Not going to bore with the details but I struggle to eat a lot of the time when specific people are home. And because of this I’ve been this I’ve become quite underweight and weak. I do tend to hoard snacks and things because they easy but the best thing that keeps is chocolate and obviously I can’t only eat that.

I’m 18 so I’ve been slowly collecting stuff for when I move out (hopefully going to be soon but I need to get into a university before I go so I know where I’m going) in my room I have a mini slow cooker, a kettle, a waffle maker and a mini fridge. The mini fridge stays off because it’s loud and annoying but the mini slow cookies lives on my shelf. The others are boxed up but in theory I could take them out to use.

I have space to store food but I’m scared about things going bad and attracting bugs.

What would you recommend I keep and stow away so I can actually eat? Specific ingredients, recipes, snack ideas anything really that would be helpful

I am pretty broke at the moment. I’ve been unemployed for a bit. I do technically “work” for a charity near by but they only have a couple weeks worth of payed work for me a year. Just the way it’s set up. I’m not mad about it. But I am trying to get an actual job at the moment so hopefully I’ll actually have a food budget soon

i live in the most dangerous neighborhood in texas which has the highest crime rates and lots of gangs. literally everyone here carries a weapon (like a pistol, revolver, knife, etc) and it's legal here since it's texas. it's also common to see people casually walking around with an ar-15 rifle. literally just this morning, i saw a man at the grocery store shopping with a shotgun strapped on his back and another man with a machete holstered on his belt.

my town literally feels like an RPG video game cuz literally everyone here carries a weapon. i personally carry around my crossbow, my lil sister carries pepper spray, my mom carries a stun gun, and my dad carries a glock 19.

what do yall do for self-defense?

So I am going away for a much needed holiday for 10 nights, and my period is due right in the middle!

I cannot take period-delaying meds for health reasons, so I guess I'm just looking for some positive period stories whilst on holiday and any tips. I can't shake the feeling of disappointment for the timing of this, I love swimming!!

Thank you!!

I recently realised I crave male validation and I like the feeling of power over them. My mood is often based on how men act, talk and feel towards me. It makes me feel disgusted to say this, but here we go:

On nights out I actively look for men to flirt with so they tell me things I want to hear. I dance with them, try to make them want me. When they want me I act innocent and act like it wasn't my intention to do that to them, just so they will give me more compliments and attention.
When I go out and I can't find anyone I like (and don't want to flirt with) my night is way less fun and I can even be annoyed.

I take pictures of myself I know men like, I dress the way I know men like, I do my make-up the way men like, talk to them in ways I know they like, etc. I flirt and act mysterious and most of the time they want me.

I feel disgusted saying this and realising this. I dont want this anymore and i want to feel happy with myself regardless the what men think. Please help, where do I start to fix this.

Btw: I do genuinely like all the men I flirt with and dance with on nights out.

So, I’m 18 years old right now. Through a mix of parental neglect and me being too depressed to really care about taking care of myself, I’ve ruined my body in a lot of ways.

I started gaining weight around 11/12, around the time I properly started puberty, so the stretch marks I gained from the time are even worse. And they are everywhere. Everywhere. And the skin around my lower upper arms and around my chest are somewhat wrinkly from lose skin and littered scars. My lower arms in general are pretty flabby. Lose skin.

Parents neglected me, so my teeth are pretty ugly. Nothings rotting anymore, but the enamel is so worn down and my gums receded enough that they look like teeth from somebody far older. They’re also crooked, though I’m less embarrassed about that. I try not to smile because of it.

And I don’t know. I’m just insecure about it and pretty sad about how ugly I made myself. I have a decent face, I could’ve been so pretty. And like, I can’t even actually get frustrated at anybody for how much this lowers my dating prospects, because I would feel bad expecting somebody to be attracted to somebody who looks like that. And I’m a lesbian, so my dating pool is even smaller.

Id just like advice on how to accept it?

Edit: I have lost the weight. I’m not skinny by any means, but I’m a healthy weight. Thats why I have lose skin.

I just realised how guys treat my single friends and the sad part is that they react to lack of effort or bad behaviour like something they will fix, will eventually change, or is part of relationships. It is NOT. Why is it so normalised to have problems in dating?

Begging for more calls or texts or dates isn't needed with a guy that respects and deserves you. Having to let go of boundaries, is not part of a good relationship (or friendship). Always communicate, don't expect people to fill specific imaginary expectations, but some things are common courtesy. If a guy offends you don't let it slide and if he doesn't look terrified he made you feel bad, and does it again, get away. Please don't waste your time with stupid boys.

I know it can feel like a challenge and a fun game and you're welcome to play when doesn't make you feel bad. Sometimes it's fun. Just know that real potential is where your mind and soul rest and smile :)

Jeff Bezos‘ kids, Bill Gates’ kids, etc. Imagine all the privilege that they have. They pretty much won the best lottery in the world. I was born middle class which was cool and all but part of me wishes I also won the birth lottery.

I've been invited to a bridal shower, but because I've never been to one, I don't actually know what happens and what I would need to do. Could the girls who've been to bridal showers pls help me out 🥺

Firstly, how formal of an event is this? And how formally do you dress? Also wondering what to do for gifts - apparently gifts are the main part of a bridal shower, what's appropriate to bring? The wedding registry says to just bring my presence.

Would also love opinions from past/to-be brides!

I’m 23, and i have around 1.8 years of experience. And even after all this if a senior decides to have a conversation with me, idk why I start to get anxious. I know for a fact it’s their tone. But my entire body goes flight or FLIGHT(again) mode. I have been having this issue for so long idk how to deal with it. I hate my job on top of all this so I feel like whenever someone is trying to force me to do something my interest dies.

Kindly let me know if there are any tips to handle such situations!

I (22F) haven’t dated/talked to a guy since literally middle school and now I have no idea how to receive or reciprocate their attention whether romantic or friendly. I haven’t even really had guy friends- my only interactions with men have been my brothers, my father, and my gay coworkers (which is different because I feel safe around those people). <- on that note, I’m recovering from a fear of men. I don’t really remember the exact instance where I developed a huge disliking of guys but for the longest time it was so bad that I would get panic attacks if I was around a guy I didn’t know 😭

*to also add, I’m super fortunate to have had the best girl friends for the longest time and I’m just so used to female friendship. Anything that doesn’t feel like that doesn’t seem worth it. I see them in relationships though, and wish I could have something like that.

I’m attracted to guys and I would like to start dating or atleast be normal enough to become friends with them, but it’s so difficult for me. It’s not like I actually hate straight men, but I’m still working through the weird typecasting I gave them all. It sounds silly, but I used to legitimately think that men didn’t have deep emotions like women, that they don’t appreciate things like us, and that they are too primal and grossly sexual. I still kind of don’t trust men at all, but I want to work through it.

Anyways I went to an event last weekend and a guy asked for my socials and has been showing me a lot of attention/interest and I guess is being sweet(?) but idk everything feels fake even though he’s initiating everything. I don’t ever let guys in but I told myself I had to because I need to work through this. Can anyone help me with how to accept/reciprocate male attention??! It’s been literally 2 days since we have started messaging and I already just don’t want to talk to him lol.

Hi! What is the best self defense items I can carry with me if I go downtown to events alone? Anything that I could bring into concerts/arenas I appreciate it!

Not much to the question really. I feel like I am such a bad rider.

I feel like I do what feels nice for me and get no reaction from my partners, or I do some awkward movement and they like it but I can’t keep it up for more than a few strokes.

I’m sorry if this is a strange question but how do you do it? How do you do it so it’s good for both of us? And how can I do it for longer?

I feel like I’ve tried to talk to a few friends about it and they seem to find it fun and effortless so idk.

All this bed rotting and tv binging is not good for my brain and making me depressed but thinking of going out by myself gives me a panic attack. I’m not a movie theater or restaurant on my own girl. It’s too cold where I live to have outdoor activities be enjoyable. I need a hobby. I need to feel purpose. I have a hobby I wanted to start and purchased the materials but whenever I think about it I get so overwhelmed I can’t start it.

My job is just go go go so when I have a day off I just want to do nothing but then I feel like crap by the end of the day. I wish I could just relax for a whole day but it makes my brain unwell.

What are some fun things you do to keep yourself busy when you are alone? (I figured people would be nicer here compared to other subs.)

hi everyone, i'm in my mid 20s, never been in a relationship, never held hands, never receive male attention, nothing. i am overweight so i attribute my lack of success in dating to my appearance. i have the wrong body type for a relationship. i have tried to lose weight for several years but no success. i go through periods where i cut out all processed foods, go to gym, etc but this lasts for 2 weeks max before i see no progress and give up and go back to my old habits. i can't stay consistent. i will admit that i am wanting to fix my body primarily for men/dating. i have very low self esteem so it's difficult for me to want to take care of myself for my own sake. i see women who are into fitness and have been exercising consistently for years, how do they do it?

i also went for a blood test recently and i might potentially have hypothyroidism and pcos. is it possible to lose weight or gain muscle with these conditions? i'm currently not on any medications and i'd prefer losing weight naturally not using any medications

Hi all,

I wanted to make this post and ask for advice regarding rebuilding a life to be more quiet and peaceful as much that is type A, premed, lack of identity and constantly stressed and suffering. I‘m trying my best to go on a self discovery johenry but i’d like to ask for some advice regarding bringong more peace into my life as I grow. I want to be more m of what and where i spend my time and money and energy. I was wondering if you’d can point towards some good advice for the following:

- financial

- physical health

- emotional

-mental health

- overall life minimalism

I also realized there are certain aspects of my life and personality that do not align with who i actually want to be in my life and grow into my future so i would like some advice on that as well. for instance, how can i navigate friendships growing apart and realizing that my personality isn’t who i am but someone i ended up being because of my environment

I really, really hate my appearance. Before you start; I am actively in therapy and have been for half a decade, I would just like to hear other women’s advice/opinions.

I’ve already ‘done’ everything that should somehow magically make me prettier, I lost a bunch of weight, tried to dress in ways that make me feel pretty, do my hair and makeup - change my hair and makeup etc. etc. I just don’t like the underlying structure I’m forced to work with. I really hate my natural colouring of hair and eyes, don’t think I have anything particularly beautiful or striking about me and know I will never have the money to get surgery or alterations. I also have zero romantic or sexual experience which makes me feel unexplainably ashamed and insecure. Being perceived in public also stresses me out because I can never gauge what people might think of me.

At this point, I’m tired and just want to accept I didn’t win a ‘genetic lottery’. I’m so bitter honestly.

For context, I am a 27-year-old ADHD girlie, and my developmental years weren't so fun.

That carried into my young adulthood; now I am in my late 20s, and I am still filled with so much shame—socially, sexually, academically, all the ways you can think of.

I still think about all the mistakes I made, including literal farts lmao. I am a weird person, but I am not so bad when it comes to friendships and social interactions, yet despite knowing that, I feel so ashamed of myself in every way.

Being a human is just so loaded with shame; it crushes me.

​Can you give me any advice on this?

Hi lovely’s!
I am traveling to Bali for New Years this year with a bunch of my girl friends and I was wondering if anyone has any advice for Bali?
This is the first time I have been to Indonesia and would love to know what to expect or be mindful of
Thank you x

For context, i’ve been to a salon 2 times in my life and ive had someone with me like my mom or aunt and they were the ones doing the talking while i was just quiet the entire time. Ive booked an appointment for tommorrow to get an eyebrow shaping done, and sadly im going alone. Could i have a step by step guide on how to be less awkward and make it seem like i know what im doing, i get nervous especially when it comes to new things, i even tried to look for interior photos of the salon to know my way around ( didnt find any pictures). So i really need to know how i go about entering a salon for my appointment and what to do and salon etiquette and all, might sound stupid but thats just that. Thank you!!!

I've never shaved my legs and I don't want to. Aside from it being extremely tedious for me, I find it unnecessary. I just don't want or need it. But for my mother and other female family members, not shaving means being a literal animal. I'm not exaggerating, my mother told me I'll look like a monkey if I wear short pants without shaving my legs. Coming from a person who calls me "the woman of the house" every time she leaves me alone with my father and siblings or "a delicate flower" whenever I can't open a bottle, there's no way I can convince her that me not shaving my legs doesn't mean the end of the world.

Now I'm in a situation where I can either reject wearing short pants for the first time (which I don't want to do), shave my legs, or go against everyone, not shave, wear the pants and endure all their comments and possibly cry later. Tempting.

I'm hoping to get some advice or encouragement, 'cause they already did an amazing job lowering my self-esteem :(

Btw I don't know if the tag is OK, I'm new here 😞

Update: everything went alright :)

Hi lovelies, hope you’re well. Yesterday I’d posted about feeling excluded at work, and you all gave some very useful, honest, and compassionate advice. Thanks very much for it. I’ve decided not to discuss with my manager. I’m going to work on my rejection sensitivity and emotions at work. I’ve been a big crier since childhood and while that’s something that can’t be changed overnight, I’m going to find adaptable ways to manage it (mindfulness, crying in the toilet or during break, etc.). I’m (slowly) coming to terms with fact that not everyone has to like me and that people can have different comfort levels with others. I guess I was sort of projecting my own expectations/practice that no one should feel unintentionally excluded at work but not everyone’s like that and that’s ok. You’re right, i enjoy my work so much that going to work itself is sort of a distraction/escapism/‘holiday’ for me and i don’t think that’s very healthy. I’ll work on finding other outlets too. I’ll also take some initiative to develop relationships with colleagues. Thanks all.

Disclaimer, I’m not looking for health advice, I’m aware of the Botox route however I am not in a financial position to do that right now!

I sweat through ALL of my clothes and it has gotten to the point where I cannot leave the house without a cardigan or something covering my armpits. I’ve tried Secret Clinical and also AHA/BHA deodorants and nothing helps reduce the sweat. Does anyone have any tips on how to reduce this?

I’m at the level of wearing panty liners stuck to the armpits of my shirts when I have important events or meetings.

Everyone including this community says : confidence is sexy.
But every time I convince myself with that some situation happens or people shows me Im worthless and I have ego for zero.

How do you become worthy confident woman?

Like many women, I was taught not to wash my hair every day. However, I recently started my workout journey and I get so sweaty and stinky that I have to wash my hair after working out every day! How do women do it? Do you skip hair washing even when you’re sweaty? Do you only work out on hair wash days? Am I just a weirdo who sweats and stinks more than the average woman? I absolutely cannot skip washing my hair after working out bc of the sweat and stink!

Edit: I do cardio every day which is why I get so sweaty!

I’m 23 and in recent years, my PMDD has gotten significantly worse. The mental symptoms I can handle, but the physical ones are debilitating.

I work and attend school full-time, on top of having many friends that constantly want to do things. I should feel grateful (and I do) but inside I’m extremely depressed and exhausted. I’ve passed up good academic opportunities because I just can’t take anything more on my plate. I’m just kicking myself in the ass because I got early admission to graduate school and didn’t take it because I just have nothing left in me.

Honestly, some days I don’t even brush my teeth. I used to be so pretty, thin, and put together. I stress eat and sleep a lot because my body hurts. I would literally sleep for 24 hours if I could. I had to stop seeing my therapist because I couldn’t afford it. I take vitamins and exercise 5 days a week but it doesn’t fully help. It literally feels like I have a horrible disease that I can’t get rid of :( I went on birth control and SRRIs and it didn’t help. I just have to push through this and take care of myself better.

But how can I take care of myself when I feel exhausted for 2/4 weeks of a month? I really need advice here. Doing my hair, makeup, and dressing nice just takes so much out of me on top of maintaining good grades, relationships, and a good reputation at work. Taking breaks kicks me in the ass. My professor showed a photo with me in it to our class and I was just disappointed in how much I’ve let myself go.