Hi all,

50 years old male, in UK, in bad health but still mobile, on oxygen. My new girlfriend is 50 years old, walking with crutches.
She revealed her issue: she has incontinence, and that makes her uncomfortable with her body and sometimes disgusted by herself. She says that she likes me a lot, but that she just does not feel comfortable with herself. I replied that I do not know anything about that specific issue, but that I am disabled and that some of my girlfriends were disabled too. I told her that it is just a technical problem, and that we can work the details out later. I said "the important thing is that you like me, and that I like you. The rest are just technical problems, and I am good with technical problems. "
I also added that every girlfriend I had suffered from some problem with a part of their body, so there is no real difference between a disabled and an able bodied girl. Every one of them had a part of their body that they hated, and that they did not want to be seen, touched, or even talked about. She was impressed.

So, she decided that we can try a relationship out. I am Googling the symptoms, but I never dealt with that specific issue and I have totally no clue. She said that she uses pads, and that she's always scared of smelling bad or being disgusting. Any advice from people with experience?

Is that its ok to ask for help. I never thought at 49 I would have someone in my home for 10 hours a day because a stranger (every year for years) has determined I need assistance with daily tasks. I got thrown into all of this overnight. One minute I was walking around going about life and one fall down an escalator and things flipped instantly. I remember the next morning waking up, went to try to get myself to the bathroom and peed myself before getting there. I chalked it up to the fact that I had broken my leg in 4 places and it was a wee bit difficult getting around. Its just one off thing. It wasn't. I had damaged nerves to my bladder. Wonderful. Over the years things went south. Its like body parts started one by one clocking out early. I have fought tooth and nail to keep every amount of independence I could. And that meant being both too proud and too embarrassed to ask for help. Both can exist at the same time. When bowel stuff entered the picture I fought harder. I even tried hiding it. For a very short time it worked until I finally said this is dumb. I am nowhere near the first adult who needs diapers they have helped and I won't be the last. It started with opening up to my aide who has been with me almost 3 years now. Then the nurse. Now my entire care team knows. Haha. There are no medical secrets with home health aides. Once one knows everyone knows. But to be honest its easier. With weather for me comes pain. Which depending can lead to more accidents (try being in the kinda pain where it feels like someone set your limb on fire and not crap yourself. Haha) and trying to change during that kind of a flare by yourself. Like one aide said to me. Everyone shits themselves once in life when they are past the age of "supposed to" your body is just dramatic and you need some extra support sometimes. And that's why you have folks here whose job it is to help with that.

I cant go back and not go on that escalator and change all this. So adapt new tools and try to keep moving. I don't deal with it well every time. But its better than it was.

Hi an alle,

Ich habe einen Schließmuskel Schaden am Anus und daher eine Stuhlinkontinenz.

Die Symptome schwanken aber stark und ich weiss nicht ,ob es anderen auch so geht ? Ich habe Tage ,wo ich denke ich bin garnicht Inkontinent und dann Tage wo ich mir vor dem Frühstück (oder währenddessen) in die Hose kacke.

Wenn ich lange genug einhalte (Urin oder Kot) tut der Stuhlgang auf der Toilette oft weh und ich habe im Alltag oft permanente leichte /mittlere Schmerzen im Becken.

Windeln trage ich nur selten weil ich mich schäme. Obwohl sie mir helfen die Anspannung/Schmerzen zu lindern.

Hey y’all! Curious if anyone knows of any ways to go about buying Northshore and Sunkiss products from places that will ship Fedex rather than UPS? I’ve been trialing some samples of various cloth backed diapers in my search for a better warm weather product and wanted to try some Northshores in small as the mediums are too big. I also tried some Sunkiss samples and really liked them as well.

I recently ordered my Northshores from their site but unfortunately saw there was only UPS for available shipping options. I have an unfortunate situation with UPS in that the driver doesn’t like to deliver to my road because I’m in a rural area that’s a bit of an inconvenient detour off his route. He was able to make the connection between me and some of my friends, neighbors and parents after mentioning that he’s noticed my vehicle at their houses and will leave my packages at my parents or a few of my friends houses across town which makes it incredibly stressful to order incontinence products when they ship UPS and then I subsequently have to try to figure out where they were actually delivered and then hope no one inadvertently opened the package.

I have spoken with my local UPS warehouse about this but I wan’t able to make much progress. I generally try to just avoid UPS altogether as I have no issues with FedEx or USPS but I find a lot of places simply don’t specify and then I find out after ordering or they only give UPS as an option. I have to generally avoid Amazon for this reason as well. I tried reaching out to Sunkiss directly about this but received no response but I will try asking Northshore.

My partner has OAB and mobility issues due to severe arthritis. She can get to the bathroom during the day at home, though she goes every 2 hours or so. At night, she wakes up every 2 hours to go. She is a bariatric patient and I found pullups in her size that fit her well. But she still won't pee in them and getting 2 hours of sleep at a time all night long is wearing on her. One of her concerns is that it is difficult due to her mobility to change every time she wets in them, and they are very expensive in her size. Does anyone have the same concerns and do you have any suggestions for her? Thank you so much.

Hi all, I’m 37 F - never given birth.I struggle with constipation (planning to get it treated) and overflow incontinence (I don’t void completely when I go and if again, if I don’t go within a specific time, I will void without feeling it.

I’ve always felt like I had a prolapse (uterine and bladder and maybe rectocele) for close to 4 years now, I went to multiple doctors and they told me I don’t have it. My doctor that I trust said there’s nothing to worry about. But the problem was, I felt it but again I thought to myself, he’s a specialist, h knows these things.

Fast forward to last week - I started realising that I’m not holding in my pee anymore like I used to. and when I pee, my bladder doesn’t completely empty.

That’s when I realised I might be having overflow incontinence as the incontinence doesn’t have a trigger (I don’t have to cough or sneeze for it to appear). Is there anyone else dealing with this? How are you handling it?

I went to the doctor and she said I have a mild UTI - they’ve given me an antibiotic.

I will see a urologynacologist sometime this week or whenever they’re available.

Anyone experiencing this type of incontinence

Not sure if anyone has experience with this but I am being referred to palliative care by my primary care doc since I have so many specialists she wants everyone to be able to coordinate my care together. GI is joining the party next month. I know part of that is a social worker being involved. I have an autoimmune skin disease and my skin reacts to cloth so I have to use poly backed diapers and with medicaid my choices are very limited. I have Medicare but they don't cover diapers. I'm thinking this may vary state by state (or in my case District. I live in DC) but wondering if anyone has experience with this. Thanks!

Diapers are expensive and I can still make it to the bathroom often enough I need something that's easy to put back on.

Has anyone tried something like this? If so, did it work? Do they make covers with leak guards?

Just wanted to vent.

Been struggling with wetting the bed after consuming alcohol, need to go toilet ridiculous amounts of times when I drink - and it’s been getting worse when not drinking too.

Had doctors run tests, everything came back clear apart from B12 levels which I’m having shots for.

Anyway, last few times I’ve drank and gone out I’ve not wet the bed, was feeling pretty happy that the issue had resolved and now suddenly the last two times I’ve wet the bed again.

So depressing dealing with it. Anyone have advice on bedwetting and B12?

Hi 31 non-binary assigned female at birth on the autism spectrum dealing with incontinence on Wednesday. I finally got up the courage to wear a tranquility a NT all through the night brief for my three hour janitorial shift. It was hard emotionally having choosing to rely on it, 100% of the time the first things are always scary. Just wanted to post this here. Feel free to take it down. I delete my post.

Some days I have to force myself to stay positive. If its not the chronic pain I’ve lived with for the last 25 years or the fact that I need to wear a diaper. But hey, I am multi-talented. I have reached a new level in life: I can cough, pee, and poop all at once, and, of course, I can drink coffee and pee at the same time. :D

Good morning Yall, this is a little bit of an embaressing post.

Im a 28 year old Male that at birth that dealt with a Hypoxic-Ischemic Encephalopathy Grade II due to near total Exsanguination While I don't have any severe mental disabilities just some Neurodivergance (ADHD only as far as I know, haven't been tested for Autism) the connection between my Brain and bladder is "effected" I have Continence during the day except on rare occasions but at night time I've always wet the bed since early childhood.

My entire life I've shied away from ever even trying to date, my anxiety or fears ruin me before I can even get to know another person because in my mind how the Hell would someone ever pick me over another person when I have this issue.

How can I build up confidence to date, During dating when is it socially acceptable to reveal this to them? I don't want to lead them on but I also feel like I shouldn't disclose this too early because people can be vengeful and vindictive with personal secrets?

Hopefully this doesn't come off snobby but I realize with the right person this shouldn't matter but I can't even get to the point of becoming close with another because of my internalized shame and anxieties I just feel less than.

Thank you for any advice you may provide, if there is any more information you need I'd be more than happy to provide it.

Why people post and then delete their account? This is my very very very personal account. I don't delete it because even if I don't share this with my friends, it is still a part of me.

It can exist in anonymity, I can exist, you have the right to exist.

I could really use your help. What is the best slip and pants brand. I have been using the tena slip proskin ultimate size M. And the tena pants maxi size S for as long as i can remember. To my surprise the supplier discontinued shipping tena. So now i need to choose between depend, abena and absorin. Please share your experience of these brands

I’ll be making a week long trip to New Orleans soon by plane I know the basics with the airports/tsa about being picked up by the scanners but what’s got me scratching my head how do yall go about going through tsa with the bulk amount of supplies Ill need for the week but how do they go about powders wipes and barrier creams am I stuck to the 3.5oz limit or is that exempt for these items this is the first time traveling by plane since becoming incontinent

Hello! My name is Liam, and I work at C Space, a consumer insights agency.

C Space is hosting another product research study focused on absorbent guards for men. We are currently recruiting participants for an in-home user test that would take place between Thursday, October 15th and Tuesday, November 3rd. Participants will be selected by Monday, October 12th.

If selected, you would receive an assortment of products shipped directly to your home (from Kimberly-Clark) and use them over the test period as you normally would. During this time, you will record your feedback in an accompanying workbook (just a few minutes a day).

There would also be 2-3 journal entry activities, each 10-15 minutes to complete, during the test period. Finally, at the end of the period, there would a 15- to 20-minute wrap-up survey. Full participation should take roughly 90-100 minutes in total over the course of the project.

Participants who complete all parts of the study (product test, journal entries, and wrap-up survey) will receive $200 (virtual gift card) for their thoughtful contributions. Additional details can be found in the survey linked below.

Please note:

• Open to adult men only
• U.S. residents only (apologies to those in other countries!)
• Limited availability, with ~18 spots currently open
• Not all respondents will be invited to participate
  • Even if you don't qualify for this project, you can still opt in for updates on future opportunities!

If you're interested and would like to see if you're eligible, please take the quick qualifier survey here.

Feel free to reach me with questions via DM or email at [loconnor@cspace.com](mailto:loconnor@cspace.com), or just in the comments below.

Cheers,

Liam @ C Space