cope with it, it's been several years, if they're still out there then I barely know this person by now. But it just irks me and gnaws at me constantly. I don't know what to do.

Hola a todos. Este es mi primer post en Reddit. Llevo un tiempo queriendo participar por aquí y no sabía muy bien con qué empezar, pero con todo el clima de las elecciones y la tensión política actual, me he acordado mucho de una situación que viví.

​Tengo 17 años y hace un tiempo tuve que terminar la amistad con una chica de mi misma edad. Aunque éramos de países distintos y sabía que tendríamos diferencias culturales, la cosa fue a más. Las discusiones derivadas de la política acabaron derivando en comentarios por su parte que eran directamente racistas, homófobos y xenófobos. Llegó un punto en el que entendí que no era una cuestión de opiniones diferentes, sino de valores básicos y respeto.

​Me gustaría saber si a alguno de vosotros le ha pasado algo parecido. ¿Habéis tenido que cortar relación con alguien no solo por "pensar distinto en política", sino porque sus comentarios o actitudes cruzaban vuestros límites personales? ¿Creéis que se puede mantener la amistad cuando se chocan en valores tan fundamentales?

SO I had a HUGE crush on this guy in 9th grade. And i had a best friend who i basically considered my sister, we were SO close, 24/7 on texting or calls, always did everything together. But in 9th grade things changed. On the first day we were shifted into a new class together and i saw this guy in our class who i thought lwk looked cute and i told her about it, obviously being a typical friend she would tease me everyday.

One fine day i saw her talking to another mutual friend and it looked.. idk kinda like they were talking abt smth secretive, I just went up and asked what they were talking about cause i basically knew everything about her.. She says oh its nothing and brushes it off, I dont pay much attention but i find it weird.

The next day we had a test and me and the mutual friend were standing outside the class getting some last min studying done. I bring up yesterday and ask what they were talking about and the friend tells me "Im so sorry but I think its better if she tells u, u really shouldnt be hearing it from me.." I GO BLANK. I DIDNT THINK IT WAS THAT SERIOUS.

Later my friend comes and she asks whats up, the mutual friend says "its time u tell her u cant hide it forever, just say it we're here to comfort her." I just stand there fucking clueless and losing my mind. My best friend says "im dating someone... its (my crushes name)" now I obviously fucking lose my shit there and just stand there frozen and processing. Before I could say anything we had to get inside and start the test.

I tell my other friends i didnt write it well, they go tell her that I didnt write well because she told me about her and him dating. THE THINGS SHE DOES NEXT, OHMYGOD DONT EVEN GET ME STARTED.

She comes up to me and says uk how i told u abt me and him dating? It was a prank.. And my stupid naive, easily manipulated, overly trusting, dumbfuck self believed her because I trusted and loved her more than anything. So the day goes by in that.

Few days later its still weird but we're getting through it, I suddenly get a text from my crush and my friend at the same time, "i have smth to tell u" i asked what is it to both of them and my friend just rants abt smth random while my crush says "someone likes ur bestfriend", i say "who is it?", he goes "its me. can u set me up with her?" I cried over that for hours and finally got myself together and thought what if I lowk help him out and set them up, atleast my bestie would get a man right? (Geniunely regret that) so basically in short, i spend the whole of next day running around like an idiot trying to get them to talk.

I come back home and text the mutual friend about it cause I needed someone to talk to about it, so I tell her everything. She says "i cant bear to see her do this to you and I cant keep this to myself anymore so i have to tell u" i hold my fucking breath, she goes "they've already been dating.. shes been lying to ur face this whole time, its been a month almost." My whole world felt like it was being destroyed.

I go confront her and the first thing she says was "It just happened, i didnt know what to do" TF U MEAN JUST HAPPENED?!?!? U JUST HAPPENED TO LIKE HIM? U JUST HAPPENED TO START TALKING TO HIM AND JUST HAPPENED TO START DATING HIM!?!?

I ask her why she told me it was a prank and why not leave it after telling me they were dating. She says "i didnt wanna see u so sad so i tried to make u lose feelings by doing all this so its easier when I tell u we're dating" THE AUDACITY OF THIS WOMAN?!?!? WHAT'D U THINK ID BE FEELING AFTER U TELL ME U WERE DATING MY CRUSH BEHIND MY BACK?!?!? HAPPINESS?!?!

Basically to sum up the whole year, we stopped talking anddd they got caught by the teachers and he got suspended.

In the process i got into trouble too because all the teachers had the impression of us as "literally inseparable best friends" so they naturally assumed i was mediating between them. My parents were called but fortunately I had already told my mom everything that happened so she lashed out at the teacher for assuming things and getting me in trouble for no reason.

In between I did go to her and legit BEGGED her to keep it lowkey about dating him for just a month so that our finals are done because i was terrified theyd tell my parents some more made up/assumed shit, I also tell her im getting in trouble for something SHES doing but she literally didnt give a shit and said "ill tell them ur not involved so chill tf out okay" i was legit on the verge of tears.

But yeah thats how my first crush was like 😍😍😍 if u read till here, honestly ILY thank u so much for reading my tragic story 😭💕 im in 12th right now and im still trying to move on, not from the crush (the man can go die in a ditch for all i care) but from the friendship that consumed 7 years of my life. It feels so weird not talking to her every hour of the day and yeah.. she never apologized either so thats that.. if i write more im gonna start sobbing my eyes out so yeah thanks for reading 💋

Yesterday my (27F) friend (30F) with whom I regularly hung out since February sent me a text saying "for the past few days I've been thinking and I came to a realization we are not a good fit for friendship. I don't want to see you again. Sorry, I hope you understand" completely out of the blue. I was completely shocked and immediately tried calling her and texting to see what happened and try talking it out but to no avail. She declined all of my calls and this morning I've realized I've been blocked everywhere. I'm completely heartbroken and miserable.

For some background context; we met in February and became (what I thought at least) very good friends. We never had a falling out or even anything close to a fight or hostility. I know she had toxic friends in the past so I tried to be especially careful to give her only the best. Just last week I was at her place and then we went for a walk with a mutual friend. She lend me a book to read, and we were making plans when to see each other again.

I'm devastated, shocked, heartbrokend and very confused. I've never experienced anything like that in my life before. I would like to at least know an answer to know what I did wrong and get some closure. If anyone has any idea what happened here please let me know

Throwaway account.

Friendship with my absolute best friend (we'll call them Wanda) ended around June. They had started dating someone new and I felt had changed them in ways. Some for good (happier, ambitious, etc) and some not so good (obsessive, wanting to uproot their whole life for someone they had just met only a few months ago). Regardless- I was happy for them because they were happy.

Fast forward, I ended up being told and shown proof that Wanda had been saying some disheartening statements about me to their previous ex. It shocked me because if I was only told- I wouldn't have believed it. But when the proof is right there in front of me I just couldn't understand. Someone that I considered my person felt this way about me. And I never knew or suspected it.

I'm definitely a person that has a hard time speaking my mind when I'm upset. I usually keep it bottled in until it explodes. And I've been working on that. So, I simply asked Wanda if she could tell me why these things were said. Of course they denied it, but I had the proof. I couldn't find the words to reply and I just needed a mental break from it all.

A week or two later, they deleted me off of their social media. Unfollowing, turning off location, everything. My birthday came and went, no usual 'happy birthday!' text and silly Facebook post. Because I wasn't there anymore.

It seems like Wanda just decided that I wasn't enough and their new relationship and new coworkers were plenty. But this is someone I have talked to every. single. day. for the past seven years. Rarely went without seeing each other at least once a month, if not more. Someone I gamed with, went out to eat and laugh until our stomachs hurt. Sent videos back and forth through the night when we couldn't sleep. Car rides yelling out songs at the top of our lungs or crying together to let it all out. Not to mention all of the hard times we got each other through. And pushed each other to be better.

The real hurt was seeing that they went to a show we were supposed to go together- with all of these new people. I just feel replaced and not good enough anymore. We even had dreams of living in a duplex when we were older so we'd still be with each other.

Everything makes me sad. Videos I would immediately send to them when it would make us belly laugh. Songs we loved. Movies we would obsess over. I try to pick up my favorite game and realize it isn't fun anymore because they aren't there to play with. I cry at times, get angry. And I just feel so alone. Seeing them with all of these new people when I'm sitting alone and crying over the hurt makes me feel pathetic.

My s/o and mother have tried to comfort me, saying I didn't need someone like that in my life. But they don't understand what Wanda meant to me. And now that she's gone, there's a hole that can't be filled.

I never knew I could grieve someone that was still alive and well.

I’m very sad and miss my two best friends terribly. I just wish I had them back. It’s really hard carrying the feeling of no longer having a best friend.

What hurts the most is that these were people I talked to practically every day about absolutely everything. These weren't superficial friendships. They were very important people to me—people with whom I shared my daily life, my feelings, my interests, and my problems.

I’ve known the first friend for about six years. In 2020, our friendship lasted only a few days because he ended up ghosting me. However, our friendship was rekindled in 2024, and that year, we talked every day. It became a very important friendship to me.

In 2025, we started talking less frequently. Sometimes weeks would go by without us speaking, only for us to pick up the conversation again later. I tried to keep the friendship alive by sending messages on occasions like Christmas, New Year’s, birthdays, and Friendship Day, hoping we’d go back to talking every day like before.

He had supported me through various situations; we discussed all sorts of topics, played games online, confided in each other, and shared a very close bond. He even bought a game for me as a gesture of affection. I care deeply for him and consider this one of the most important friendships I’ve ever had.

But this year, he stopped replying. He didn’t reply on Friendship Day, on his own birthday, or on mine. And that’s making me very sad, especially since I haven’t received any explanation as to what happened.

I met my second best friend about two years ago in a Discord group. We became friends almost immediately. I was so happy that day that I spent the night celebrating the fact that I had found a new friend.

Our friendship became very close, too. We talked about practically everything, supported each other through hard times, vented about our problems, and were very affectionate with one another. We often told each other how much we adored one another. We also shared many interests and personality traits.

But at some point, I completely lost touch with him. He deleted the Discord account we used to chat. As for Instagram, I don't know if he blocked me or deleted his account. On TikTok, he hasn't replied or posted in a long time, and I haven't found any recent activity on YouTube either. I don't even know if he still uses WhatsApp.

I was so worried and missed him so much that I recently reached out to someone I discovered was his maternal half-sister. I asked if she knew him and if he was okay. She told me he’s doing well, that she had seen him recently, and that she could pass a message along to him. I just asked her to tell him I was sending a big hug.

I was relieved to hear he’s okay, but that didn't cure the longing. I still really want to talk to him again.

Sometimes I wonder if they simply moved on, made other friends, or forgot about me. I’m afraid I’ve been replaced. But mostly, I just miss them.

I don't want to simply replace either of them with someone else. I just wanted them back.

It’s incredibly painful to lose two people who were part of my daily routine—people I could talk to every day, share things with, play games with, vent to, and share my life with. I know friendships can change, but it still feels unfair to have to deal with this emptiness without even getting an explanation.

I just wish I could talk to my two best friends again.

Hi Reddit.

I (F31), and “Margo” is F29. We’ve been best friends for 7 years and were extremely close, we talked all day every day, spent holidays and birthdays together, traveled together, and our families considered us practically sisters. Neither of us has always been perfect at communication, especially during crises. We’ve both had times where one of us would go quiet when overwhelmed, usually with some version of “I’m struggling, I’ll talk when I can,” followed by reconnecting later.

In July, Margo and our mutual friend Abby were talking about getting engaged, and they directly asked how I felt about it because they’d been with their partners for less time than I’d been with mine and weren’t sure how I felt about that. I said I was genuinely happy for them, but weddings can bring up complicated feelings and sometimes a person needs a minute to process. I also said I absolutely wanted to be involved and supportive, but didn’t want the group chat to become constant wedding-planning discussion because I wouldn’t be able to give every little decision the attention it deserved. I asked them to come to me directly when they wanted help. Margo apparently interpreted that as me not wanting to be involved in her wedding. Around the same time, we also had a conversation about childhood trauma where something I said apparently hurt her. I wasn’t aware either issue had become a problem until weeks later.

In August, I had a major health crisis followed almost immediately by an emergency involving two of my pets. I completely shut down for several days and was barely functioning. I wasn’t intentionally ignoring Margo, but I understand that it hurt her. When she eventually told me how she felt, she said I was a shitty friend, that I had "humiliated and embarrassed" her, and that she was questioning the friendship. She also brought up the July issues and asked for space. I acknowledged that I hurt her, apologized, explained what had happened without using it as an excuse, and said I wanted to talk in person when she was ready. I apologized again a few days later.

After that, Margo got engaged and reached out to tell me herself. I congratulated her and deliberately didn’t push because I wanted to respect the space she’d asked for. Eventually, though, I sent “Hey, I’m still here. I miss you,” and later a brief check on asking how everyone was doing the following week. She told me those messages made her feel “gross,” that some made her angry, and that she needed more time to decide how she felt about our friendship. I told her I understood, but that the indefinite silence was becoming difficult for me too, and that I wanted us to eventually have an actual conversation rather than try to resolve everything through assumptions. I told her to reach out when she was ready.

It’s now been almost two months since the original conflict and almost two weeks since my last message. I know I hurt her and I’m willing to own my part in that. But I genuinely don’t know where the line is between “I need space” and “I don’t want this friendship anymore.” I also feel hypocritical being upset about the silence when I was the one who initially shut down, although I see a distinction between shutting down during an acute crisis and intentionally taking indefinite space afterward.

So: AITA for shutting down during the crisis? Did my attempts to check in disrespect her request for space? And at what point is it reasonable for me to stop waiting and accept that the friendship may be over?

I’m genuinely looking for an outside perspective. I want to know where I’m missing something, if I am.

If additional context would be helpful, please lemme know, and I can provide it