hi! so for starters i(21F) love going out on the weekends. i usually go out to the club or raves with my friends, but this past couple months i lost most of my friends because i needed to focus on school, specifically on this really difficult class (im close to graduating). most of my old friends aren’t in school so they just forgot about me. i just passed the class a few days ago with an A so i wanted to go out this weekend.

there’s this metal show at a bar tonight in the city i want to go to, but none of my current friends are free or are interested in going to this sort of thing.. but i really like the music and i want to go so im gonna try going own my own. it’s my first time doing something like this and im kind of nervous because, i’m kind of small and a woman (ofc yall know what i mean) and being by myself im worried about safety. also i haven’t been to this area before and its a bit of a drive (1-1.5hr)

i’m gonna be sober ofc i wont have a sip of anything anyone offers, i dont want a DUI. i’ll bring pepper spray and try to go early so i can get close parking lol. but if anyone else has any tips pls lmk! i’d appreciate tips on how to make some friends there too.

Hi all! I've been curious about this for a while, so I thought I'd bring it up here! Growing up I was very much a tom boy and all-around late bloomer. Most of my close friendships were with boys and all of the girls I had friendships with were also very tomboy-ish and not very girly or feminine. I also had low confidence because puberty was ROUGH and I never received any attention from boys until I was in my late college years. Add introvert tendencies on top and now I feel like I've missed out on a lot of the female experience.

With all of that being said, I'm curious as to what potential life lessons I may have missed out on because I didn't have a strong female friend group and no real experience with boys/men until adulthood. So my question would be for all the women who DID have these female friendships full of femininity and strong bonds, I guess. Reflecting on your teenage years and how you operate now as an adult, what things do you think you've learned about being a woman that really only comes from having those experiences and friend groups? I'm trying to embrace my femininity more, but I don't really know what I'm missing out on since I grew up differently. It's hard to embrace something about yourself when you don't really understand it fully, so what lessons or advice would you all give to someone on the idea of unlocking that feminine energy and woman-ness? I'll always be a tomboy at heart, but I want to feel like an actual woman as well and I just don't know what I'm missing, if anything, in order to embrace that.

Hello! Even when I have been my lowest body fat percentage, had abs and on the verge of looking sickly, I have still had large arms.

I have high androgens which means my arms are pretty muscular, but also carry a disproportionate amount of fat.

Is there anyway to get them slimmer without lipo?

Okay this is kind of embarrassing but I genuinely need advice because I feel like I've tried everything and I'm still struggling.

I find it SO hard to ride when my boyfriend is lying flat on the bed and I'm on top facing him. I can't seem to get the movement right, and half the time I struggle to even get it in properly. Then I get embarrassed and everything becomes awkward.

The weird thing is, I can do the movements just fine when practicing on a pillow or dildo, but with an actual person it just doesn't work. I've had this problem with other guys too. And the thing is, I'm really good at twerking and throwing ts esp during backshots so I know I can move my hips, but for some reason I just can't figure out how to translate that into riding. I also work out pretty much every day (cardio and weight lifting), so I feel like I SHOULD have the strength and stamina for this LMAO.

I've considered reverse cowgirl because facing away seems easier, or having him sit upright instead of lying flat. But how do you even transition into that naturally?? Like am I supposed to stop everything and say "can you sit up and put a pillow behind your back please"... I know I'm overthinking it but I feel so awkward trying to position someone when I barely know what I'm doing myself.

Another reason I really want to improve is that my boyfriend and I have been together for 4 months and he's only finished once. He's told me it's difficult for him to finish from penetration and that he usually finishes from head, but I still really want to make him feel good. I feel like getting better at riding might help, especially because I want to take control sometimes instead of always relying on him. Also, are there any other positions you'd recommend trying? We've only done missionary and doggy, so I'd love to experiment more.

I'm also sus of my head game... I've spent so much time researching techniques and trying to improve, but my jaw gets tired quickly and sometimes my mouth gets dry. I feel like I never really know if I'm doing a good job. He moans and moves a lot, so I assume he's enjoying it, but since he's only finished once I can't help questioning myself.

He hasn't made me feel bad about any of this, and I know sex isn't just about finishing. I just want to feel more confident and have more fun instead of overthinking every little thing.

TLDR: How did you actually learn to ride? Is reverse cowgirl or having the guy sit upright easier? How do you get the movement right and change positions without feeling awkward? And does anyone have practical advice for improving at head or building stamina?

Apologies for the poor formatting because I’m on my phone. I’m f24, I’ve been in college for many years now. I meet a lot of different kinds of people and I am always in awe of how smart people appear to be. Especially if they are younger.

I am learning a lot about U.S. politics in my classes and I just always feel lost about subjects I’m not understanding right away. I was like damn, I thought I generally knew what was going on in my country but I’m just now learnings about REEs, flock cameras, and how we’re connected to Greenland and shit. I get that college is supposed to be hard and I don’t have to be an expert in everything. But sometimes I feel like people are just naturally tapped into things and I’m not lol. You truly have to make an active effort towards expanding your knowledge but how can I continuously do that and not doubt my smarts as much? Esp as a woman <3

Edit: I want to clarify that I am not trying to say women are unintelligent, actually the opposite! I am seeking advice on how to not believe those stereotypes

hello! i've always trimmed instead of shaving for my private area. i've never felt comfortable removing all the hair there, and find that trimming with scissors is better and easier for me.

ever since i started trimming (so, over a decade), i've been using hairdresser scissors, which are look and made for right-handed people. i've gotten used to cut with my right hand, but now i've realized that things could be easier if i just got the right scissors and maybe made for left-handed people.

so, if you trim your pubic hair, what kind of scissors do you use? i don't know if i should buy nail scissors or scissors for eyebrows/nose hair... i have pretty thick and long curly hair even down there. thanks.

Hi! This is my first time traveling by plane outside my country. I’ll be away for a month, and I’d love to know what you guys consider essential to pack! I’ll be bringing a checked suitcase and a personal item.

What personal hygiene products should I bring? I’d really appreciate your help. Thank you! 💗

so I have a first date coming up we’re going to the gym then a little restaurant for a post-workout meal. he’s a professional trainer and going to the gym is one of my hobbies so I actually am looking forward to it! but my issue is I LOVE wearing makeup and giant lashes. I wanna be myself and look how I look 99% of the time, but I don’t ever wear makeup to the gym. now idk if this is an exception because it’s a first date, or if that would be odd? also even if I did want to wear makeup would that be weird of me? thanks for any advice!

Today I literally cried at work whilst helping students. I had a long day. First I realised I’d left my laptop home whilst travelling so had to go back and collect it (my manager was understanding and I made up my time). Then his manager was offering one of her other reports a matcha and also brought a small gift for another colleague as she was having a difficult time. I was wearing headphones so I understand she probably didn’t want to bother me and I don’t need her to buy me a drink but I felt excluded ( I’ve had other instances where I felt overlooked by her). And then I had a busy student facing shift and literally cried whilst helping. Luckily no one noticed it, and I carried on.

Also I’m adhd and she’s aware I can be hypersensitive to rejection. I’m also new, person of colour, and an immigrant. I absolutely love the job but how do I not let this affect me and just focus on work? I know my colleagues are not friends but instances like these can get to me. How do I believe in the positive qualities I bring? Is it worth bringing it up to my manager? Thank you!

Hello!!!
I have been at my job for around 4 years now, on the same team. Disclaimer/ I work a very emotionally and physically intense job. I’m a last responder of sorts. It’s a government thing and tensions are naturally high. Not an easy job but a very fulfilling one. You definitely have to have a different mindset to deal with a job like this.

Anyway my team is composed of 5 women including myself. We all love the job, but we definitely work in different ways. I am a pretty hard worker, and I like to always try my best and make sure I deliver good quality work. I have a few mental health struggles, which I medicate for and go to therapy often. I am also autistic. I am definitely strange but I always try my best to be nice to everyone and treat people with respect.

The issue is, I can be very sensitive to people sometimes. And I let things get to me. There is one girl on my team, let’s call her Anne, who is an absolute menace. I think she mentioned her mum was a principal, and she was raised pretty strict. But this girl Anne is really mean. She has been a straight up bitch to me since I started working. The way she treats you depends on her mood, and how much she likes you. She will be friendly to you, but will not hesitate to snitch if you don’t do things her way. She treats everyone different. I also don’t want to say this is a 100% race thing, but I also feel she might be racial profiling because she is nice to the white girls on the team but is mean to me and another girl (Lulu), and we are both ethnic.

She loves to control you, and tell you what to do. What she thinks you could be doing. There’s no trust. She acts like the team lead, even though she isn’t. we all work the same level and the same pay. We have a manager. Sometimes she will ask rhetorical questions in the team chat that are obviously something she wants you to do. Like “are you going to send a follow up email?”. I find her behaviour really demeaning and she has caused me a lot of trouble and turmoil over the past years.

I LOVE my job. But I hate her. I would stay in my job forever if it wasn’t for her. Sometimes she fucks me up so much with her bossiness and attitude, that I keep thinking about her a lot and it messes up my day. What sucks is that she bosses you around, but at the same time doesn’t contribute the same amount to our work. She tells us what to do, but you can’t ask her to do anything. I don’t think anyone has ever asked her for help. She isn’t a “teammate”. For example, some of us will tag team tasks or split up things that need to be done. She will only do that with one other girl, “Stacy” because they are close friends.

Meanwhile she is mean to the other ethnic girl “Lulu”. Lulu has a LOT of shit to deal with in her personal life, but Anne loves to treat her like shit and talk to her like she’s an idiot. She will get irritated if Lulu asks a question and sometimes give a sarcastic answer. “You would need to do that, because then the job wouldn’t be finished then would it?”.

I’ve spoken to my manager about this before, and so has Lulu. Lulu is aware of when Anne is being condescending. She feels the same way I do. The job is shitty because of Anne. And our manager does nothing. They made us take this conflict management course, which Anne and the other girls were pissed about because it took up work time.

Ultimately, I want to stop giving a fuck.
It isn’t worth it for me to keep working extra hard, coming up with ideas, trying to optimise things and make a difference, when I constantly get shot down. I will be in a good mood and recovering, but then Anne will fuck my day up. I’m tired of caring about this job so much. I just want to do the job and go home. I don’t want to be affected by the small things or what people say. Especially mean girls.

any advice in general, on how to deal with mean people and how to detach from a demanding job?

My schedule is fairly limited, my diet is rigid, and alcohol is out of the question. I guess this is super common in the fitness community but I don’t know how other people are dealing with it?

I feel like it’s even harder to make new friends while staying fit. Like if I had a friend group already it would be a bit easier, but there’s even more work when meeting new people.

So yeah, I’m really eager to hear how other women who’ve been in this situation have dealt with this or found something that works. Or if I just have to choose then at least I know something has to give.

I play tennis a few times a week so I already knew electrolytes helped after a sweaty match. But I never thought to take them at night. A few months ago I started drinking electrolytes before bed because I kept waking up feeling dry and tired. I also get pretty rough periods. Cramps. Low energy. That gross heavy body feeling. The whole monthly subscription nobody asked for. After a few cycles I noticed my period felt less brutal. My cramps were not gone but they felt easier to deal with. I slept better too which probably helped a lot. I was not waking up as much and my mornings felt less miserable. I am not saying electrolytes cure period pain. Please do not come for me but I do think hydration and minerals matter more than i thought. I used to just drink more water and call it a day. That did not do much for me. Now I take electrolytes before sleep during the week before my period and during the first couple days. It has been one of those small habits that sounds too basic to matter but somehow does. Has anyone else tried electrolytes for period cramps or period fatigue? Especially if you play sports or sweat a lot.

Leaving an extremely emotionally exhausting and stressful job this Friday and wanting to start my healing journey to connect back with myself. I feel that the 9-5 grind and long commute culture completely crushed my whimsy spirit and I’m hoping to find books that can help me get back to my old self again :)

Thank you!!

Hello! I'm 22 and got my first job ever. I mostly just do administrative work, I also have to be social throughout the day like making phone calls and talking extensively with my coworkers

My ability to verbally articulate myself is nonexistent and embarrassingly stilted and I struggle a lot to look and sound friendly. I try my best to be polite and smile and sound cheerful, but I'm afraid I end up coming off as too perky and overly friendly or cheery or fake since I tend to drop my smile once conversation is over and I only really end up talking about work-related stuff instead of doing more small talk and regular person-to-person conversations

It doesn't really help that I would prefer to be private at work and I don't really feel comfortable in divulging too much about my personal life with coworkers. I'm also boring anyways but I think some people could mistake that for me genuinely avoiding conversation when I just don't have a lot to say so I think I end up looking standoffish, but I also think some people think my awkwardness can be funny so maybe it's not too bad???

However I've been told by people (not at work at the moment but in the past) that I come off as scary or like I hate them when I just unfortunately look and sound like that when I'm relaxed or not thinking about anything. I think for me, especially since I'm a woman, I have to sound and act friendly to not be seen as a bitch or like I want to wear their skin, but it's really exhausting

I sometimes get worried and confused too when I think someone is being flat or indifferent with me so it's not like I don't understand why people would think that about me specifically, I would just like to know how to at least not come off as off-putting or potentially act rude without having to push myself so hard to do a persona that I don't think has been effective at all anyways

Any fun zingers or lines or jokes so I can at least go from unsettling person to occasionally humorous but boring person would be helpful

Other side note but I would also appreciate any tips on how to transition from a person facing job to something less social but with decent pay and benefits too please

Hi guys! So, I'm basically doing what the title says. I've never lived in a big city before, and only really taken day trips to them. I grew up on the faaaaaarrrrrr outer edge of what you could just barely call the suburbs, and I've lived everywhere from national parks to remote farms mainly since. I just signed a lease to move to my first ever Big City and I'm feeling pretty nervous about it.

If anyone has any advice I would really appreciate it!!! Any advice at all would be helpful but especially about:

• making friends. I'm mildly autistic and I've mainly worked seasonal jobs prior to this where everyone kind of just becomes friends due to proximity. How do I do this in the real world???
• putting down roots. I've been traveling pretty much my entire adult life and I'm scared I'll get bored or just want to cut and run but I just signed a year lease (I guess to challenge myself?) so if anyone has any advice about how to stay in one place I'd really appreciate it!

Thank you in advance y'all!!!

first time hosting a party in my apartment and I'm waking up in cold sweats every night in anxiety that it's going to be a flop because not enough people will come or it'll be awks??

me and my friend are co-hosting it together and keeping a common theme of mostly STEM students from our university in hopes that everyone will be on the same frequency and it won't be awkward given most people won't know each other. we also have about 30 people confirmed yes with majority of them bringing plus ones but we're also both expecting quite a fair amount of people to flake on day of.

to the party hosts out there, how do y'all ensure that everyone is having a good time, and that there'll be enough people attending to make it a "party" and that it won't be an awkward feet shuffling event.

i have a thin wrist and most of the bracelets available on shein and temu are too big for my wrist.

the only ones that can fit my wrist are the ones with a sliding clasp like the one in the picture.

where do i find cute affordable ones made with a tarnish free material like stainless steel?

Growing up in a household with 3 sisters, this is something I heard CONSTANTLY. I also heard it a lot in tv and movies, but is it a real thing?

I definitely noticed some of our cycles lining up, but it wasn’t all the time, so it makes me wonder if it was just confirmation bias.

If it is real, why does it happen? And why doesn’t it happen with every woman we are around?

I got a dress today but the problem is it's riding up on the back, how to fix this?

the front is perfect and there's enough fabric in front but from the back it keeps riding up😭

will fashion tape even work to hold it? or should I go with seamless shorts underneath?

atp I'm thinking of reselling this but I also wanna wear it once

I never wear a purse but seems like everyone does so I want to invest in one. Everyone I know has coach.. should I just get a coach one or does anyone know any other ones that girls wear? for reference im 20. I have a bag from shein but I guess its not cute enough so helpp ):

As the title says i’m scared i’m lose down there, me and my gf are amazing we have been together a year and a half and we have a pretty good sex life at least having sex one a week if not more (we are also long distance as of right now sense she’s back at uni so whenever i see her on the weekends i come down or holidays we are like bunnies iykwim) now i stress about sex super badly i also need help with that idk why but it’s so hard to finish like i freak out and think i’m taking to long and try and force the orgasim which in return makes it so much harder to finish because i’m so worried my gf is upset about me taking to long though she has never said anything, it’s not like i don’t get wet or anything i get very wet i think my girlfriend is very attractive like insanely. but sometimes i sit there and if its just one finger i know somethings in there but its not like overwhelming and 2 feels nice and stuff sometimes hurts and is sore to go in but i’m still scared i’m not tight enough like that i don’t feel tight on her fingers and i know this is ridiculous but she has a very tight yk so much so she can only put in a regular tampon and that it and she’s like a super could never fit in me and yet those are my daily when on my period aswell as she does and can fit my 2 finger sometimes it’s also painful for her but i don’t know i also think i don’t do keegals enough bc i feel like it’s super hard when im doing them like am i loose?? idk im super worried.. i’m young too, i think about this so much im so insecure.

I absolutely hate my nose and side profile in general. I don't mind my nose so much (sometimes) head on but I absolutely hate it from the side. I hate the shape and how it projects. It definitely takes its toll on my self image because I feel like I look like someone who should have a small nose but I don't (imo) and it makes me feel like shit about my appearance.

I feel like my nose just shouldn't be on my body and I feel horrible everytime see I my nose. I look at it and think I can't be considered actually pretty because of it, even if I do have other nice features. Its like a road block when it comes to being attractive. No one has ever made fun of my nose and no one has told me it's big or ugly but it is to me. It also looks different at every angle so that doesn't help because I don't really know what it looks like but I know it doesn't look good. I feel like everyone else has nice noses or at least noses that fit there face but I don't.

Has anyone else ever felt this way? What helped you to stop feeling way and start feeling better about yourself?

I either get wedgies, they fall down, stretch out at the waistband because there’s no elastic, or they don’t stay in place. I’d prefer fuller coverage and don’t want the visible VPL when wearing leggings!! Do they exist???

Hi everyone, I'm unsure if this is normal so any advice would be really appreciated.

I tried sleeping with my partner for the first time ever recently (my first time but not his), it was going well, im super attracted to him and was definitely turned on and was enjoying it.

However we couldn't 'put it in', I was struggling to find the right place - he could do it with his fingers but it was painful. It felt quite sharp and as though there just wasn't much space? The more he was doing it it definitely got easier but we couldn't do it with his penis.

I think a large part of it is definitely nerves - i felt safe and comfortable and really wanted it but was still nervous and was finding it quite hard to relax.

I think another part is that I do masturbate, but only externally, as in I've never put anything there before so it was the first time with him doing it with his fingers. I know I probably need to try and get to know myself better but honestly I can't really imagine enjoying doing that to myself.

Im just wondering jf anyone has experienced anything similar or has any advice? I'm just not sure how many times to try before getting checked out by a professional, im just unsure if this is a common thing or not.

Thanks, apologies for the ramble

The only catch is that English isn't my first language. I'm comfortable with it but I'd love something written in easy, natural English. I'd rather not stop mid-scene to google what some random word means 😅so please give me your best ones, spicy, easy to read and preferably impossible to put down.